Category Archives: humor

MARTIN LUTHER KING DAY MULTIPLE CHOICE QUIZ

martin-luther-king WHY WAS MARTIN LUTHER KING DAY ESTABLISHED?

A. So that it could be politically exploited by out of touch White Democrats of Privilege who think that making a hobby out of the real-life suffering that African-Americans went through means they are qualified to speak on their behalf

B. To commemorate the life of a man who expressed a message of unity and non-violence

C. So that the racist hatemongers of BLM could pretend to be honoring the man’s memory by preaching non-stop race hatred and cop killing

WHEN DEMOCRATS SAY THEY WANT A DAY OF “RACIAL HEALING” WHAT DO THEY MEAN BY THAT?

A. A day where everyone mindlessly agrees with the hatemongering rhetoric spouted by Democrats

B. A day where everyone refrains from mentioning that the Democrats were the party of the KKK, Jim Crow and slavery yet they think they’re fit to lecture the rest of us about racial matters.

C. Both A and B

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING IS AN EXAMPLE OF WHAT DEMOCRATS AND THEIR AL SHARPTON-STYLE KAPOS IN THE BLACK COMMUNITY WOULD CALL A CIVIL RIGHTS HERO?

A. An African-American teen who studies hard and works toward a better future but who gets gunned down by black street criminals

B. A black street criminal who guns down the aforementioned African-American teen as long as that criminal charges at cops and gets killed by them

C. People of color who point out that they are free to decide for themselves which political party they will vote for 

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING IS A RACIST EXPRESSION?

A. Colored people

B. People of color

C. Neither, and only a paranoid race-baiter would say otherwise

WHICH OF AMERICA’S TWO LARGEST POLITICAL PARTIES BEST REPRESENTS THE INTERESTS OF AFRICAN-AMERICANS?

A. Democrats

B. Republicans

C. Neither of those parties represents the interests of anyone except white collar criminals who hold office and the bloated rich pigs who own those office-holders

AN OVERWHELMING NUMBER OF PEOPLE SURVEYED AGREED THAT:

A. The Democrats are vermin for treating Martin Luther King Day like it’s a day they own even though King was a Republican

B. The Democrats are vermin for treating Martin Luther King Day like it’s part of one of their political campaigns

C. The Democrats are vermin Continue reading

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A CARTOON ABOUT TRUMP DERANGEMENT SYNDROME

Hysterical fascists were convinced that President Trump would destroy the world a hundred times over last year. Here’s a fun political cartoon about it.

Trump derangement syndrome cartoon

 

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55 HILARIOUS FAILED PREDICTIONS FROM PSYCHICS

earth-explodingWith 2018 underway Balladeer’s Blog takes a look at some past predictions by “psychics”  (LMAO) that turned out to be wildly off the mark.

FREDERICK DAVIES – In 1978 he predicted:

— Jimmy Carter would get reelected.

— In the early 1980s sea research would result in a cure for various types of cancer.

— A manned landing on Mars would be made by 1985.

— By 1988 a third of all homes would be using solar energy for cooking and heating.

firebird-2015-ad— Private automobiles would be banned … by 1990.

— Also by 1990 life would be discovered on Jupiter and communication with another planet – possibly from beyond our solar system – would be achieved.

— Between 1999-2001 the origin of the UFO sightings around the world would be determined. Continue reading

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ELF ON THE SHELF (2018)

Enjoy this item from Tyler Regan and Rachel Levin.

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MOTHER JONES: PRESIDENT TRUMP IS MANY HEROES IN ONE

mother-jonesMary Harris Jones, the legendary labor organizer from the 1890s onward, also known as “the Miner’s Angel” and “Mother Jones,” spoke to Balladeer’s Blog yet again, despite being dead since 1930. I wondered if she wanted to discuss the “Social Justice” being meted out on demagogues like Al Franken and John Conyers. It turned out she had other things on her mind.

BALLADEER’S BLOG: Well, hello again! I always enjoy our talks.  

MOTHER JONES: I’m glad to hear it, sonny! I continue to be very impressed with the way President Trump – the new FDR and the new Harry Truman – continues to scrap with the same kind of plutocratic oppressors I always fought.

Trump is SerpicoBB: I admit the stench from Washington, DC is amazing. “Draining the Swamp” as Trump calls it, is demonstrating the depth of corruption and outright criminal activity the Democrats and Republicans are responsible for. It took a de facto Third Party President like Trump to take the first necessary steps.

MJ: You know it, young man! No Democrat or Republican would have rocked the boat like this! I think President Trump is like many heroes in one.

BB: Well, I think “hero” might be too strong a word for Trump, but –

MJ: Yes, yes, I know I’m more enthusiastic about him than you are, but I want you to just listen for awhile.

BB: Okay.

Franklin RooseveltMJ: First off, President Trump is like Franklin Delano Roosevelt. FDR was looking out for the working class and the poor, so rich fat cat scum tried to destroy him like they’re doing with Donald Trump. They even tried the VERIFIED Businessman’s Coup plot against FDR.

Right now the way that rich pigs like Tom Steyer are trying to overturn an election they lost is disgusting and is a threat to all elections of the future. If fat cats like Steyer or the Koch Brothers don’t like the way the votes went, they’ll pull a “soft coup” as it’s called.

SECOND, President Trump is like Harry S Truman. Harry gave ’em Hell every chance he could and weak-kneed sissy boys like today’s Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell clutched their pearls and reached for the smelling salts. Trump shocks more Republican and Democrat trash in one week than good old Harry did in his entire presidency!  

BrubakerTHIRD, President Trump is like that Robert Redford fella when he played Brubaker! Like Trump, Brubaker was trying to clean out a virtual sewer of corrupt officialdom. Even if the scumbags fighting Trump oust him, it will be like the ending of Brubaker, when the prisoners – or American citizens in Trump’s case – gathered around to pay him respect.

The prisoners giving the departing Brubaker a slow clap of good bye was an acknowledgement that the man had tried to help them and to fight the crooked politicians and rich pigs abusing them. President Trump’s end might be like that if the Establishment criminals succeed in driving him from office.

BB: That’s a very profound comparison. Even if – like Brubaker – President Trump’s bottom line accomplishment is to raise awareness in all of us about the NEED to fight the white collar criminals who have hijacked our political system, there is a certain dignity in that. A dignity that people like Hillary Clinton and Paul Ryan could never understand.  

MJ: Good lad, Balladeer, but I have plenty more heroes to compare with President Trump, so pipe down.  Continue reading

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TOM STEYER DENIES BEING COMPOSED PURELY OF BODY LICE

Tom SteyerThe question puzzling the internet of late has been: Is one percenter and bloated rich pig Tom Steyer a colony creature composed of nothing but body lice? Recently a non-existent reporter for Balladeer’s Blog asked the allegedly heartless capitalist a direct question about this matter and Steyer denied it.

When faced with the follow-up question “Do you pass body lice on to those in your immediate vicinity” the parasitic oppressor of the workers replied that he had to run because it was time for a meeting with crooked members of Congress. However, Steyer STILL refuses to donate more money to charity.

Hopefully this closes the chapter on this bizarre conspiracy theory about Steyer being a colony creature composed purely of body lice. Sure it would be less disgusting than being a bloated rich pig but, as the saying goes … Continue reading

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ZOMBIES OF MONTICELLO (2013)

Thomas JeffersonBy reader request here’s my semi-regular Halloween Season blog post Zombies of Monticello, my mock movie review. I first ran this in 2013, but it may not seem as irreverent this year in the wake of the large-scale criticism of Thomas Jefferson.

ZOMBIES OF MONTICELLO (2013) – Halloween month continues at Balladeer’s Blog with this review of cult director Eddie Wozniak’s blood-soaked combination of horror and commentary.

Learn the REAL cause of Thomas Jefferson’s death on July 4th, 1826! On the 50th anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence the zombified corpses of all of Jefferson’s dead slaves rise from their graves and besiege him and his extended family in the Jefferson mansion at Monticello!

The pompous hypocrite who penned noble words about freedom and equality while OWNING other human beings tries everything to wipe out the undead legions pressing in on all sides. Continue reading

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MOCK HEADLINES: OCTOBER 3rd

Free speech 6CAL-BERKELEY ANNOUNCES NEW POST-GRADUATE COURSE IN BOOK-BURNING

CNN ANNOUNCES THAT PRESIDENT TRUMP CANNOT BE RULED OUT AS A SUSPECT IN THE LAS VEGAS SHOOTING

BRAIN-DEAD PROFESSIONAL ATHLETES NOW CLAIM THEY’RE PROTESTING UNTIL WOMEN ARE GIVEN THE RIGHT TO VOTE

… OR BECAUSE THEY WANT TO END PROHIBITION, OR SOMETHING

DEMOCRATS INSIST DR SEUSS BOOKS ARE RACIST WHEN FIRST LADY MELANIA TRUMP DONATES THEM TO LIBRARIES BUT NOT WHEN MICHELLE OBAMA READS THEM ALOUD TO SCHOOL CHILDREN  

NFL PLAYERS FORM NEW ORGANIZATION CALLED R.A.W.B.A.T. – “RAPISTS AND WOMAN-BEATERS AGAINST TRUMP”

Hillary 2020HILLARY CLINTON ACCUSES PRESIDENT TRUMP OF COLLUDING WITH HIS VOTERS TO KICK HER SORRY ASS IN THE 2016 ELECTION 

DEMOCRATS DEMAND INVESTIGATION INTO TRUMP’S ROLE IN RUSSIA SELLING ALASKA TO AMERICA

THE POPE, DESPERATE FOR ATTENTION, PROCLAIMS THAT ISLAM IS THE HIGHEST FORM OF CATHOLICISM

ROGER GOODELL CLAIMS THAT ALL THE RAPES AND DOMESTIC VIOLENCE COMMITTED BY NFL ATHLETES WERE DONE AS POLITICAL PROTESTS

NEWS READERS WHO CAN’T LOCATE PUERTO RICO ON A MAP FEIGN OUTRAGE OVER … WELL, THEY’RE NOT SURE WHAT, BUT THEY INSIST IT’S PRESIDENT TRUMP’S FAULT

Continue reading

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HILLARY “BUGSY” CLINTON BITTERLY FLAILS AT EVERYONE AND CALLS BERNIE SANDERS VOTERS “SEXIST”

Hillary Clinton tourWhite Supremacist Hillary Clinton, the pant-suited Richard Nixon on steroids, continued spouting the pompous Democrat attitude that groups they claim to “own” owe them slavish and unquestioning loyalty. Hillary said she will not offer “absolution” to women who did not vote for her.

Apparently, Delusional Hillary mistakenly thinks there are untold numbers of women who regret not voting for her. Yes, there are untold numbers of women who bitterly spout non-stop hatred for OTHER WOMEN who did not vote for Hillary, but there is NO indication that anyone wise enough to vote for the other candidates feels any sense of regret.

Hillary Clinton supportersIf anything, our de facto Third Party President Donald Trump has – merely by winning – forced the Democrats (DemCorp) and Republicans (RepubCorp) to show their real faces.

But since Crooked Hillary is still gnashing her teeth in impotent outrage here’s another look at my fictional HILLARY CLINTON EXCUSE CALENDAR. You’ll get three hundred sixty-five gems like:

THE RUSSIANS FORCED HILLARY TO RUN A FAKE CHARITY, ACCEPT BRIBES AND MISHANDLE CLASSIFIED INFORMATION!

THE VOTES OF ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS SHOULD BE THE ONLY VOTES THAT COUNT!

MALE VOTERS FELT THREATENED BY A WOMAN LIKE HILLARY WHO LIVES OFF THE ACCOMPLISHMENTS OF HER HUSBAND!

HILLARY’S SHRILL VOICE WAS SO HIGH-PITCHED ONLY DOGS COULD HEAR HER LIES AND PROMISES.

map
… … RED – Trump, Blue – Hillary

ISOLATED, HEAVILY POPULATED POCKETS OF POMPOUS SNOBS AND BLOATED RICH PIGS SHOULD GET TO DICTATE HOW THE REST OF THE COUNTRY LIVES!

 

BLACK VOTERS FORGOT WE DEMOCRATS OWN THEM LIKE WE DID ON OUR PLANTATIONS!

OBAMA TOLD HILLARY IT WAS A GOOD STRATEGY TO CALL MOST OF THE COUNTRY “A BASKET OF DEPLORABLES.”

AMERICANS ARE BIASED AGAINST CAREER CRIMINALS LIKE HILLARY! Continue reading

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MOCK HEADLINES: ANOTHER SAMPLING

fascists will call themselves anti-fascistsThe fascist scumbags and rapists from Antifa are proving the old, old saying that “The fascists of the future will call themselves anti-fascists.” How true! Antifa filth are proving that their name is short for “Anti-Fairness” even though they like to pretend it stands for something else. Anyway, those Nazis are part of this latest go-round of Mock News Headlines:  

ANTIFA PROMISES TO BEAT UP ALL ELDERLY PEOPLE IN MAGA HATS … JOHN MCCAIN APPLAUDS THEM

TRUMP-HATERS OUTRAGED THAT NOBODY BUT THEM IS MAD THAT PRESIDENT TRUMP POINTED OUT THEIR LIES YET AGAIN

two kinds of fascistsDEMOCRATS DEMAND THAT MINDLESS AGREEMENT WITH EVERY INSANE THING THAT DEMOCRATS SAY SHOULD BE A CONDITION OF EMPLOYMENT … ANYWHERE, IN ANY JOB

CNN CLAIMS PRESIDENT TRUMP IS TO BLAME FOR THEIR NEVER-ENDING OVEREXPOSURE OF HIM

CORPORATE MEDIA STILL TRYING TO PRETEND THERE IS ANYTHING PRESIDENT TRUMP COULD SAY THAT THEY WOULD NOT DISTORT OR WOULD FIND ACCEPTABLE!  

fascism is antifaCNN POLL SHOWS PRESIDENT TRUMP IS AT HIS LOWEST APPROVAL RATING WITH PEOPLE WHO DIDN’T LIKE HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE! 

CNN REPORTS THAT PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP CAUSED THE END OF THE WORLD TWICE YESTERDAY AND ONCE TODAY ALREADY  

REPUBLICAN JOHN MCCAIN CALLS ON ANTIFA TO ASSAULT HIS OWN CONSTITUENTS IN THE NAME OF LOVE

CNN SAYS PRESIDENT TRUMP IS THE MOST HITLERISH HITLER WHO HAS EVER HITLERED IN HITLER-LIKE WAYS SINCE HITLER! AND BY THE WAY – HITLER!

Antifa posterDEMOCRATS CALL FOR ROVING MOBS OF ANTIFA RAPISTS TO REPLACE CONVENTIONAL POLICE 

CNN ANNOUNCES THEY ARE WORKING ON TECHNOLOGY THAT MAKES VIEWERS SEE PRESIDENT TRUMP IN THEIR SLEEP

ANTIFA THREATENS TO KILL PEOPLE WHO POINT OUT THAT THEY ARE THE BIGGEST FASCISTS IN THE COUNTRY

WOLF BLITZER BLAMES HIS ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION ON PRESIDENT TRUMP Continue reading

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