Category Archives: humor

EXPERIMENTAL POST

question markIt’s been years since Balladeer’s Blog tried a post like this. I’ve had a few people saying I should weigh in on a certain situation but I’ve been maintaining that said situation is way too “Inside Baseball” for anyone to care. Hell, I’m barely interested in it myself.

           Here are some jokes without context and with no tags or other indicators. Let’s see if anybody even knows what these jokes are referring to. I’ll do something special for any who do. If you hate this whole idea and don’t want me to do it ever again, that’s fine, too. My point is that these people are so unknown that there’s no point in my commenting on it.

“I have no idea which of Gary’s former cellmates he fantasizes about when he has to lie next to that. The Miss Piggy comparison was being too kind.”

“When you’re in the mood for some cheap laughs, watch Gary struggle to read something out loud.” Continue reading

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Filed under humor, opinion

BALLADEER’S BLOG IS BACK

I am back after we had an area-wide power outage since yesterday morning. I will post more later today but in the meantime here’s an evergreen post that becomes more relevant every year even though it’s basically a comedy bit.

DEMOCRAT SLOGANS

mascot sword and gun pic

BALLADEER’S BLOG

“Many a true word is spoken in jest” as the old saying goes, and that becomes ever more valid by the year regarding Balladeer’s Blog’s handy list of Democrat Slogans. These slogans capture what the Democrats have REALLY become, not the glowing image that they have of themselves.

Back in 2017, when I started compiling this semi-annual post I didn’t realize how hard the Democrats would work to prove how accurate these tongue-in-cheek slogans for them are. (I used to be a Democrat until I turned Independent.)

DEMOCRATS: YOU PEASANTS ARE ALLOWED TO SAY, DO, WRITE OR POST ON THE INTERNET ONLY THOSE THINGS WHICH DON’T UPSET US DEMOCRATS.

DEMOCRATS: NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF SIMPLE-MINDED FASCISTS IN LARGE NUMBERS!

DEMOCRATS: WE’RE THE CONFIRMATION BIAS COMMUNITY!

DEMOCRATS: ALL OF OUR OPINIONS SHOULD CARRY THE FORCE OF LAW!

DEMOCRATS: WE OVERUSED THE WORD “RACIST” TO THE POINT OF MEANINGLESSNESS. NOW WE’RE DOING THE SAME WITH “WHITE SUPREMACIST” AND OUR NEW FAVORITE: “TRANSPHOBE!”

DEMOCRATS: WE ARE THE FASCISTS WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR!

DEMOCRATS: THERE IS NO OBJECTIVE TRUTH … UNLESS IT’S ONE OF OUR PARTY’S TALKING POINTS.

DEMOCRATS: WE’RE STILL WAGING WAR ON AN AMERICA THAT HASN’T EXISTED FOR DECADES!

DEMOCRATS: ONLY THOSE NEWS OUTLETS WHICH PANDER TO OUR PREJUDICES AND PRECONCEIVED NOTIONS ARE ACCURATE. ALL OTHERS ARE PROPAGANDA. Continue reading

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Filed under humor, Neglected History, opinion

LEAP DAY MILESTONES: 2024

Charles “The Bearded Badass” Darwin

Some things happen only once every four years – things like Democrat Joe Biden having a coherent thought and Republican Mitt Romney prying his head out of his ass. Another one of those things would be February 29th: Leap Day. Balladeer’s Blog takes a look at some of the milestone events that got cheated out of a yearly anniversary by happening on this date.

1704 – French provocateurs and Native Americans attack Deerfield, MA and kill roughly 50 inhabitants while abducting 100. Elizabeth Warren’s ancestor recommends killing all the Native Americans and then claiming to BE part Native American when it’s monetarily or politically convenient. Continue reading

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Filed under humor, Neglected History, opinion

RECENT U.S. PRESIDENTS: PROS AND CONS

It’s Presidents Day, so here are some sarcastic takes on the more recent presidents, with both political parties shown the irreverence they deserve.  

EisenhowerDWIGHT EISENHOWER

Character Type: Well-meaning but befuddled sitcom grandfather.

Military Service: World War One and World War Two

Motto: “FOOORE!” (Remember,  the traditional cry as you’re teeing off in golf? Oh, never mind!)

Nickname: Uncle Milty

Pro: Knew enough to distrust Richard Nixon long before it became the national pastime. 

Con: Was the first president to pronounce nuclear as “nucular”.

john f kennedyJOHN F KENNEDY

Character Type: Rich playboy who disdained both Liberals and Conservatives and played by his own rules.

Military Service: World War Two

Motto: “Thank God for television!”

Nickname: FDR  

Pro: The man was shrewd enough to distrust both liberals and conservatives equally. I can’t praise that attitude highly enough given our present circumstances. 

Con: I can’t find out what happened to this guy. Anybody hear anything?  Continue reading

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Filed under humor, Neglected History, opinion, Presidential Rap Sheets

SCARFOLK: LIKE “MY MILWAUKEE” CROSSED WITH “LOCAL 58 TV”

discovering scarfolkIf you enjoy serious analog horror like Magical World of Ania or more tongue in cheek analog horror like My Milwaukee, then Richard Littler’s Scarfolk is definitely for you. If you enjoy the eeriness of those old Public Service Messages from 1970s Canada or Great Britain that are so beloved on the internet then you’ll probably hate yourself if you still haven’t gotten into Scarfolk.   

Part haunted town, part 70s dystopia, Scarfolk refers to Littler’s fictional British town which is by turns nightmarish and hilarious. There are even undertones of Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy type of humor in the town’s faux “reference material” and “artifacts”.

dr j swift eatingAround 2012 Richard Littler began mocking up some fake 1970s public health posters and government pamphlets for schools and general consumption. He presented them with an enjoyably twisted slant that perfectly captured the vaguely menacing, often insulting approach of such material. 

Littler took to posting them on his Facebook account, where positive feedback encouraged him to start a blog devoted to his dark-humored artifacts of the nonexistent town of Scarfolk, “a town in North West England which is just west of northern England” as the author describes it.
Continue reading

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Filed under humor, Mythology

DECKER SHADO: TERRIFIC REVIEWS OF GOOD AND BAD MOVIES

decker shadoFor several years now I’ve meant to make a blog post recommending the YT Channel of Decker Shado, the often-hilarious figure who calls himself “The internet personality with the best hair.” He focuses mostly on genre films – new and old – and offers a lot of fresh insights on anything from schlock to blockbusters.

Decker’s reviews are energetic and informative even when he’s examining movies that he likes. That makes him stand out on an internet filled with snarky reviewers who can only keep a viewer’s attention when they’re insulting truly horrible movies. Continue reading

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Filed under Bad and weird movies, humor, opinion

ELVIS PRESLEY MOVIES FOR JANUARY EIGHTH

Mascot new lookJanuary 8th is the combined marking of Elvis Presley’s birthday and the Battle of New Orleans, in which General Andrew Jackson and French Pirate Jean Lafitte defeated the British in the final battle of the War of 1812.

In the past Balladeer’s Blog has observed this date with looks at the musical Rock’N’Roll vs The Redcoats and with an article on the whole Orion/ Elvis situation. This time I’m taking a quick look at some early Elvis movies.

love me tenderLOVE ME TENDER (1956) – Elvis was the latest reason that the saga of the Reno Gang/ Reno Brothers got distorted on the big screen. The need to turn the Reno story into a vehicle for Elvis Presley made this attempt the most unintentionally funny of them all.

Favorite Part: A scene between Elvis, playing Clint Reno, and Richard Egan, playing Vance Reno. Despite the fact that the long-missing Vance was given up for dead and Elvis married his mourning girlfriend in the meantime the Side-Burned One actually asks “What’s troublin’ you, Vance?”  That question has been a catch-phrase for me ever since I first saw this flick on late-night tv.

Favorite Weirdass Song: Let Me  Continue reading

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Filed under Bad and weird movies, humor

CARRY ON CHRISTMAS (1969): CHRISTMAS CAROL-A-THON 2023 CONTINUES

carry on christmasCARRY ON CHRISTMAS (1969) – Balladeer’s Blog’s 14th Annual Christmas Carol-A-Thon continues with this 50-minute British television version of the Carol starring most of the Carry On regulars. The Carry On movies were long before my time and weren’t my kind of humor for the most part. (I’m more of a Monty Python, Blackadder, Peter Cook, Dudley Moore and Absolutely Fabulous sort of guy.)

For those readers who have never given the long series of Carry On movies a try, it all started in 1958 with Carry On Sergeant, a wacky, bawdy comedy about Brits doing their mandatory National Service in the military. The hilarity and horniness continued for 30 more films set in different time periods and locales, like Carry On Up the Khyber, Carry On Spying, Carry On Nurse, etc. Continue reading

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Filed under A CHRISTMAS CAROL, Forgotten Television, humor

BRIAN MAY, JUST FOR SOME LAUGHS

I saw this floating around the internet, so here it is. I’ll have another post later today. 

brian may

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Filed under humor

ALIEN AND DUNE MOVIES AS ANALOGIES FOR AMERICA RIGHT NOW

Mascot new lookBalladeer’s Blog remains the only site on the web that equally criticizes both elected Democrats and elected Republicans, depending on which party has been committing greater offenses at the moment.

“We’re a world of 7 billion people, 10 billion blogs and 20 billion political poses” is always the opening line. So, let’s have some fun framing American politics as part of the Alien and Dune franchises. Both political parties are bashed.

Ellen RipleyRIPLEY and the other humans in the Alien films are American VOTERS. As we struggle to survive in this dangerous setting we need to stand together against the common threats. And that applies whether a voter considers themselves Independent or Democrat or Republican. Political labels have become meaningless for US as the Neo-Feudalists view all of us as peasants and cannon fodder, anyway.   Continue reading

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Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion