Category Archives: humor

MARK ZUCKERBERG, WHITE MALE OPPRESSOR, SUES NATIVE HAWAIIANS TO GET THEIR LAND

mark zuckerberg

*** * ONE PERCENTER MARK “SKIPPY” ZUCKERBERG *** *

One percenter and bloated rich pig Mark “Skippy” Zuckerberg, CEO of Fakebook and prime example of NeoColonialism, is suing HUNDREDS of kamaaina Hawaiians to force them to sale him their land. The suit is supposedly being filed because Zuckerberg wants more privacy. Privacy that he feels isn’t enough as long as those Hawaiians retain their perfectly legal rights to that land.

Zuckerberg spoke to a non-existent reporter for Balladeer’s Blog and said “Hey, when you have a lot of money you can pull strings so that the corporate media doesn’t lay a glove on you when you oppress people of color like this.”

Skippy Zuckerberg then admitted it was in bad taste to be using native Hawaiian children as human footrests like he was doing while talking to this non-existent reporter. After kicking the unfortunate children and telling them to “Get lost, punks” Zuckerberg offered further insight regarding his unconscionable behavior.

george-soros-alone

… . GEORGE “WHAT NAZIS?” SOROS

“People like me, George Soros, Carlos Slim and a few others, we can do things like this whenever and wherever we want, then five minutes later we’ll be lecturing the poor and the working class for opposing illegal immigration. We can kill negative stories about ourselves virtually at will … Hell, look how Soros has REAL Nazi connections yet it seems like he’s the ONLY guy who never gets called Hitler.” Continue reading

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MARIKAS (421 B.C.) – ANCIENT GREEK COMEDY

EupolisBalladeer’s Blog presents another look at an ancient Greek Comedy. This time around it’s one written by Eupolis who – along with Aristophanes and Cratinus – was one of the Big Three of Attic Old Comedy.

MARIKAS (c 421 B.C.) – This was the second comedy to emerge in the new subgenre of Attic Old Comedy called “the Demagogue Comedy”. Aristophanes led the way a few years earlier with The Knights, his comedy attacking the politician Cleon. The play Marikas finds Eupolis attacking the demagogue Hyperbolus, whose reputation for character assassination by way of overstatement lives on in our language by way of the word “hyperbole”.  

As with most ancient Greek comedies Marikas has survived only in fragmentary form. Those fragments, along with contemporary references in surviving works, provide what is known about the play. Marikas, the title character, was used by Eupolis to represent the politician Hyperbolus the same way Aristophanes had used the Paphlagonian to represent Cleon in The Knights.

The ancient Greek comedies made a point of breaking the fourth wall on a regular basis (despite the way so many people have convinced themselves that that is a “postmodern” development) and Marikas opened up with a character assuring the audience that the play they were about to see was NOT just a rehashing of The Knights. Continue reading

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PRESIDENTIAL ACTION AND HORROR FILMS

George WashingtonGEORGE WASHINGTON BATTLES THE BERSERKERS – During the brutal winter at Valley Forge General George Washington must contend with more than just the elements and the distant British army. The Hessian troops the Redcoats have imported from the German- speaking world have unleashed a master plan to overrun the Continental Army once and for all.

Their ranks boast a dabbler in Nordic magic and he’s concocted a mushroom-heavy formula to transform all the Hessians into furious berserkers like those of the Viking age! George is having none of it of course, and plans to turn the Pennsylvania snow red with the blood of these latter-day berserkers of the ancient Germanic god Woden.

All this plus a gay love affair between Washington and Alexander Hamilton just to guarantee lots of free publicity! 

John AdamsJOHN ADAMS: WITCHSLAYER – Remember the tale of young John Adams defending a 1700s Wiccan priestess when he was a lawyer? This movie would proceed from the notion that the young witch went on to involve Adams in a battle royal with an evil coven of dark witches who were giving paganism a bad name!

Using an aresenal of mystic weapons provided by the priestess he defended John goes on to lay the thirteen witches and warlocks of the dark coven in their graves! Throw in an Continue reading

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Filed under Bad and weird movies, Fantastic Movie Reviews, humor

TITLES FOR A HILLARY CLINTON BIOPIC

hillary-clinton-singing

. … … “Hey, big SPEN-DERRRRRR!” … … .

You have got to love the HILARIOUS news about the way bribes funneled to career criminal Hillary Clinton via her fake charity are drying up completely now that she was defeated in her attempt to steal the presidency.

What better time to ponder possible titles for the inevitable exercise in hagiography that Hillary’s clueless and uninformed Hollywood worshippers will no doubt concoct?

SHOW ME THE MONEY!

NO WAY’S HONEST: THE LIFE OF HILLARY CLINTON

HAVE PANTSUIT, WILL PANDER

HILLARY CLINTON: THE PRESIDENT OF CALIFORNIA (… WELL, AT LEAST THE PRESIDENT OF CALIFORNIA’S ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT VOTERS)

WEALTHY WHITE WOMAN: HILLARY CLINTON’S STRUGGLE TO OVERCOME OPPRESSION
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CASABLANCA CAPTIONING

FINALLY, ON THE 87TH TAKE, EVERYTHING SEEMED PERFECT ... UNTIL HENRI SUFFERED AN UNFORTUNATE ERUPTION OF FLATULENCE.FINALLY, ON THE 87TH TAKE, EVERYTHING SEEMED PERFECT … UNTIL HENRI SUFFERED AN UNFORTUNATE ERUPTION OF FLATULENCE.

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CNN REPORTS OBAMA WAS THE ONE PAYING TO BE URINATED ON

obama-defeated-by-putin-again-and-againIn keeping with the standards set by America’s corporate media here’s the latest word regarding their obsession with politicians who pay to be urinated upon by sex workers. Once again the hatred that bloated rich pigs feel toward President-Elect Donald Trump has backfired.

CNN reports that BARACK OBAMA IS REALLY THE ONE WHO PAYS TO BE URINATED ON! Michelle Obama confirmed all this, stating that this disgusting fetish of Obama’s was one of the many reasons she stopped having sex with Barack years ago. That and his insistence that she dress him up as a baby complete with a diaper. 

obama-is-a-urophiliacBarack now calls himself “An out and proud urophiliac.”

He added with a smile: Continue reading

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ELVIS PRESLEY: ROCK’N’ROLL VS THE REDCOATS

Elvis IS General Andrew Jackson at the Battle of New Orleans

Elvis IS General Andrew Jackson at the Battle of New Orleans

January 8th of each year always represents the general rift that separates American pop culture from alleged “high culture”. On the one hand it’s Elvis Presley’s birthday. On the other hand it’s also the anniversary of the Battle of New Orleans, in which General (and future President) Andrew Jackson teamed up with French pirate Jean Lafitte to hand the British their worst defeat in the War of 1812.

It’s not tough to guess which event gets more attention year in and year out, but cult director Eddie Wozniak took a break from the film world to write, produce and direct this musical comedy.

General Jackson as a one-man USO show for his battle-hardened troops

General Jackson as a one-man USO show for his battle-hardened troops

Rock’N’Roll vs the Redcoats is Wozniak’s hilarious but educational fusion of Elvis’ birthday with the martial anniversary. The musical comedy depicts the events of 1815 as they might have been depicted in an Elvis Presley movie with an actual Elvis impersonator in the lead role. So basically the star of Rock’N’Roll vs the Redcoats is a man playing Elvis Presley playing General Andrew Jackson. Continue reading

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