Category Archives: humor
THE WISEST SONG OF ALL TIME
Whenever I feel a little down or find myself contemplating the myriad contradictory truths of existence I find contentment in one particular song. I think we can all relate to the larger message behind the lyrics.
Filed under humor
NAME THE SITE BEING PARODIED AND WIN A PRIZE
Christopher Nolan: The Most Over-Contemplated Director in History
The first person to email me the name of the site being parodied in this post wins a special prize!
* TWELVE THINGS THAT TEN-YEAR-OLD CHILDREN DON’T KNOW ABOUT CLASSIC MOVIES *
* THE FOUR MOST EXCITING CRICKET PLAYERS IN HISTORY AND WHY THEY’RE REALLY THE FOUR MOST BORING CRICKET PLAYERS IN HISTORY *
* TEN REASONS WHY WE Continue reading
Filed under humor
DEMOCRATS: MORE NEW SLOGANS
Balladeer’s Blog’s initial set of sarcastic new slogans for the Democrats was such a hit here are some more. As always my criticism of the DemoKKKrats is in NO WAY an endorsement of Republican politicians, who are just like the piece of garbage Paul Ryan.
Anyway, Democrats have become such repulsive people that I like to “raise awareness” with them regarding the fact that their pompous snobbery is itself the type of bigotry they pretend to oppose.
FOR THE ORIGINAL LIST CLICK HERE
DEMOCRATS: WE ARE THE FASCISTS WE’VE BEEN WAITING FOR!
DEMOCRATS: IT’S EASIER TO JUST CONSTANTLY TELL EVERYONE HOW COMPASSIONATE YOU THINK YOU ARE THAN IT IS TO ACTUALLY BE COMPASSIONATE!
DEMOCRATS: OPPRESSING PEOPLE WHILE POSING AS THE OPPRESSED!
Balladeer’s Blog
DEMOCRATS: FILING COMPLAINTS ABOUT PEOPLE WHO SAY SOMETHING WE DISAGREE WITH IS THE HIGHEST FORM OF ACTIVISM!
DEMOCRATS: PROUDLY REPRESENTING COWARDLY HYPOCRITES, POMPOUS SNOBS AND HILARIOUSLY PRETENTIOUS ASSES!
DEMOCRATS: WE’RE EVEN BETTER AT SCREWING OVER THE POOR AND THE WORKING CLASS THAN THE REPUBLICANS ARE!
DEMOCRATS: IF THE COUNTRY IS SPLIT ALMOST 50-50 THAT MEANS THAT ONLY THE PEOPLE WHO DISAGREE WITH US ARE BEING “DIVISIVE” … NEVER US!
DEMOCRATS: WE RUINED LIBERALISM! WE RUINED THE EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM! WE RUINED THE COURT SYSTEM AND UNDERMINED THE ELECTORAL PROCESS ITSELF! PLEASE DON’T STOP US NOW!
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion
DEMOCRATS: NEW SLOGANS
Here at Balladeer’s Blog I am STILL fascinated with so much of the political realignment going on in this country. The latest word is that some of the DemoKKKrats have at last realized that their ridiculous slogan “Resistance” just isn’t working out like they’d hoped.
They’re trying out “A Better Deal,” since long ago when Democrats actually cared about the working class they had some success with FDR’s New Deal and Truman’s Fair Deal. (And remember, my criticism of the DemoKKKrats is in NO WAY an endorsement of the Republicans, too many of whom are like that piece of garbage Paul Ryan.)
Here are some appropriate slogans that the Democrats should consider:
DEMOCRATS: APPEALING TO THE WORST ASPECTS OF HUMAN NATURE FOR ROUGHLY TWO HUNDRED YEARS!
DEMOCRATS: WE’D RATHER SEE THOUSANDS OF YOU PEASANTS GET KILLED THAN SEE ONE SINGLE MUSLIM TERRORIST INCONVENIENCED AT AN AIRPORT!
DEMOCRATS: BEFORE REPUBLICAN JOSEPH MCCARTHY THERE WAS DEMOCRAT MARTIN DIES!
DEMOCRATS: WE’LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU PEASANTS FOR HUMILIATING ME SO BADLY! (I understand Hillary Clinton suggested this one.)
DEMOCRATS: WE CAUSED THE DOMESTIC SPREAD OF SLAVERY, THE TRAIL OF TEARS, THE JAPANESE INTERNMENT, THE SPOILS SYSTEM AND THE KKK, THEN PASSED THE BLAME ON TO THE REST OF YOU!
DEMOCRATS: PROTECTING ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS FROM THE SCUM CALLED AMERICAN CITIZENS!
DEMOCRATS: REMEMBER “DON’T TRUST ANYONE OVER THIRTY?” WE’VE ADJUSTED THAT TO “DON’T TRUST ANYONE UNDER SEVENTY OR OVER TWENTY-ONE!”
DEMOCRATS: YOU PEONS NEED TO GET USED TO THE FACT THAT THIS COUNTRY EXISTS SOLELY TO PERPETUATE PRIVILEGES FOR OUR POLITICAL PARTY! Continue reading
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion
CNN: THE LEADING NAME IN FAKE NEWS
Any bets if CNN will ruthlessly threaten to dox the person behind this gif, too?
Filed under humor
MOTHER JONES: MELANIA TRUMP IS THE GREATEST FIRST LADY SINCE JACKIE KENNEDY
With the mean-spirited slug Michelle Obama slithering back into public view this week, THE Mother Jones – Mary Harris Jones – decided to grant another posthumous interview to Balladeer’s Blog.
Balladeer’s Blog: You seem excited about something, “Mother” Jones.
Mother Jones: I am! I was admiring the way First Lady Melania Trump – who speaks more languages than both Obamas – has been dazzling the world lately!
BB: Now that you mention it, she HAS been, and it’s been fun watching Trump-haters froth at the mouth over it.
MJ: The people who hate the Trumps are the same wealthy pigs who hated me when I was alive. Anyway, Melania’s charismatic tour de force made me reflect on what a nice change of pace she is from that bitter, frowning sow Michelle Obama. Did you see Melania with those children in Italy? Wonderful! Michelle would have been chiding the children about “white privilege” or some such thing. Continue reading
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion
HATE GROUPS IN AMERICA
Here at Balladeer’s Blog I criticize both American Liberals and American Conservatives, both Democrats and Republicans. For overseas readers here’s a handy guide to American Hate Groups.
BLM – “Klansmen of Color” aka “Kop Killers Klub.” This pack of Democrats HATES the thought that ALL LIVES MATTER and pretends that police are automatically the enemy.
This bizarre group has actually petitioned various areas to do away with police. Uh, yeah. Next time you need the police call BLM instead. They won’t be any help but I’m sure they WILL direct you to a site where you can make a donation to them.
LA RAZA – “Racists Without Borders” aka “The Master Race” aka “THE Race.”
This pack of Democrats (notice a trend here) are “Conquistador-Americans” whose Spanish ancestors slaughtered the indigenous inhabitants of much of North and South America.
Members of La Raza now feel that they are entitled to a “Reconquista” of areas where their blood-soaked forebears butchered their victims. They’re big supporters of illegal immigration, too. Continue reading
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion
KATY PERRY TELLS HER FANS TO EMBRACE TRUMP FANS AND SAY “I LOVE YOU”
Wow! What kind of fool thinks you can actually address the problems of the real world with brainless, sugar-coated nonsense like this! Doesn’t she realize there are some people who won’t care what feelings you express toward them?
Doesn’t Krazy Katy understand that sometimes you are dealing with irredeemably destructive people who have no intention of reciprocating any civilized gestures made toward them? When dealing with such hatred and savagery does Katy seriously think this kind of warmed-over mush can accomplish anything?
I can’t even … OMG and LOL, dude! BLOCKED! Continue reading
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion
HILLARY CLINTON: TEN DRINK MINIMUM
California President Hillary Clinton has become a caricature of herself! Her frantic “Blame Everybody Else For Me Losing” Tour continues! I attended Crooked Hillary’s performance last night. Her one-woman show is titled The Hatred That Seethes Within Me Will Animate My Crooked, Rotted Carcass Long Enough To Run Again in 2020.
Wow! And you thought The Effect of Gamma Rays On Man-In-The-Moon Marigolds was a mouthful! Anyway, Hillary was on her game, which of course means that she drank constantly, slurred her words, fell down a lot, had long coughing jags, then lied and lied and lied over and over again.
It’s rare for real life to feature a vile figure like Hillary getting her comeuppance so enjoy it! The whole world should be grateful that United States President Donald Trump kept both Hillary Clinton AND Jeb Bush out of the Oval Office!
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion
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