D3 20 COOLEST

Some e-mailers have been asking whatever became of my list of the 20 Coolest Named College Sports Teams You May Never Have Heard Of editions for NCAA Divisions 2 and 3. To satisy the curiousity of my readers who wanted to see me tackle the team nicknames in D2 and D3 here we go. The D2 list will be along later. As always you can reach me at Thtcom15@aol.com . One quick note: since the UC-Santa Cruz Banana Slugs have gotten so much exposure for their name compared to other Division 3 teams they are not on this list but will be a Cool Named Team Of The Day soon. Now here’s the D3 list:

20. TUFTS JUMBOS

Location: Medford, MA

Conference Affiliation: New England Small College Athletic Confernce

Comment: As cool as the Tufts Mediums and the Tufts Petites are , the Tufts Jumbos are still the best value for your money. And no, the school wasn’t named after Sonny Tufts from the movie Catwomen Of The Moon but wouldn’t it be cool if it was?

19. WASHINGTON AND JEFFERSON PRESIDENTS

Location: Washington, PA

Conference Affiliation: President’s Athletic Conference

Comment: Why does a school named after former football star Gene Washington and sitcom character George Jefferson have teams called the Presidents? At least they could call their teams the Super Presidents after that joyously bad old cartoon series.

18. YESHIVA MACCABEES

Location: New York, NY

Conference Affiliation: Skyline Conference

Comment: So the one guy says “The Maccabees are revolting” and the other guy says “I’ll say they are!” …Sorry, I was channeling an old Borscht Belt comedian for a moment there. But seriously, folks, isn’t the Maccabees an incredibly cool name for sports teams?

17. ST NORBERT COLLEGE GREEN KNIGHTS

Location: De Pere, WI

Conference Affiliation: Midwest Conference

Comment: The Saint Norbert teams are ready to go Medieval on our behinds! Thankfully, though, their logo doesn’t include a beheading ritual like in the original Green Knight myth!

16. MARY BALDWIN COLLEGE SQUIRRELS

Location: Staunton, VA

Conference Affiliation: USA South Athletic Conference

Comment: Call me weird but I really like the fact that somewhere there are sports teams called the Squirrels. If only the University of Maine-Augusta Moose was Division 3 I could have had a “moose and squirrel” combo on this list! And isn’t that the angriest squirrel you’ve ever seen outside of a Troma movie?

15. NC WESLEYAN BATTLING BISHOPS

Location: Rocky Mount, NC

Conference Affiliation: USA South Athletic Conference

Comment: Yes, I know Ohio Wesleyan’s teams, also in D3, are called the Battling Bishops, too, but North Carolina Wesleyan’s logo is cooler so that was the tie-breaker. And feel free to insert your own “Pugnacious Popes” or “Crotchety Cardinals” joke here.

14. MCDANIEL GREEN TERROR

Location: Westminster, MD

Conference Affiliation: Centennial Conference

Comment: Green Terror is not only a stylishly cool nickname for sports teams but it also has an old pulp story feel to it. You can picture stories like “The Moon Man And The Green Terror” or “The Green Terror Strikes Again!”

13. ROWAN PROFS

Location: Glassboro, NJ

Conference Affiliation: New Jersey Athletic Conference

Comment: As noteworthy as Professor X, Professor Irwin Corey and Professor Plumb are, they just don’t compare to the coolness that IS the Rowan Profs. And their football helmets are pretty cool, too!

12. MANHATTANVILLE VALIANTS

 

Manhattanville ValiantsLocation: Purchase, NY

Conference Affiliation: Middle Atlantic Conference

Comment: Yes, Manhattanville…It’s just south of Townsville and east of Beatsville! I defy you to find another sports blog on the internet that fuses D3 sports, Power Puff Girl bits and bad movie references as seamlessy as Balladeer’s Blog does!

11. OHIO NORTHERN POLAR BEARS

 

ohio_northern_university_73771Location: Ada, OH

Conference Affiliation: Ohio Athletic Conference

Comment: A cool nickname and logo like this deserve a cool factoid to accompany them: the Polar Bear population in Ohio now outnumbers the LeBron James fans in the state…It’s true!

10. BRANDEIS JUDGES

Location: Waltham, MA

Conference Affiliation: University Athletic Association

Comment: Everyone remembers the brilliant Louis Brandeis so what better nickname for this school’s teams than the Judges? Okay, for laughs they could have called their teams “The Brandeis Briefs” and used one of the Fruit Of The Loom guys as a mascot.

9. WISCONSIN-STEVENS POINT POINTERS

Location: Steven’s Point, WI

Conference Affiliation: Wisconsin Intercollegiate Athletic Conference

Comment: I’m a dog lover so this team’s nickname and logo are irresistable to me. This mascot deserves his own Saturday morning cartoon series!

8. CONNECTICUT COLLEGE CAMELS

Location: New London, CT

Conference Affiliation: New England Small College Athletic Conference

Comment: A camel is pretty much your best bet for getting around in the arrid desert clime of Connecticut. And I’ve heard that Camels can carry a 6 month supply of nutmeg in their humps.

7. HEIDELBERG STUDENT PRINCES

Location: Tiffin, OH

Conference Affiliation: Ohio Athletic Conference

Comment: I’m a fan of the silent movie and operetta versions of the story of The Student Prince In Old Heidelberg so I just had to include this incredibly cool nickname on this list!

6. JOHN JAY BLOODHOUNDS

Location: New York, New York

Conference Affiliation: City University Of New York Athletic Conference

Comment: Since John Jay was the first Chief Justice of the U.S. Supreme Court I was kind of hoping that this school’s teams would be called the Justices. But you have to admit the nickname Bloodhounds is pretty darn cool!

5. LASELL COLLEGE LASERS

Location: Newton, MA

Conference Affiliation: North Atlantic Conference

Comment: Incredibly cool nickname that I’m surprised hasn’t already been used by other teams! And rumor has it if you go to games dressed like the supervillain the Living Laser you can get in at half-price!

4. MARITIME COLLEGE PRIVATEERS

Location: Throggs Neck, NY

Conference Affiliation: Skyline Conference

Comment: A privateers team in New York can’t help but make me think of Privateers from the Revolutionary War, one of my favorite topics! And that logo makes you want to grab a sword and start raiding British shipping yourself!

3. MISSISSIPPI COLLEGE CHOCTAWS

Location: Clinton, MS

Conference Affiliation: American Southwest Conference

Comment: There are all kinds of reasons why the Choctaws’ nickname is one of the coolest around! Okay, the logo and football helmets are a little too Kansas City Chiefs but you can’t have everything!

2. KNOX PRAIRIE FIRE

Location: Galesburg, IL

Conference Affiliation: Midwest Conference

Comment: NAIA sports has the Prairie Wolves, D3 has the Prairie Fire. And in honor of the late Match Game host Gene Rayburn, a graduate of Knox, let me say this: “The Knox Prairie Fire logo is so cool (“How cool is it?”) It is so cool many fans get it tattooed on their “blank”.

1. OGLETHORPE STORMY PETRELS

Location: Atlanta, GA

Conference Affiliation: Southern Collegiate Athletic Conference

Comment: “Don’t know whyyyyyyy there’s no sun up in the skyyy – Stormy PET-relllllllls.” A Stormy Petrel is a low-flying seabird whose appearance was believed to foreshadow the arrival of a storm. Petey the Petrel here looks ready to kick butts and take names!

MORE COOL STUFF

For the 20 Coolest-Named JUCO Sports Teams click here: https://glitternight.com/2010/10/18/the-20-coolest-named-juco-sports-teams/

For the 20 Coolest-Named College Sports Teams In the USCAA and NCCAA click here  – https://glitternight.com/2010/11/24/the-20-coolest-named-uscaa-and-nccaa-sports-teams/

For more cool named teams that weren’t on the Top 20 List click here: https://glitternight.com/category/cool-names-and-cool-logos/

For the NAIA edition of The 20 Coolest College Sports Teams You May Never Have Heard Of click here: https://glitternight.com/2010/06/21/the-20-coolest-named-college-sports-teams-you-may-have-never-heard-of-naia-edition/

For the NCAA Division 2 Coolest-Named College Sports Teams click here: https://glitternight.com/d2-20-coolest/

And for The 20 Coolest College Sports Logos click here: https://glitternight.com/2010/07/20/the-20-coolest-college-sports-logos/

For The 20 Coolest Football Helmets In NCAA Division 3 click here: https://glitternight.com/2010/08/23/the-20-coolest-football-helmets-in-ncaa-division-3/

Balladeer’s Blog is not affiliated with or operated by the NAIA or or the NCAA or any member institutions.
© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
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  8. This is spectacular! Nobody I know has ever heard of these teams! And you are so fuuny!

  9. Very funny! Your remarks are great!

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