Tag Archives: humor

COTTABUS PLAYERS (CIRCA 420s B.C.): ANCIENT GREEK COMEDY

Balladeer’s Blog examines yet another ancient Greek comedy which has survived only in fragmentary form.

Theater of Dionysus

The Ruins of the Theater of Dionysus in Athens.

COTTABUS PLAYERS (c 420s B.C.) – This comedy was written by Ameipsias, whose career as an Athenian comic poet ran from approximately the 420s B.C. to the 390s B.C. In the Dionysia Festival of 423 B.C. he won 2nd Place for his comedy Connus and in 414 B.C’s Dionysia he won 1st place for The Revelers. Ameipsias also won 1st place at a Lenaea Festival but the year and title of his entry are not known.

Regular readers of Balladeer’s Blog will remember that Cottabus was a party game in ancient Athens and had two variations. The “lesser” variation involved the hard-drinking guests (and virtually ALL guests at ancient Athenian parties were hard-drinking) throwing the wine-lees at the bottoms of their cups at a plate balanced on a pole, with the winner being the one who knocked the plate off the pole.

masc chair and bottleThe “greater” variation, to the proud, sea-faring Athenians, who “ruled the waves” long before Britons came along, involved throwing their wine-lees at plates floating in a pool, with the winner being the one who sank each plate. This small-scale equivalent of naval warfare was, according to Athenaeus, the more prestigious version and was characteristic of a more “high-end” party.

The all-important Chorus of this comedy by Ameipsias was presumably a set of rowdy, drunken Cottabus players. Let’s take a look at what can be gleaned from the surviving fragments:

** The comedy’s characters were SO drunk (“How drunk were they?”) they were using their projectile vomiting instead of wine-lees to sink the floating plates.      Continue reading

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JOE BIDEN’S BIZARRE “NO MALARKEY” SLOGAN

Biden no malarkeyJoe Biden’s hilariously bizarre but endlessly entertaining political campaign continues. Nibbling on his wife’s fingers while she was trying to deliver a speech on his behalf, telling pervy stories about little kids rubbing his “hairy legs” around a public swimming pool, claiming he comes from “the black community” and that he went to “an HBCU,” Joe always brings the crazy.

Sometimes it’s not his fault, like when his dentures came loose during one of the televised debates, his grotesquely bloody eye during another debate, Obama preferring to endorse Canada’s Prime Minister while snubbing Joe, etc. But for every time fate makes Joe’s buffoonish nature impossible to ignore there are plenty of other times when he is the author of his own destruction. Well, destruction plagiarized from someone else, anyway.

biden fingerBiden’s inept coverup of his and his son Hunter’s corruption, the inane “gang member Corn Pop” tall tale, and so much more came to mind when I learned Quid Pro Joe’s newest slogan: “No Malarkey!” Seriously. THAT’S what he and his staff came up with. I guess they feel that slogan is the bee’s knees. Or the cat’s pajamas.  

If you’re going to use a pathetic and outdated expression like “No Malarkey” you should at least go all the way and add “Dagnabit!” at the end of it. C’mon, Joe! Commit to the bit! 

Will Joe’s opponents for the Democrats’ nomination escalate things? Will they announce new slogans like “No balderdash!”, “No hooey!”, “23 Skidoo” or “I’m what made us wiser than the Kaiser?” Should voters watch out for “Oh, rubbish!” or “Stuff and nonsense!” or a dangerously succinct “Nertz!” This could spiral out of control if they’re not careful. One of them may even resurrect “No horseplay!” in response to Joe’s creepy public pool story and his pervy confession that he loves it when children jump in his lap.

mascot new look donkey and elephant headsI can’t wait for insider accounts of the Biden campaign so I can read all about the bitter in-fighting over whether or not to use an exclamation point or a more statesmanlike period after Malarkey in that slogan. And did Joe’s advisers warn him that Americans might not be ready for a Malarkey-denier in the White House?

It remains to be seen if Biden’s new zero tolerance policy regarding Malarkey will be the game-changer he feverishly hopes it will be, but in the meantime “No Malarkey” has joined Wendell Wilkie’s “No man is good three times” as my favorite absurd campaign slogan.    

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BALLADEER’S BLOG’S THANKSGIVING WITH J.J. ABRAMS

Harold LloydHappy Thanksgiving from Balladeer’s Blog and my very special guest J.J. Abrams (left). Yes, I know that’s Harold Lloyd. I’m a Silent Movie geek, remember?

J.J. is thankful that there are still plenty of successful movie and television franchises left for him to tamper with and utterly destroy.

But hey, lens flares! Amirite?  Continue reading

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EVEN MORE HILARIOUSLY WRONG PREDICTIONS FROM PSYCHICS

One of Balladeer’s Blog’s biggest hits in recent years was my look at 55 Hilariously Wrong Predictions From Psychics (click HERE ). You readers have been asking for more, so here we go with predictions for 1975-2000:

New York City underwaterMALCOLM BESSENT

*** By 1979 the United States will have a war with China.

*** New York city will be uninhabitable by 1980 because of rising water levels. People are STILL trying to sell that one. They just keep pushing the alleged time period further and further into the future.

DAVID BUBAR

*** By 1980 social drinking will virtually come to an end in America due to health consciousness.

*** By 1979 M.D.’s will ally themselves with faith healers. (Maybe as a Bowling League, but certainly in no other way)

*** By 1990 psychics will hold important government positions as intuition and clairvoyance become more important.

nuke-the-moon*** During the 1980s consumption of the chemicals in food will cause generations of freakishly tall people. Their abnormal size will weaken their bodies and personalities.

*** By the mid-1980s both America and the Soviet Union will try to colonize the moon, leading to military “police actions” on the moon itself. Continue reading

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MOTHER JONES: TRUMP IS THE NEW ABRAHAM LINCOLN

Donald Trump rock starJust last night Mother Jones described de facto Third Party President Donald Trump as “the new Abraham Lincoln, saving the country from more Democrat perfidy.”

Yes, Mary Harris Jones, aka “Mother” Jones, once again contacted Balladeer’s Blog posthumously to express her admiration for President Trump in his one-man stand against the swamp of corruption that masquerades as the United States government.

According to Mother Jones last night: “Listen, Balladeer, in a way Trump is having to serve as both Lincoln AND General Grant. And as Lincoln said about Grant so we can say about President Trump. We cannot spare this man. He fights.”

Mother Jones also provided this excellent article skewering the Democrats’ false narrative and their not-an-impeachment-just-an-impeachment-inquiry. This procedure, by the way, VIOLATES THE PROCEDURES FOLLOWED WHEN PURSUING IMPEACHMENT AGAINST ANDREW JOHNSON, RICHARD NIXON AND BILL CLINTON.

Pelosi fake impeachment inquiryThe link is below, but first some excerpts:

“The attempt at impeachment is best understood as a legislative coup against a democratically elected president, and the radical leftists in Congress are working arm-in-arm with the deep state saboteurs and their allies in the media in order to try to effectuate this illegal coup.”

“The deep state is a collection of permanent bureaucrats enmeshed inside the federal government who can’t be fired or removed — at least historically, have not been able to be — because of misguided civil service laws. They believe they know better than you, and your listeners, and the voters how the country ought to be run.”

” At this moment in time, the deep state has a knife aimed at the heart of American democracy, and that’s what you’re seeing playing across your TV screens and newspapers pages and online, with these so-called whistleblowers, who are, of course, in fact, angry hate-filled rage-driven bureaucrats determined to take down the President of the United States and illicitly and improperly using the Whistleblower Protection Act in order to effectuate their designs.”

March for Trump“One of the gravest threats that we face today — and I can’t emphasize this enough — to our republican form of government is the unelected deep state, and I’ll explain what I mean by that. The Constitution of the United States, Article II, states very clearly that, and this is a quote, ‘The executive Power shall be vested in a President of the United States of America.’ What that means is that the whole executive power is vested in one democratically elected person: the president. The president, who is accountable to the voters — the president, who is accountable to the American people, holds and wields the executive power.”

“Every other person in the federal government in the executive branch is an extension of his authority, is acting as an extension of his authority delegated to them. They have no independent authority. So when a deep state bureaucrat says, ‘I don’t want Donald Trump to be president. I don’t want to effectuate his policies. I don’t want to carry out his agenda, so I will do the opposite,’ they’re violating the Constitution and they’re taking away the power of the American people to elect who heads the executive branch and what policies they implement.”

“… they’ll spin and fabricate and lie to create their desired narrative to try to steer policy in the direction they want to steer it in, and the most dangerous expression of this — of course, we’ve seen — has been in the intelligence community, which is amassed with awesome power, awesome capabilities, and they’re directing that and wielding that — in some cases — against a duly-elected President of the United States of America, which is a form of sabotage that should terrify everyday American citizens. That is now the situation we find ourselves in.”

Trump in the way“Why? Because this president dared to disrupt two-party betrayal of the American people over many decades: betrayal on trade, betrayal on China, betrayal on foreign policy, betrayal on our southern border, betrayal on our economy, decade after decade, year after year, administration after administration. This president dared to stand up to defy that betrayal — was elected to end that betrayal — but the people who profited like parasites off of that betrayal are now the ones trying to prevent him from executing the agenda that the American people installed him to execute. That’s the situation we find ourselves in today.” Continue reading

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RANDOM WEIRDNESS: SUNDAY EDITION

Balladeer’s Blog’s Random Weirdness item makes its long-awaited return with this little honey:

random weirdness satan

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DEMOCRAT FREDERICA WILSON CALLS FOR PEOPLE WHO RIDICULE MEMBERS OF CONGRESS TO BE PROSECUTED

#WalkAwayBrain-dead Frederica Wilson, Democrat member of Congress (aka “bought and paid-for whores”) openly called for people who ridicule members of Congress to be prosecuted. For what, the little imbecile apparently couldn’t say.

The simpleton also stumbled over her brief statement, confusing “unacceptable” and “not unacceptable.” Frederica, who dresses like a rodeo clown, is apparently one of those Democrats who think they are our rulers rather than our elected representatives.

Thank you, Frederica, for driving even MORE of us former Democrats to the #WALKAWAY movement. CHECK OUT #WALKAWAY online, by the way. It’s home to a lot of us former Democrats who have grown disgusted with what intolerant fascists that party has become. See also, Antifa’s (Really KLAN-Tifa’s) threat to start acid attacks next. Definitely not the party of FDR and JFK anymore. 

For Frederica’s idiocy click Continue reading

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