Unfortunately, Dolly Parton, singer and movie starlet, has passed away. Here’s my review of her film with James Woods.
STRAIGHT TALK (1992)
Dolly’s Role: Shirlee Kenyon
James’s Role: Jack Russell
Comment: James Woods as the leading man in a romantic comedy? With Dolly Parton as his love interest? Believe it or not this Lady of Many Talents and the Man of a Thousand Personae even pull off THIS! Continue reading
Filed under opinion
EDDIE L. DRISCOLL played several different Movie Host characters during his THIRTY-THREE years working at the same television station – WLBZ Channel 2 in Bangor, Maine. That Maine location made Driscoll’s characters the Movie Hosts that a certain horror author had watched in his youth (see below). Eddie’s shows aired throughout Maine and into Canada’s Maritime Provinces.
I’ll dive into the hosts played by Driscoll in a moment, but first I want to emphasize how the man embodied the kind of local television station figures who just don’t exist anymore. Eddie started work for Channel 2 the day that the station began broadcasting in 1954.
Over the years, he worked there as a cameraman, weather man, kiddie show host and much more. He retired from WLBZ in 1987. His Movie Host characters:
MOLDY – This figure was a one-eyed hunchback who hosted Shock Theatre from a moldy old crypt on Saturday nights at Midnight. As Moldy, Driscoll presented the original Shock! package of horror movies from Fall 1962 until some point in 1963.
UNCLE GORY – From 1964 to 1967 Eddie hosted his new Saturday night at Midnight show titled Weird. On this Bad Movie Show he played Uncle Gory, a Dungeon Master in a fur vest and a mop-top wig. Uncle Gory hosted from his dungeon with a human skull displayed on a slab near him. He presented each week’s movie like it was a story coming to life from a book he was reading aloud.
Weird was firmly in the So Bad They’re Good school of Movie Hosting. Driscoll got to show off his sarcasm on Golden Turkeys from the 30s, 40s and 50s. Sci-Fi schlockers like Not of this Earth were also shown on Weird and on those nights Eddie’s versatility let him host those flicks as Krandal the Martian, a three-eyed alien from the Red Planet. Continue reading
Filed under Bad and weird movies, Movie Hosts
FOR PART ONE CLICK HERE. PART TWO HERE. PART THREE HERE. PART FOUR HERE. PART FIVE HERE. PART SIX HERE.
PART SEVEN – Picking up where we left off, Ofe the chief conspirator in the murder of Ozidi the Elder had cowardly fled once again rather than face the avenging son Ozidi the Younger in combat. Ozidi’s grandmother Oreame cast spells to flush out Ofe no matter where he was hidden.
Ofe’s magic had let him hide underneath the ground itself and he now involuntarily sprang upward from that hiding spot and stood face to face with Ozidi the Younger. With the eyes of everyone living in Orua on the combatants, Ofe had no choice but to at long last stand his ground and face his fate.
Ozidi advanced, wielding his sword made of lightning while his musicians played and sang his glories. Though Ofe was a coward he possessed powerful magic and fought Ozidi to a draw.
As the hours passed, our hero at last got past the defenses of Ofe’s own mystical weaponry and prepared to deliver the death blow. Ozidi’s lightning sword sliced his foe’s body in half at the waist. Continue reading
Filed under Mythology
Monday means a current events roundup from Independent Voter Site Balladeer’s Blog.
ICE’S LATEST ACTIVITIES DEAL WITH ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS – MANY OF THEM GANG MEMBERS – CONVICTED OF ATTEMPTED MURDER, BURGLARY AND MORE. And remember, the only reason they were still at large was because of Democrat “sanctuary” policies.
ICE AGENTS ARREST PREVIOUSLY DEPORTED ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT WHO KILLED BUT WAS RELEASED THREE TIMES BY “SANCTUARY” POLICIES IN DEMOCRAT-HELD MASSACHUSETTS. As always, Democrats provide no sanctuary for the victims, only for the perpetrators.
ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT CHARGED WITH POURING HOT WAX ON HER CHILD AND WITH STARTING A FIRE. She did it in a TikTok video. Privileged white one-percenter Bruce Springsteen should be asked about this.
REPULSIVE DEMOCRAT SING-ALONG MOCKING FREE SPEECH MARTYR CHARLIE KIRK’S ASSASSINATION AS THE ONE-YEAR ANNIVERSARY APPROACHES. More HERE.
CALIFORNIA’S DEMOCRAT GOVERNOR GAVIN NEWSOM SIGNS LAW STOPPING INVESTIGATIVE JOURNALISTS FROM REPORTING ON CORRUPTION AND FRAUD IN THE STATE GOVERNMENT. Unreal. Can you IMAGINE the shrieking from Democrats if the opposing political party did this? Continue reading
JOHNNY COOL (1963) – Okay, this weekend I once again met someone who never heard of this film, so I resolved to do what little I could to spread the word about it by reviewing it here on Balladeer’s Blog.
Even among cult films, Johnny Cool has a certain prestige. It was released in October 1963 – the month before President John F. Kennedy was assassinated. Peter Lawford, JFK’s brother-in-law and Rat Pack member was a co-producer and got fellow Rat Pack figures Sammy Davis, Jr. and Joey Bishop to appear in the movie.
Sammy was still wearing his pre-glass eye eyepatch in the film and also sang the movie’s title song. There’s a boatload more kitsch casting in Johnny Cool, which I’ll cover as we go along.
Our story begins in Italy, where aspiring young Sicilian hoodlum Salvatore Giordano (THE Henry Silva) is rescued from the police by former American Mafia bigwig Johnny Colini (Marc Lawrence himself). Like the real-life gangster boss Lucky Luciano, Colini was arrested and deported to Sicily after getting sold out by his organized crime rivals and allies back in the States.
Colini mentors the violent diamond-in-the-rough Giordano and grooms him into an instrument of revenge for himself against his enemies in America. When the homicidal prodigy is polished and ready, Colini rechristens him Johnny Cool and sends him to the U.S. to settle accounts. Continue reading
Filed under Bad and weird movies, opinion
It has literally been almost a year since Balladeer’s Blog did a post in my Transgress with Me series, so here we go. For newbies, I’m an Independent Voter who used to be a Democrat until they became such intolerant fascists.
*** At present, it’s the Democrats who are the worst authoritarians and hatemongers, but I have bashed figures from both major political parties here.
*** All “news” outlets are biased, but at present Democrat outlets still far outnumber those for the opposition party, and that has resulted in a false impression of a national consensus on various issues and topics. (But it’s the fault of the Republican Party that they are still so far behind in the Media Arms Race.)
*** Democrats mistakenly believe that successfully censoring dissenting opinions means they are “in the right.”
*** When pompous Democrats put up those nauseating signs that say “Hate has no home here” what they really mean is “Hate has no home here, except for our perfectly righteous hatred of everyone who disagrees with any of our political opinions.”
*** Democrats are only content in environments where they have a captive audience, like in schools or H.R. “classes” or wherever they can use the full force of the government or other higher “authorities” to impose silence on those who disagree with them.
*** If you want people killed or injured just because they voted differently than you did, then they aren’t the fascists – YOU ARE.
*** Democrats are still at war with a version of America which hasn’t existed in decades.
*** There are still imbeciles who think President Trump told people to drink or inject themselves with bleach.
*** Democrats are not liberals – they’re illiberal. Democrats are not progressives – they’re regressive.
*** Yes, Ashley Biden’s oft-mentioned diary has entries in which she says her father Joe Biden took “inappropriate” showers with her when she was a child. She also said she was “probably” abused. Continue reading
Filed under opinion
With college football kicking off in the divisions covered here at Balladeer’s Blog in just a few days, here’s something I haven’t done in years – a look at football helmets for some very obscure teams.
MINERSVILLE
Team Name: BATTLIN’ MINERS
Comment: This team name begs the question “Is there also a team called the Minin’ Battlers?”
*** Continue reading
Filed under Cool Helmets
Back in 2021 I reviewed the first 12 1970s stories featuring Marvel’s martial arts hero Shang-Chi HERE. Then in 2024 I reviewed several stories which teamed up Shang-Chi and another 70s Marvel kung fu hero – Iron Fist, HERE.
For newbies to this IP, in 1973 Marvel licensed the use of Sax Rohmer’s Fu Manchu plus other characters from the Fu Manchu tales. Rather than just churn out a Fu Manchu comic book series “the House of Ideas” instead combined it with the Kung Fu craze of the time and created Shang Chi, the son of Fu Manchu.
Shang Chi, as a surrogate Bruce Lee, and Sir Denis Nayland-Smith, as a surrogate Braithwaite from Enter: The Dragon, were the core of the new series. Shang Chi started out as an operative of his evil father Fu Manchu but realized the error of his ways and threw in with Sir Denis and his team to battle his father’s malevolent schemes.
Many of Sax Rohmer’s other characters showed up in the series, including Fah Lo Suee, the daughter of Fu Manchu. The series expanded from just Fu Manchu storylines. Writer Doug Moench and artist Paul Gulacy churned out some of the best stories in this title, with Gulacy often drawing Shang-Chi to resemble the late Bruce Lee.
Shang-Chi, Master of Kung Fu had its own inimitable style and was largely one of the most innovative comic books of the 1970s and early 1980s. “Largely” is the key word.
Idiotically, Marvel depicted Shang-Chi forever barefoot and forever wearing a goofy outfit like he was advertising a local martial arts academy. It mars the MOKF series as surely as the artwork for Ebony drags down 1940s and 1950s Spirit stories. So, when possible I will sprinkle in pics of 1970s martial arts movie star James Ryan who genuinely looked like Shang-Chi but wearing regular clothing.
MASTER OF KUNG FU Vol 1 #29 (Jun 1975)
Title: The Crystal Connection
Villains: Velcro and Razor-Fist
Synopsis: Sir Denis Nayland Smith has Shang-Chi join him and other team members in a mission against international heroin dealer Carlton Velcro. The other team members are series regular Black Jack Tarr, former Royal Marine Commando, and semiregular Clive Reston, a walking meta reference.
NOTE: Clive Reston is a capable espionage agent whose schtick was that offhand references he makes establish something that is never specifically spelled out – his father must be James Bond and his grand-uncle must be Sherlock Holmes. It was kind of clever at first but eventually grew tiresome.
Our heroes take a seaplane to Velcro’s mansion in a grotto near France’s Gulf of Lions. Reston poses as a buyer of a large amount of heroin who then burns all of his purchase and an enormous amount of the drug dealer’s additional inventory of smack.
All this was a distraction to allow Shang-Chi and Black Jack Tarr to infiltrate the mansion. Reston ends up captured and Shang-Chi comes face to face with Velcro’s bodyguard Razor-Fist in their VERY FIRST encounter. Continue reading
Filed under Superheroes
Full title: THE REV. JOHN SMITH DIED – AND WENT TO JUPITER VIA HELL (1908) – This bizarre but memorable work was published by the Juno Society of the time and was written by an anonymous author. The title clergyman passes away and finds himself in Hell – not forever, but as an ambassador to Jupiter.
Before he can be sent to that interplanetary posting Smith must witness the horrors of Hell. In this odd tale the ruler of Hell is a woman named Satinita the Sexless Queen. She first shows him how many fellow clergymen are in Hell for eternal punishment.
After that, Satinita takes Rev. Smith on a tour of New York City’s Red Light District, bars, illegal casinos … and the Stock Exchange. Following this ham-fisted attempt at satire, Smith is dropped off on Jupiter as a guest of the planet’s Omu Family.
The family members become his guide to life on Jupiter, where everyone is ruled by a being called the Unity. There is one planet-wide language, and that’s just the beginning. Continue reading
Filed under Ancient Science Fiction
Independent Voter Site Balladeer’s Blog is here with a current events roundup from an America where Democrats spent over a decade claiming “wokeness” wasn’t a thing – and even pretended that people who used the word couldn’t define it because, they claimed, “it didn’t exist.” Now Democrat loon AOC openly admits “Woke One was crazy and is over” and that “Woke Two” is here.
NEVER believe Democrats when they claim something they’re guilty of isn’t real or isn’t happening. Inevitably, they will be forced to admit that it exists and is happening. (Same with Vote Fraud, Political Bias in Education, etc.)
DEMOCRAT CANDIDATE ROY COOPER SCANDAL OVER PAY-TO-PLAY SCAM WHEN HE WAS GOVERNOR. He became a wealthy man while in office.
DEMOCRAT CANDIDATE PLEADS GUILTY TO WIRE FRAUD. The R.I.C.O. party strikes again.
IRAN’S MAD-DOG REGIME CAUSES UNITED ARAB EMIRATES TO SUSPEND ALL TRADE WITH IRAN OVER THEIR LATEST VIOLENCE. Fighting Iran’s current rulers is as necessary as fighting war criminal Vlad Putin.
LATEST EXPOSE: THE BIDEN REGIME FBI MISCLASSIFIED INFO TO HIDE BIDEN FAMILY CRIMES. Took a while to find, but here it is.
PRESIDENT TRUMP IS STILL LOWERING HEALTH CARE COSTS AND HAS LOWERED MEDICAID PRICES BY THREE POINT FIVE PERCENT. Continue reading
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