THE BOSTWEEDS: FASTER, PUSSYCAT! KILL! KILL!

Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, with another musical shoutout. It’s the Bostweeds -no, not the Mighty Mighty Bosstones – the Bostweeds with the iconic opening song to the Psychotronic film classic Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!

I’ve always felt that if I get married I’d like my bride-to-be to walk down the aisle to an instrumental version of THIS song. It might even be a deal-breaker!

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MOCK HEADLINES: ANOTHER SAMPLING

fascists will call themselves anti-fascistsThe fascist scumbags and rapists from Antifa are proving the old, old saying that “The fascists of the future will call themselves anti-fascists.” How true! Antifa filth are proving that their name is short for “Anti-Fairness” even though they like to pretend it stands for something else. Anyway, those Nazis are part of this latest go-round of Mock News Headlines:  

ANTIFA PROMISES TO BEAT UP ALL ELDERLY PEOPLE IN MAGA HATS … JOHN MCCAIN APPLAUDS THEM

TRUMP-HATERS OUTRAGED THAT NOBODY BUT THEM IS MAD THAT PRESIDENT TRUMP POINTED OUT THEIR LIES YET AGAIN

two kinds of fascistsDEMOCRATS DEMAND THAT MINDLESS AGREEMENT WITH EVERY INSANE THING THAT DEMOCRATS SAY SHOULD BE A CONDITION OF EMPLOYMENT … ANYWHERE, IN ANY JOB

CNN CLAIMS PRESIDENT TRUMP IS TO BLAME FOR THEIR NEVER-ENDING OVEREXPOSURE OF HIM

CORPORATE MEDIA STILL TRYING TO PRETEND THERE IS ANYTHING PRESIDENT TRUMP COULD SAY THAT THEY WOULD NOT DISTORT OR WOULD FIND ACCEPTABLE!  

fascism is antifaCNN POLL SHOWS PRESIDENT TRUMP IS AT HIS LOWEST APPROVAL RATING WITH PEOPLE WHO DIDN’T LIKE HIM IN THE FIRST PLACE! 

CNN REPORTS THAT PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP CAUSED THE END OF THE WORLD TWICE YESTERDAY AND ONCE TODAY ALREADY  

REPUBLICAN JOHN MCCAIN CALLS ON ANTIFA TO ASSAULT HIS OWN CONSTITUENTS IN THE NAME OF LOVE

CNN SAYS PRESIDENT TRUMP IS THE MOST HITLERISH HITLER WHO HAS EVER HITLERED IN HITLER-LIKE WAYS SINCE HITLER! AND BY THE WAY – HITLER!

Antifa posterDEMOCRATS CALL FOR ROVING MOBS OF ANTIFA RAPISTS TO REPLACE CONVENTIONAL POLICE 

CNN ANNOUNCES THEY ARE WORKING ON TECHNOLOGY THAT MAKES VIEWERS SEE PRESIDENT TRUMP IN THEIR SLEEP

ANTIFA THREATENS TO KILL PEOPLE WHO POINT OUT THAT THEY ARE THE BIGGEST FASCISTS IN THE COUNTRY

WOLF BLITZER BLAMES HIS ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION ON PRESIDENT TRUMP Continue reading

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JUST ONE WEEK TIL COLLEGE FOOTBALL SEASON KICKS OFF!

Yes, the divisions of college football covered here at Balladeer’s Blog get started earlier than the others. Next Thursday the 24th will be the kickoff for the 2017 season.

AUGUST 24th’s GAMES IN THE NAIA:

Dickinson State Blue Hawks helmet NEWThe 15th ranked DICKINSON STATE BLUE HAWKS will host their Frontier Conference rivals the ROCKY MOUNTAIN COLLEGE BATTLIN’ BEARS. 

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Evangel CrusadersThe EVANGEL UNIVERSITY CRUSADERS take it on the road against the number 9 team in the nation – the GRAND VIEW UNIVERSITY VIKINGS.  

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Warner Memorial U Royals helmetThe WARNER UNIVERSITY ROYALS will likewise play Road Warriors as they travel to take on the UNIVERSITY OF THE CUMBERLANDS PATRIOTS. 

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Dakota Wesleyan Tigers helmet NEWMeanwhile THE AG BOWL will pit the number 17 DAKOTA WESLEYAN UNIVERSITY TIGERS against the DAKOTA STATE TROJANS in a North Star Athletic Association matchup.

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Pikeville BearsAnd the UNIVERSITY OF PIKEVILLE BEARS will be on the road to take on their familiar foes the CAMPBELLSVILLE UNIVERSITY TIGERS.

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AUGUST 24th’s GAMES IN THE NJCAA:

garden-city-broncbusters-helmet-newThe Defending Champions – the GARDEN CITY COLLEGE BRONCBUSTERS – open the season hosting the ELLSWORTH COLLEGE PANTHERS.  

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Highland ScottiesThe HIGHLAND COLLEGE SCOTTIES, meanwhile, will travel to face the DODGE CITY COLLEGE CONQUISTADORS to begin their 2017 campaign. 

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THE STOLEN PLANET (1906): ANCIENT SCIENCE FICTION

Stolen PlanetTHE STOLEN PLANET (1906) – Written by John Mastin. Jervis Meredith, a wealthy young British man and his equally wealthy friend Fraser Burnley are so brilliant they invent anti-gravity. Next the young tycoons have a spaceship built so they  can use their anti-gravity device to tour outer space.

The battleship-sized craft is named The Regina and combines propellers with Meredith and Burnley’s anti-gravity invention. The friends set off with a ten-man crew and – oddly enough – they are so paranoid about people stealing their secrets they have rigged an elaborate bugging system throughout the Regina so they can know what the crew members talk about.

The explorers make the eccentric decision to explore the region around Sirius first, rather than our own solar system. Enroute the Regina accidentally pulls an uncharted planet out of its orbit (?) and causes it to collide with another uncharted planet. This collision causes a new sun to be born. (Regular readers of Balladeer’s Blog will remember that this was apparently a big idea for a time since a lot of these old stories feature suns forming from colliding planets.)

Eventually our heroes decide to explore some planets on their way to the star Sirius. On the first planet they visit the explorers find enormous ruins obviously built by a gigantic race that is now extinct. The structures were beautiful from what can be made out and are made of materials unknown on Earth.

Jervis and Fraser – British to the core – “annex” the planet in the name of the King of England. They name the world Silens and soon find the atmosphere to be so radioactive they must leave before they suffer permanent damage.

Next the Regina survives an encounter with a comet, then lands on another planet. This one is many times the size of Earth and with gravity thousands of times greater. All the animals of this planet (Inimicus Ingens) are gigantic compared to Earth animals. Even germs are so large they are visible to the naked eye.

The explorers are captured by the world’s enormous humanoids but manage to escape the beings with a spunky alien sea creature as their new mascot. A guided missile that the aliens shoot at the Regina fails to hit it. Continue reading

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DEMOCRATS: THE SMIRKING JACKASSES OF LIFE

Democrats don't control meBalladeer’s Blog would be just fine if both the Democrats’ and Republicans’ political parties – or the “Royal Houses” as I call them – were destroyed. Both parties are in the pocket of one percenters and bloated rich pigs. This is why the bought-and-paid-for office-holders from both parties are fighting President Donald Trump so fiercely. He’s not a career politician so he is under attack by the same forces that Franklin Roosevelt had to defy.

Under Obama the Democrats lost literally around 1,100 political seats on the federal and state levels. Those seats were all UNEARNED by the Republican Party, which is led by garbage like Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell. People’s disgust with RepubCorp and its owners has become slightly less than it is with the Democrats and their owners so they’ve been voting for Republicans just to keep more Democrats out.

Unfortunately, Republicans like Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell mistakenly think the voters are enamored with the Republican Party’s perpetual air of confusion and incompetence. Republican and Democrat career politicians are nothing but white collar criminals. More and more of us are turning away from both Parties.

Which brings us back to why Democrats are the slimiest filth of the moment and have driven away so many of us:

liberals and conservativesI often get emails and comments that say things like: “Given the type of things you write about you’re clearly not a Conservative so why do you bash Liberals so much?” Or even: “What makes American Democrats such unbearable jackasses?”

Let me provide one small example that is a microcosm of the way American Liberal Democrats have become nothing but smirking jackasses who don’t know nearly as much as they think they do.

Not so long ago, one of America’s female Conservatives (which one is not important to this example) was speaking at a Tea Party event and closed by exhorting her audience to “Party like it’s 1773.”

American Liberals all across the media and the internet had a field day ridiculing the woman for saying that. In their usual prickish, pompous manner American Liberals assumed the woman had meant to say 1776, which was the year the Declaration of Independence was signed. Liberal asses repeated their snobbish “Conservatives are stupid” meme over and over again because of this incident.

The symbol of the nonexistent Balladeer Political Party

The symbol of the nonexistent Balladeer Political Party

Actually since the Boston Tea Party, the event the Tea Party takes its name from, happened in 1773 – NOT 1776 – the Conservative Woman had the right year. That simple fact was lost and/or ignored in the slew of jokes about how “historically illiterate” Conservatives supposedly are for defending the woman. Talk shows, news shows, internet humor outlets all ran with the usual “Conservatives are morons” sentiment for several days.  

Let me emphasize this for overseas readers: the people who had the historical reference RIGHT became national laughingstocks and were being ridiculed as “stupid” by the people who were WRONG about the historical reference. Corrections were never run or aired by any of the offending outlets. The historical fact was lost in the rush to ridicule and all the general public remembered was that, supposedly, once again Conservatives had revealed how “stupid” they are. Continue reading

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DEMOI (C 417 B.C.) – ANCIENT GREEK COMEDY

FOR BACKGROUND INFORMATION IF YOU MISSED MY FIRST POST ON ANCIENT GREEK COMEDIES CLICK HERE: https://glitternight.com/2011/09/22/at-long-last-my-ancient-greek-comedy-posts-begin/

map of greeceAs promised this time around I’ll depart from the works of Aristophanes to examine the fragmentary remains of a work by another genius of Ancient Greek Comedy, in this case Eupolis. 

Eupolis was part of the Big Three of Ancient Greek Comedy (henceforth AGC) along with Aristophanes and Cratinus. Some people confuse Eupolis with the later Greek comedian Eubulus but manage to lead fairly normal lives just the same. (rimshot)

THE PREMISE

Demoi is considered to be Eupolis’ greatest political satire. The premise is simplicity itself. An Athenian named Pyronides, like many of his fellow citizens, is disgusted with the pettiness, corruption and incompetence of the current crop of political and military leaders in the great city-state. Thus motivated, Pyronides retrieves four of the greatest figures of Athens’ storied past from the Netherworld and brings them back with him so they may set things right.

THE PLAY

In my introductory post about AGC (see above) I illustrated the similar problems faced by the Athenians’ ancient experiment in popular rule and our own often teetering enterprise. Corruption, partisanship and a tendency to subordinate the general good in the name of personal gain  were as rampant then as now.

As all societies are prone to do, the Athenians romanticised the leaders of the past, believing them to be of a heroic stature lacking in the current crop of Athenian politicians and generals. Continue reading

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CHINESE MYTHS: THE MOON GODDESS CHANG-O AND YI, THE DIVINE ARCHER

Yi the Divine Archer

Yi the Divine Archer

On August 15th the Chinese people offered up gifts to Chang-O, their moon goddess. (Technically they did it in the middle of the 8th Lunar Month of the year but in the modern day August 15th is the substitute date.)

Balladeer’s Blog presents the story of Chang-O, her husband Yi the Divine Archer, and the origin of that ritual.

I.WHAT’S UP WITH YI?  – Yi the Divine Archer from Chinese mythology deserves to be remembered in one breath with some of the other great heroes and monster slayers from belief systems around the world. Most people are only familiar with his feat of shooting down multiple suns that appeared in the sky one day, but this article will provide a light- hearted look at all of his fantastic adventures. 

Yi is Continue reading

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