Monkees member Peter Tork is dead. Not since the infamous Day The Music Died has the rock world suffered such a loss. I’m kidding! Still, though, here’s a Balladeer’s Blog goodbye to the one and only member of the Monkees whose name always puts me in mind of the measure of a force’s tendency to produce torsion equal to the product of the force vector and the radius vector from the axis of rotation to the point of application of the force.
I think you’ll agree.
Anyway, I considered reviewing the Monkees’ movie Head or maybe even the motorcycle flick Torque but instead I’m going with this look at the NEW Monkees show from 1987.
The New Monkees are remembered as the most pointless re-launch of a band in history AND as one of the worst television shows in history. I’ve never listened to their one and only album so I can’t say if they make it a Hat Trick with one of the worst albums in history, too.
The premise sounds like a comedy sketch from the glory days of SCTV but unfortunately this thoroughly bizarre attempt to recapture the flukish charm of the original Monkees was 100% real.
Let’s look at the debut episode of The New Monkees‘ 13 episode run in 1987. Everything you’ve heard is true: We get Rocky Horror Picture Show lips voiced by a black lady, a weird sci-fi mansion home for the title foursome, a built-in diner and their annoying butler, Manford.
The laugh track does NOT go off during the few things that seemed funny, like a couple of apparently ad-libbed jokes by the New Monkees during their screen test footage, but instead goes off during lame, obvious jokes that not even small children would laugh at. Continue reading
ROUND ONE, GAME ONE – (The top 2 seeds in the Sun Conference get a bye in the 1st round.) The 3rd seeded AVE MARIA UNIVERSITY GYRENES took the court against the 6 seeds – the SAINT THOMAS UNIVERSITY BOBCATS. The Gyrenes parlayed a 39-29 Halftime lead into an 80-69 triumph. Ave Maria University was led by Leo Behrend with 23 points. 
ROUND ONE, GAME TWO – The 5 seeds – the COLLEGE OF COASTAL GEORGIA MARINERS – visited the 4th seeded KEISER UNIVERSITY SEAHAWKS. At the break the Seahawks held a 39-34 advantage over the Mariners. The College of Coastal Georgia came back to force Overtime with a 76-76 tie to end Regulation. In the extra session the Mariners won it 86-85. Jaylen Smallwood’s 23 points led CCG. 
ROUND ONE, GAME ONE – The 3 seeds – the MAYVILLE STATE COMETS – faced the 6th seeded VITERBO UNIVERSITY V-HAWKS in this game. The Comets had mustered a 43-40 edge by the Half and from there they got more and more separation from the V-Hawks, ultimately winning the game by a score of 88-75. Gorg Alhag led the way for Mayville State with his 28 points. 
DEMOCRAT ILHAN OMAR VOWS TO MAKE HER DISTRICT “JEW-FREE BY 2020” 
ALEXANDRIA OCASIO-CORTEZ DECLARES ALL CHILDREN UNDER SIXTEEN YEARS OF AGE TO NOW BE SIXTEEN YEARS OF AGE (with apologies to Woody Allen’s Bananas)
DEMOCRAT MEDIA BEGS PUBLIC FOR A NEW HATE HOAX THEY CAN EXPLOIT TO FAN THE FLAMES OF HATRED: CNN’s Don Lemon in tears
Yes, in a not-so-subtle attempt to exploit Aquaman‘s suprising success it’s a Warner Archives Blu-ray of the telefilm Man From Atlantis. Patrick Duffy stars as Marcarus, the (seemingly) last survivor of Atlantis with Victor “King Tut” Buono as his evil archenemy Mr. Schubert. 
The 2019 College Basketball postseason is underway in the divisions covered here at Balladeer’s Blog! As usual the NAIA’s Chicagoland Collegiate Athletic Conference tipped things off with Round One of their Conference Tournament last night. 
TOP SEED FALLS – The 8th seeded UNIVERSITY OF SAINT FRANCIS (IL) FIGHTING SAINTS took on the CCAC’s top seeded OLIVET NAZARENE UNIVERSITY TIGERS. The Fighting Saints showed they were in it for the win, playing hard enough for a 34-33 edge at Halftime. The teams put up 47 points each in the explosive 2nd Half as USF emerged with an 81-80 Upset. Cole Micek led the victors with 24 points. 
FOUR OVER FIVE – In the 4 spot the ROOSEVELT UNIVERSITY LAKERS (shoutout to a regular reader of Balladeer’s Blog who went there) welcomed the 5th seeded ROBERT MORRIS (IL) UNIVERSITY EAGLES. The Eagles put the Lakers on Upset Alert at the break with a 31-28 advantage but Roosevelt U came roaring back for a 79-70 victory. Kevin Day’s 23 points led the Lakers and his teammate Grant Gibson notched a Double Double with 15 points and 10 rebounds. 
Just when you thought the Nathan Phillips hate-hoax debacle would have taught Democrats to stop with their insane, paranoid fantasies about people in MAGA hats we see Jussie Smollett’s claim of being attacked by men in MAGA hats allegedly falling apart. 
Democrat race-baiters in politics and the media jumped to conclusions YET AGAIN and fanned the flames of race-hatred when this looked like a white-on-black attack. Now that Smollett’s story has come under more and more scrutiny those same Democrat worms are falling back on “let’s wait til all the facts come in” LIKE THEY SHOULD HAVE DONE WHEN SMOLLETT’S CLAIMS FIRST CAME TO LIGHT. 
Balladeer’s Blog’s examination of the Justice Society’s World War Two-era stories continues. FOR PART ONE CLICK 
ALL STAR COMICS #22 (Fall 1944) 
Synopsis: A mystical female figure who embodies “The Conscience of Man” summons the Justice Society of America. 
NJCAA (National Junior College Athletic Association) 1. VINCENNES UNIVERSITY TRAILBLAZERS ### 2. FLORIDA SOUTHWESTERN STATE BUCCANEERS ### 3. COFFEYVILLE COLLEGE RED RAVENS ### 4. RANGER COLLEGE RANGERS ### 5. NORTHWEST FLORIDA STATE RAIDERS ### 
6. SHERIDAN COLLEGE GENERALS ### 7. SOUTH PLAINS COLLEGE TEXANS ### 8. ODESSA COLLEGE WRANGLERS ### 9. CAPE FEAR COLLEGE SEA DEVILS ### 10. SOUTHEASTERN (IA) COLLEGE BLACKHAWKS ### 
As another Presidents Day wraps up here’s a take from a true working class heroine. Mary Harris Jones, the legendary labor organizer from the 1890s onward, also known as “the Miner’s Angel” and “Mother Jones,” spoke to Balladeer’s Blog yet again, despite being dead since 1930. 
BB: I admit the stench from Washington, DC is amazing. “Draining the Swamp” as Trump calls it, is demonstrating the depth of corruption and outright criminal activity the Democrats and Republicans are responsible for. It took a de facto Third Party President like Trump to take the first necessary steps. 
MJ: First off, President Trump is like Franklin Delano Roosevelt. FDR was looking out for the working class and the poor, so rich fat cat scum tried to destroy him like they’re doing with Donald Trump. They even tried the VERIFIED Businessman’s Coup plot against FDR. 
THIRD, President Trump is like that Robert Redford fella when he played Brubaker! Like Trump, Brubaker was trying to clean out a virtual sewer of corrupt officialdom. Even if the scumbags fighting Trump oust him, it will be like the ending of Brubaker, when the prisoners – or American citizens in Trump’s case – gathered around to pay him respect. 
MJ: FOURTH, President Trump is like Serpico. The real-life Serpico, not the weak sauce movie version of the man. Like Frank Serpico, President Trump is the only one refusing to play business as usual and just get bought off. 
HAPPY PRESIDENTS DAY! What better way to poke through the undeserved air of reverence that often clouds this holiday than by taking a look at the Five Most UN-qualified people who rose to the presidency. And remember, this list is not a reflection of their subsequent performance as president, just on their qualifications prior to taking the office. 
NUMBER 5: ULYSSES S GRANT 
