Tag Archives: Balladeer’s Blog

THE RUINED BRUIN (1961): BAD MOVIE

Ruined BruinTHE RUINED BRUIN (1961) – Written and directed by THE John K McCarthy, The Ruined Bruin was another one of those late “nudie cuties” which would make modern audiences yawn and wince … But would no doubt REALLY excite Furries!

In the past Balladeer’s Blog has reviewed the closing years of the Nudie Cutie subgenre as it went through its final convulsions in the form of gimmicks, each one more absurd than the last. I’ve reviewed Nude on the Moon, The Naked Witch, Orgy of the Dead, Doctor Sex and others.

The Ruined Bruin features a bear – really a costumed man (Myron Griffin) – who escapes from the Los Angeles Zoo and, for no apparent reason than so this movie could be made, tries to romance assorted gorgeous half-nude ladies.

Despite their name the Nudie Cuties never featured full nudity. Toplessness and some butt-shots were all you got, with strategically and/or improbably placed branches, shrubs or rail fences covering pubic regions. Fans of Peter Sellers will remember the classic sendup of those nudie cuties that he worked into one of his Inspector Clouseau films.   

The appeal of these movies is barely understood today, when you can find any visual stimulation you want with just a few clicks on your keyboard but decades ago Nudie Cuties really packed ’em in.

At any rate Buddy the Bear (Griffin) escapes from the zoo and, equipped with his Boris and Natasha-level Russian accent for his voice-over, takes in the sight of plenty of beautiful women. When the first one rejects his advances (and no, I don’t know why a bear is interested in human women any more than I know why cartoon mice characters often woo female cats away from their feline arch-enemies) Buddy tries to transform himself into a human male. Continue reading →

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NAIA AND NJCAA WORLD SERIES: DAY FOUR IN BOTH

NAIA

georgia gwinnettDAY FOUR, GAME ONE: The first of three elimination games pitted the 5 seeds – the GEORGIA GWINNETT COLLEGE GRIZZLIES – against the 9th seeded BELLEVUE (NE) UNIVERSITY BRUINS. The Grizzlies took charge right away, grabbing a 3-0 1st Inning lead that became a 4-1 advantage in the 4th.

From there Georgia Gwinnett College outscored the Bruins 5-2 for a 9-3 triumph behind the pitching of Gregory Loukinen. Gregory was on the Mound for 9 Iron Man Innings.

USAO Drover newDAY FOUR, GAME TWO: In the 2 spot the UNIVERSITY OF SCIENCE & ARTS OF OKLAHOMA DROVERS took on the 3 seeds – the Defending National Champion SOUTHEASTERN UNIVERSITY FIRE. A 4-0 Drovers lead in the 1st Inning turned into a Pitcher’s Duel for the next 4.

USAO expanded their lead to 5-0 in the 6th Inning but the Fire cut that to 7-4 in the 7th. The Drovers notched another Run on their way to an 8-4 dethronement of the champs. Jean Muntaner was the winning Pitcher. Continue reading →

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FOOL KILLER: PART TWENTY-ONE: FOLLY, TEXAS – DECEMBER 31st, 1899

Balladeer’s Blog continues its examination of the many facets of Fool Killer lore. FOR PART ONE, INCLUDING THE HISTORICAL CONTEXT, CLICK HERE

Fool Killer picPART TWENTY-ONE: I’ll return to my look at the 1910-1917 and 1919-1929 version of the Fool Killer next time around. For this segment I’ll conclude the new Fool Killer Letter received here at Balladeer’s Blog from THE actual, supernatural entity himself. (SEE HERE ) This second part of that letter clarifies some of the Fool Killer’s hibernation periods AND details a heretofore UNKNOWN 1899 escapade of the supernatural vigilante.

(cont’d) Anyway, Mr Wozniak or Eddie or Balladeer or whatever you prefer to go by, that was how I came to be. And like I said, you’re no Charles Napoleon Bonaparte Evans or James Larkin Pearson but I’ve been a mighty long time without a confidant so you’ll do.

As you guessed, my ability to hibernate for years in my hidden cavern home, then emerge dressed in up to date men’s fashions is another unearthly characteristic I inherited from my Daddy, whatever he may really have been, damn him. While I sleep it’s like the changes in the world come to me as dreams, so I’m always aware of the alterations in the zeitgeist.

You probably noticed I never need to eat and the only thing I ever drink is alcohol. I don’t NEED to drink, but maybe my Mama’s heritage shines through with that, because one thing I truly love to slam down is good old American liquor. Preferably bourbon.

I had to smile at your feeble speculations regarding when exactly I returned to my cave to hibernate over the decades. Since you’re so all-fired obsessed with whens and wheres and hows, I’ll throw you a few crumbs here.

Sartana as Fool Killer 5After I drove my Daddy out of the Tennessee Hills I spent the rest of the 1830s and the early 1840s killing off any fools who tried mining or stealing the hidden gold of the Melungeons. During that same period the fools in Washington, DC started sending men into the mountains of Tennsessee, Kentucky, Virginia and North Carolina to stop the Melungeons from minting their own gold coins, so I took to exterminating those federal agents, too. “Counterfeiting” my ass!

But times changed, and the feds persevered in claiming the government in Washington were the only ones who could mint coins. I saw I’d only be bringing a war down on the heads of my Mama’s people the Melungeons if I kept killing federales so I let up on that. 

By the late 1840s I had decided to make a home out of the remote, now-abandoned cave where my Daddy used to ply his blacksmithing and other mystic trades. I moved in and settled down for my very first period of hibernation. I woke up just a bit short of 1850 and befriended Mr Charles Napoleon Bonaparte Evans at the Milton Chronicle in North Carolina.

After corresponding with him about my fool-killing vocation for over a decade I took my second nap in the summer of 1861 after telling Evans that I damned the fools of both the North and the South for bringing on that Civil War. As you know from the surviving letters I sent to Mr Evans I emerged from that hibernation in the late 1860s.

For several years I kept busy slaying, among others, Ku Klux Klan fools AND the Carpetbaggers from the North during Reconstruction. My walking stick – forged in my Daddy’s eldritch smithy and with its grinning skull headpiece made of fine Melungeon gold – killed plenty and my set of Bowie Knives drank the blood of many a fool as well.

cowboy gunsAnyway, you don’t need every damn detail, boy. Suffice it to say that around 1880 or ’81 I hibernated again, then pursued my new mission among the Melungeons, this time adding guns and rifles to my arsenal. After several years of that I slept again, then upon awakening I was drawn westward.

One day I’ll tell you all about the many fools I snuffed out in the old west. It’s a wonder I didn’t depopulate the entire region. For right now, however, I’ll recount an adventure that happened right before my next period of slumber.

Sartana as Fool KillerIn late December of 1899 I was traveling through west Texas, riding along in that wagon I had taken to using during my 1880s activities back among the Melungeons. In the summer of ’99 I had taken a brief return trip to the East and on my way back out west I had that run-in with the sinister, Infernal fair along the Old Pike Road in Alabama. The tale that George Ade wrote about.         

My destination was Folly, Texas. You can’t find it or what’s left of it now but back then it was southwest of Lubbock and almost right at the border of Texas and New Mexico. Texans of the time said nothing thrived in that part of the Lone Star State except cacti. Continue reading →

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THE RAVYNS: RAISED ON THE RADIO

This time around on Balladeer’s Blog’s Give Them A Shoutout Before They’re Dead it’s the Ravyns and their song Raised On The Radio: 

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NAIA COLLEGE WORLD SERIES DAY THREE, PLUS NJCAA RESULTS

NAIA

Southeastern University Fire NEWDAY THREE, GAME ONE: The 3 seeds – the Defending National Champion SOUTHEASTERN UNIVERSITY FIRE – took the diamond against the 8th seeded INDIANA TECH WARRIORS (should be the Hoplites). After 2 scoreless Innings the Warriors went up 2-0 in the 3rd.

The 5th Inning saw Indiana Tech make it a 4-0 advantage until the Fire cut that to a 4-3 edge in the 6th. The 9th Inning ended in a 5-5 tie, with Southeastern University eking out a 6-5 victory in the TENTH. Marc Soto pitched for the win in this elimination game.

St Thomas (Fl) Bobcats logoDAY THREE, GAME TWO: In this game the 6th seeded SAINT THOMAS UNIVERSITY BOBCATS faced the 2 seeds – the UNIVERSITY OF SCIENCE & ARTS OF OKLAHOMA DROVERS. A 2-2 tie in the 2nd Inning became a 4-2 Bobcats edge in the 3rd.

Saint Thomas University extended their lead to 6-0 in the 4th Inning but the Drovers shut them out from there. USAO drove in Runs in the 5th, 8th and 9th Innings, falling just short as the Bobcats won it 6-5. Pitcher Ian Exposito notched the W. Continue reading →

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COLLEGE WORLD SERIES: NJCAA AND NCAA ACTION

NJCAA DIVISION ONE

Iowa Western ReiversDAY TWO, ONLY GAME PLAYED: The IOWA WESTERN COLLEGE REIVERS took on the CONNORS STATE COWBOYS. A 1-1 2nd Inning tie exploded into a 10-2 Reivers lead in the 3rd.

By the 6th Inning Iowa Western College was on top of the Cowboys by a tally of 16-10. The Reivers added 2 more Runs in the 8th for an 18-10 triumph. Braedyn McLaughlin was the winning Pitcher.

NJCAA DIVISION TWO

Northeast Nebraska HawksDAY TWO, GAME ONE: The 7 seeds – the NORTHEAST (NE) COLLEGE HAWKS – did battle with the 10th seeded MONROE (Rochester) COLLEGE TRIBUNES. Neither of these teams could stop the other from scoring for the first several Innings and by the end of the 5th the Tribunes were on top 11-9.

The Hawks went on top 13-11 in the 8th Inning and with Monroe College notching just 1 lone Run in the 9th, Northeast won the game by a Polo Score of 13-12. Pitcher Alex Potter got the Save.

mesa college thunderbirds logo BIGDAY TWO, GAME TWO: The 3rd seeded MESA COLLEGE THUNDERBIRDS clashed with the 6 seeds – the LINCOLN LAND COLLEGE LOGGERS. After 3 scoreless Innings the Thunderbirds went up 1-0 in the 4th.

Mesa College registered a Shutout of the Loggers and the only other Run scored the rest of the way was by the Thunderbirds in the 7th. Mesa College won it 2-0 behind Pitcher Carter Robinson, who was on the Mound for 9 Iron Man Innings. Continue reading →

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CONCLUSION: AMERICA’S QUASI-NAVAL WAR WITH FRANCE (1798-1801)

HAPPY MEMORIAL DAY! Ending this holiday weekend’s dose of seasonal posts is this concluding part of Balladeer’s Blog’s look at America’s undeclared naval war with France from 1798 to 1801. FOR PART ONE CLICK HERE  . 

Enterprise

MAY ?, 1800: (Some sources place this action in late April) The USS Boston, commanded by “the American Horatio Nelson” himself, Captain George Little, was in the Bight of Leogane, where it fought and sank a force of six French-allied ships in the navy of Hyacinth Rigaud. (Rigaud’s infamy was covered in Part One)

MAY ??, 1800: The Adams recaptured an unidentified vessel which had previously been taken by the French and converted for its navy’s use.

MAY ??, 1800: The Insurgent and the Adams teamed up to liberate an unidentified British privateer ship from the French craft which had captured it.

MAY ??, 1800: The Adams recaptured the Nancy (one of many vessels with that name), a ship previously seized by the French for their own navy.

MAY ??, 1800: The Adams defeated and captured the French ship Grinder. 

MAY ??, 1800: A very busy month for the Adams came to an end as the feisty vessel overcame three to one odds to defeat and capture the French ships the Dove, the Renommee and a third ship whose name has not come down to us.   

MAY 31st, 1800: The John Adams (separate vessel from the Adams) recaptured the American brig Olive from the French.  

JUNE 6th, 1800: The Merrimack battled the French vessel L’Hazard in order to free the French ship’s latest capture – the American Ceres.  The Merrimack succeeded in liberating the Ceres. Continue reading →

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NCCAA WORLD SERIES CHAMPS CROWNED PLUS NAIA, NJCAA & NCAA ACTION

NCCAA

Concordia Michigan Cardinals LOGOCHAMPIONSHIP GAME: The 5 seeds – the CONCORDIA (MI) UNIVERSITY CARDINALS – played the 3rd seeded WARNER UNIVERSITY ROYALS in the Championship Game of the NCCAA World Series. After 2 scoreless Innings the Cardinals eked out a 1-0 edge in the 3rd.

A Pitcher’s Duel commenced for the next 4 Innings before both teams’ bats caught fire in the 8th. The Royals drove in their only 2 Runs that Inning while Concordia University added 5 to their total, ultimately winning the game 6-2. Billy Blair pitched for the win. * THE CARDINALS ARE CHAMPIONS OF NCCAA BASEBALL *

NAIA

USAO Drover newDAY TWO, GAME ONE: The 2nd seeded UNIVERSITY OF SCIENCE & ARTS OF OKLAHOMA DROVERS did battle with the 10 seeds – the LEWIS-CLARK STATE WARRIORS (should be the Explorers). Neither team got on the scoreboard until the Drovers went on top 1-0 in the 3rd Inning.

USAO expanded their lead to 3-0 in the 5th Inning before the Warriors made it a 3-1 game in the 6th. The 7th and 8th Innings saw the Drovers’ advantage become 5-1 and then 6-1. Lewis-Clark State mustered just 1 more Run in the 9th for a final count of USAO 6  Warriors 2. Colton Williams was on the Mound for 9 Iron Man Innings for the victors.

tennessee wesleyan collegeDAY TWO, GAME TWO: The top seeds – the TENNESSEE WESLEYAN COLLEGE BULLDOGS – took on the 8th seeded INDIANA TECH WARRIORS (should be the Hoplites). By the 3rd Inning the Bulldogs had compiled an impressive 6-0 lead.

Tennessee Wesleyan College added another Run in each remaining at-bat while the Warriors could manage just 1 in the 6th Inning and 2 in the 9th. The Bulldogs won the game 11-3 behind Pitcher Cole Bellair. Continue reading →

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AMERICA’S QUASI- NAVAL WAR WITH FRANCE: 1798-1801

USS ConstellationMemorial Day Weekend rolls along with another topical post from Balladeer’s Blog. This one covers some naval actions from America’s undeclared, neither fish nor fowl, quasi-Naval War with France. Often called Stoddert’s War in reference to Benjamin Stoddert, America’s first Secretary of the Navy, this conflict was waged largely in the West Indies.

John Adams

John Adams

President John Adams wanted the infant United States Navy to protect American shipping in the West Indies from French vessels seizing our ships and sailors. The French Revolutionary government had adopted this policy to (in their view) “punish” the U.S. for not declaring war on France’s side in the Wars of the French Revolution.

Thus far America had remained neutral due to divided public opinion on the matter. Some voters felt the U.S. should join the war on the side of France but others felt that the current French Revolutionary government had overthrown, imprisoned and slain virtually all of the French figures who had aided America during our war against England, therefore negating any obligation on our part. (The paranoid French government had even jailed Thomas Paine when he visited the country.)

President John Adams later took great pride in keeping America out of an all-out land war. (Sentiment against France grew so strong that 80,000 men volunteered to serve against her. And don’t forget the rallying cry of “Millions for defense but not one cent for tribute!” following the X, Y and Z Affair.) Adams chose instead to act largely on defense by protecting our coastline, safeguarding U.S. shipping and expanding our Navy from three whole vessels (WOW!) to FIFTEEN.

Here are a few of the battles from this virtually unclassifiable conflict:

Stephen Decatur

U.S. Naval hero Stephen Decatur

JULY 7th, 1798: Off the New Jersey Coast, Captain Stephen Decatur, Sr led his 20-cannon Delaware against the 10-cannon French privateer craft La Croyable. The French vessel had just plundered the American merchant ship Alexander Hamilton. After a long chase and running fight La Croyable was seized by the Delaware. The French ship was renamed Retaliation and joined the growing U.S. Navy.

NOVEMBER 20th, 1798: Off Guadeloupe, the Retaliation (commanded now by William Bainbridge) ran afoul of two French vessels: the 40-cannon L’Insurgente and the 44-cannon Volontaire. The French opened fire and soon captured Retaliation, then imprisoned the crew in the hellish Basseterre Prison on St Kitts.   

FEBRUARY 9th, 1799: Nearly fifteen miles off the coast of the island of Nevis, American Captain Thomas “Terrible Tom” Truxton took his kickass nickname and his 36-cannon ship the Constellation into battle with the 40-cannon French vessel L’Insurgente. The battle began shortly after Noon and roughly two and a half hours later the French surrendered.     Continue reading →

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NCCAA WORLD SERIES SEMIFINALS PLUS NAIA DAY ONE RESULTS

NCCAA

Warner Royals logo 2FIRST SEMIFINAL: This game pitted the 3 seeds – the WARNER UNIVERSITY ROYALS – against the top seeded SOUTHWESTERN CHRISTIAN UNIVERSITY EAGLES. A 1-1 tie in the 1st Inning became a 3-2 Royals lead in the 3rd.

A huge 4th Inning for Warner University expanded their advantage to 7-2. From there the Eagles mustered just 1 more Run each in the 6th and 9th Innings while the Royals added 2 of their own in the 8th. Warner U won the game 9-4 behind Pitcher Joey Theune. Continue reading →

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