Monthly Archives: February 2017

KIRSTEN DUNST TURNS JAPANESE

Mascot FOUR original pics

Balladeer’s Blog

“What an eccentric performance” as they said in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Forget William Shatner singing Rocket Man, hell, you can even forget Tim Robbins singing Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds. And say goodbye to those twisted nightmares you had about Elton John playing Captain Kirk with Tim Robbins as Spock. 

 No, this is more like if Morgan Freeman sang Like A Virgin or Linda Hunt performed One Night in Bangkok. It’s the thoroughly bizarre – yet oddly arousing – music video of Kirsten Dunst singing the Vapors’ hit song Turning Japanese … while wearing a blue wig. 

11 Comments

Filed under Bad and weird movies

VICE PRESIDENTS – THE ULTIMATE SECOND BANANAS

John AdamsJohn Adams called the Vice Presidency “the most insignificant office that ever the invention of man contrived.” A very old joke went “Once there were two brothers. One ran away to sea and the other became Vice President. Neither was ever heard from again.”

In George S Kaufman’s and Morrie Ryskind’s classic stage work Of Thee I Sing one of the characters turns down an offer to be Vice President because he’s ashamed to have his mother know. He’s persuaded to accept the office when it’s pointed out that if he doesn’t tell her about it she’ll never find out.

The office has featured eminently forgettable figures as well as comic relief buffoons like Dan “The Global Village Idiot” Quayle and Joe “Koo Koo For Cocoa Puffs” Biden. In the light-hearted style of Balladeer’s Blog’s look at U.S. Presidents here’s a look at the men who got to hang around and see if the country’s Chief Executive wound up six feet under. I’m omitting VP’s who went on to actually become President, so no John Adams or Thomas Jefferson, etc. 

aaron-burrAARON BURR

Served Under: Jefferson 

Noted for: Shooting dead more Treasury Secretaries and hatching more plots to start his own country than any other Vice President. (So far, anyway.)

Best Burr Quote: “I’m still searching for the real killers of Alexander Hamilton.” 

GEORGE CLINTON

Served Under: Jefferson and Madison

Noted for: P-Funk and Funkadelic Leading American Rebel forces against the British troops of his loyalist cousin Sir Henry Clinton during the Revolutionary War.

Best Clinton Quote: “Do fries go with that shake?”

Elbridge GerryELBRIDGE GERRY

Served Under: Madison

Noted for: Pioneering the method of “Gerrymandering” political districts in a way that the modern day Democrats and Republicans have raised to a mainstay in the world of white collar crime which they inhabit. Continue reading

20 Comments

Filed under Neglected History

COOL-NAMED SPORTS TEAM: ACADEMY OF ART

ACADEMY OF ART URBAN KNIGHTS

Location: San Francisco, CA

Division: NCAA Division Two

Conference Affiliation: Pacific West Conference

Comment: You’d expect an academy of art to have an incredibly eye-catching logo like this but this institution takes things to the Nth degree by also having an unbelievably cool nickname for its sports teams.

Bonus: I was torn between which Urban Knights logo to use so I’ll just go ahead and use both. Behold: Continue reading

16 Comments

Filed under Cool names and cool logos

DOG LOVERS: BREED COMPATIBILITY

I recently came across this breed compatibility graphic created by a company called PuppySpot. They are a community of dog lovers whose missions is to make lives better by placing healthy puppies into happy homes. They believe that dogs should be celebrated and owners deserve to experience trust, confidence and transparency when searching for their new companions. They take pride in their No Puppy Mill Promise and have a zero tolerance for puppy mills or substandard breeding practices of any kind. Check out their cute puppies for sale –
Continue reading

12 Comments

Filed under dogs

AND STILL ANOTHER FORMER LIBERAL SPEAKS OUT ON WHY HE GOT FED UP

why-i-left-the-leftTo give readers a break from my blog posts about how much contempt I’ve come to feel for the political left that I used to be a part of, I periodically post these articles about others who have come to feel the same way.

In this case it’s Dave Rubin of The Rubin Report fame. The link to the full item is below. First some excerpts:  

“Do you believe in free speech?

“Do you believe that people should be judged by their character, not their skin color?

“Do you believe in freedom of religion?

“If you believe these things, you’re probably not a progressive. You might think you’re a progressive. I used to think I was. My show, The Rubin Report, was originally part of the progressive The Young Turks network.

rubin-report“Progressives used to say, “I may disagree with what you say, but I will fight to the death for your right to say it.” Not anymore.

“Banning speakers whose opinions you don’t agree with from college campuses – that’s not progressive.

“Prohibiting any words not approved of as ‘politically correct’ that’s not progressive.

“Putting ‘Trigger Warnings’ on books, movies, music, anything that might offend people – that’s not progressive either.

“All of this has led me to be believe that much of the Left is no longer progressive, but regressive. This is one of the reasons I’ve spent so much time on my show talking about The Regressive Left. Continue reading

4 Comments

Filed under LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, Neglected History, opinion

THE TOP MOVIES OF SHINYA TSUKAMOTO

tetsuo-bDirector Shinya Tsukamoto hails from Japan and is noted for his surreal, nightmarish excursions into the darker side of transformative  industrial technology … especially any technology that impacts the human anatomy.

Tsukamoto’s noteworthy films include:

tetsuoTetsuo: The Iron Man (1989) – From the early shots of a man removing one of his own bones and replacing it with a piece of metal viewers knew this was a work of true genius. Tetsuo becomes more and more relevant by the year, especially with the advent of nanotechnology and its potentially invasive effect on the human mind and body.

The anatomies of the film’s characters become distorted and mutate into metal figures that challenge preconceived notions of beauty, ugliness, gender and even what constitutes life. Continue reading

Leave a comment

Filed under Bad and weird movies

THE CROSS OF BLOOD LOCATED

cross-of-bloodThank you to all the Balladeer’s Blog readers who let me know where to lay my hands on a French copy of The Cross of Blood (1941), one of the Nyctalope novels I had not yet been able to track down.

I have ordered it and will post a review after I get a chance to read it.

For my take on many of the other adventures of France’s cyborg Pulp Hero the Nyctalope CLICK HERE  Continue reading

2 Comments

Filed under Pulp Heroes

A HERO AND HEROINE OF COLOR

Mascot with demo and repub heads

Balladeer’s Blog often covers the jumbling and shuffling going on in American politics right now. Bernie Sanders and Donald Trump’s candidacies last year made it the first campaign season in a very long time in which the REAL issues that the VOTERS care about got discussed. Here are two more courageous people declaring their independence from traditional DemCorp and RepubCorp politics:

tim-scottTIM SCOTT – Senator Scott (R) from SC took to the Senate floor to discuss the way that freethinking African-Americans like himself get treated by DemoKKKrats for not obeying them like Barack Obama always did:

“The liberal left that speaks and desires for all of us to be tolerant, do not want to be tolerant of anyone that disagrees with where they are coming from,” Scott said. “So the definition of tolerance is not that all Americans experience a high level of tolerance, it is that all Americans who agree with [the left] experiences this so-called tolerance.”

Senator Scott also embarrassed the Senate DemoKKKrats by pointing out that, despite DemCorp’s constant talk of “diversity” that it’s actually the Senate Republicans that have diverse staffs, not the Democrats. Scott has a black chief of staff, which is a rarity among Senate Democrats. He also mentioned it in his remarks.

“My chief of staff, the only — until three weeks ago, the only African-American chief of staff in the United States Senate out of 100 is the chief of staff for a Republican,” he said. “The second African-American chief of staff in the United States Senate is also the chief of staff of a Republican.”

And I will once again point out that the Democrats are the party of slavery, the Ku Klux Klan, lynching, the Dred Scott Decision, and Jim Crow laws yet Democrats feel that their political party can simply say “Well, that was long ago. We’re better people now. But THE REST OF YOU AMERICANS bear collective guilt about slavery in perpetuity.”

No, DemoKKKrats, if your party can put those things behind you so can the rest of us. After all, your political party is THE ONE REMAINING INSTITUTION most associated with those racial outrages. Quit trying to lecture the rest of us about what YOUR POLITICAL PARTY was responsible for.

You want to REALLY “bury the racist past?” THEN CHANGE THE NAME AND SYMBOL OF YOUR POLITICAL PARTY! Continue reading

Leave a comment

Filed under LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, Neglected History

COLLEGE BASKETBALL RANKINGS: FEBRUARY 14th

 

christopher newport universityDivision Three

1. CHRISTOPHER NEWPORT UNIVERSITY CAPTAINS    ###     2. BABSON COLLEGE BEAVERS    ###    3. RAMAPO COLLEGE ROADRUNNERS    ###    4. SALISBURY UNIVERSITY SEA GULLS    ###    5. TUFTS UNIVERSITY JUMBOS    ###

marietta pioneers_logo6. MARIETTA COLLEGE PIONEERS    ###     7. SAINT NORBERT COLLEGE GREEN KNIGHTS    ###     8. SUSQUEHANNA UNIVERSITY RIVER HAWKS    ###    9. HOPE COLLEGE FLYING DUTCHMEN    ###      10. UNIVERSITY OF WISCONSIN AT WHITEWATER WARHAWKS    ###    

***      Continue reading

Leave a comment

Filed under College Basketball

SONGS OF MALDOROR: CANTO FOUR GUIDE

Back to Balladeer’s Blog’s chapter guide to my examination of Isidore Ducasse’s 1868 work of surreal horror The Songs of Maldoror.

FOURTH CANTO

Maldoror 4 1 denderaFourth Canto, Stanza 1: PRELUDE TO A PRIVATE ARMAGEDDON – At Dendera in Egypt Maldoror recalls his past visits to the city and foresees a future day when he will battle all of the Earth’s armies in that same location. CLICK HERE 

Fourth Canto, Stanza 2: THE MARRIAGE OF PROVERBS AND METAPHORS – Maldoror becomes lost in the Valley of Unreality where literal reality and metaphorical reality overlap. All that plus esoteric reflections on ancient meditation practices intended to unleash one’s astral body. CLICK HERE 

Fourth Canto, Stanza 3: THE TORMENTED MAN – While watching a man getting tortured by his own wife and mother Maldoror reflects on various atrocities of his own. CLICK HERE Continue reading

Leave a comment

Filed under Maldoror