It’s Presidents Day Weekend! Three days of basketball and being reminded about how the Democratic and Republican Parties stick us with pieces of garbage like Barack Obama and George W Bush. Here are some takes on the more recent presidents.
Character Type: Well-meaning but befuddled sitcom grandfather.
Military Service: World War One and World War Two
Motto: “FOOORE!” (Remember, the traditional cry as you’re teeing off in golf? Oh, never mind!)
Nickname: Uncle Milty
Pro: Knew enough to distrust Richard Nixon long before it became the national pasttime.
Con: Was the first president to pronounce nuclear as “nucular”.
JOHN F KENNEDY
Character Type: Rich playboy who disdained both Liberals and Conservatives and played by his own rules.
Military Service: World War Two
Motto: “Thank God for television!”
Pro: The man was shrewd enough to distrust both liberals and conservatives equally. I can’t praise that attitude highly enough given our present circumstances.
Con: Continue reading
John Adams called the Vice Presidency “the most insignificant office that ever the invention of man contrived.” A very old joke went “Once there were two brothers. One ran away to sea and the other became Vice President. Neither was ever heard from again.”
In George S Kaufman’s and Morrie Ryskind’s classic stage work Of Thee I Sing one of the characters turns down an offer to be Vice President because he’s ashamed to have his mother know. He’s persuaded to accept the office when it’s pointed out that if he doesn’t tell her about it she’ll never find out.
The office has featured eminently forgettable figures as well as comic relief buffoons like Dan “The Global Village Idiot” Quayle and Joe “Koo Koo For Cocoa Puffs” Biden. In the light-hearted style of Balladeer’s Blog’s look at U.S. Presidents here’s a look at the men who got to hang around and see if the country’s Chief Executive wound up six feet under. I’m omitting VP’s who went on to actually become President, so no John Adams or Thomas Jefferson, etc. Happy Presidents Day Weekend!
Served Under: Jefferson
Noted for: Shooting dead more Treasury Secretaries and hatching more plots to start his own country than any other Vice President. (So far, anyway.)
Best Burr Quote: “I’m still searching for the real killers of Alexander Hamilton.”
Served Under: Jefferson and Madison
P-Funk and Funkadelic Leading American Rebel forces against the British troops of his loyalist cousin Sir Henry Clinton during the Revolutionary War.
Best Clinton Quote: “Do fries go with that shake?”
Served Under: Madison
Noted for: Pioneering the method of “Gerrymandering” political districts in a way that the modern day Democrats and Republicans have raised to a mainstay in the world of white collar crime which they inhabit.
Best Gerry Quote: “I’ll be immortalized as the man who invented Elbridge-mandering!”
DANIEL D TOMPKINS
Served Under: Monroe Continue reading
Year-End lists continue with this look at 2016’s top posts about Barack Obama.
OBAMA: THE MOST UNFIT PRESIDENT EVER – HERE
OBAMA AND PUTIN – HERE
OBAMA ON THE ORLANDO ATTACK – HERE
OBAMA: IF IT SAVES EVEN ONE LIFE – HERE
THIS BUFFOON IS LIVING PROOF WHY WE NEED THIRD PARTIES.
BARACK OBAMA: VILLAGE IDIOT – HERE
OBAMA LEGACY – HERE
MY INTERVIEW WITH OBAMA – HERE
BARACK OBAMA APOLOGIZES – HERE
OBAMA SLAPPED BY SUPREME COURT AGAIN – HERE
OBAMA: MORON OR IMBECILE? – HERE
OBAMA & ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS – HERE
OBAMA ON MERIT – HERE
THE OBAMACARE DEBACLE – HERE
OBAMA & POLICE SHOOTINGS – HERE
OBAMA’S “CHECKERS” SPEECH – HERE
OBAMA SETS BACK RACE RELATIONS – HERE
BARACK OBAMA: THE KARDASHIAN PRESIDENCY – HERE Continue reading
Obama at his most presidential
Balladeer’s Blog is still the only site on the web that criticizes both Liberals and Conservatives equally. When innocent people get killed by Muslim terrorists Barack Obama’s response is to lecture the nation whose diverse people elected him twice about what disgusting bigots he and his fellow pompous asses consider Americans to be. This weak and pathetic little man even says “ISIL” instead of “ISIS” just to grovel for Muslim fanatics who prefer the acronym “ISIL”.
Obama’s creation of the Islamic State through his premature withdrawal from Iraq and his general “masochism as foreign policy” approach inspired this look at how this worst of all presidents might have handled the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor on December 7th, 1941.
The confused, uncomprehending face of utter incompetence.
For starters Barack “Eddie Haskell” Obama would have claimed the attack was “Fake News” and would have been too busy with golfing, fundraisers and tentative spin doctoring to even address the nation until sometime around January 24th, 1942. And that’s being optimistic.
” My fellow Americans, I speak to you today as a special guest on the Fibber McGee and Molly radio show. I am addressing you this evening about the recent incident in which America’s usual imperial and dictatorial behavior provoked the innocent nation of Japan, home of Shinto, the Religion of Peace, to act in their own defense by conducting a few military exercises in the Hawaiian Islands. Continue reading
A variety of colorful figures have served as Secretaries of State. Many of them may not be household names here in the 21st Century but they would definitely stand out on any staff. Here is an examination of sixteen such figures in chronological order.
1. TIMOTHY PICKERING (1795-1800)
Served under: Presidents George Washington and John Adams
Noted for: Conspiring with Alexander Hamilton to undermine some of the policies of the Washington and Adams administrations. When Adams discovered this he ordered Pickering to resign, but Pickering refused, forcing Adams to fire him. Pickering remains the only Secretary of State to officially be fired by the President.
2. HENRY CLAY (1825-1829)
Served under: President John Quincy Adams
Noted for: Fighting a duel with Continue reading
The Fourth of July is rapidly approaching! Some people get puzzled about the actual Thirteen Original Colonies of America. They know for instance that Daniel Morgan’s Kentucky Rifles were one of the most storied units of the war and saw action from Canada to the American South. Yet, Kentucky is not listed as one of the original colonies.
Similarly they know that Ethan Allen and his Green Mountain Boys were a Vermont unit and that Chillicothe in Ohio was the site of the REAL last battle of the war, yet neither Vermont nor Ohio were original colonies, either. The reason for all that is this: Continue reading