Tag Archives: Balladeer’s Blog

February 14, 2016 · 12:25 am

U.S. PRESIDENTS FROM EISENHOWER TO OBAMA

It’s President’s Day Weekend! Three days of basketball and being reminded about how the Democratic and Republican Parties stick us with pieces of garbage like Barack Obama and George W Bush. Here are some pros and cons of the more recent presidents.  

Eisenhower34. DWIGHT EISENHOWER – Motto: “FOOORE!” (Remember, the traditional cry as you’re teeing off in golf? Oh, never mind!)

Nickname: Uncle Milty

Pro: Knew enough to distrust Richard Nixon long before it became the national pasttime. 

Con: Was the first president to pronounce nuclear as “nucular”.

35. JOHN F KENNEDY – Motto: “Thank God for television!”

Nickname: FDR  

Pro: The man was shrewd enough to distrust both liberals and conservatives equally. 

Con: Continue reading →

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February 13, 2016 · 4:53 pm

PELE AND HI’IAKA: EPIC OF HAWAII PART SEVEN

hiloBalladeer’s Blog continues its examination of the grand and exciting Hawaiian epic about the goddesses Pele and Hi’iaka.

PART SEVEN

Hi’iaka, the fern goddess Pa’u’o’pala’e and the mortal woman Wahine arrived near Hilo. A very rickety bridge across a broad chasm seemed the only available path over the Wailuka River far below. The bridge was erected and guarded by Piliamo’o and Nohoamo’o, two evil sorcerors who had so thoroughly mastered dark magic that they had achieved partial godhood.      

Regarded as actual deities by the locals, the sorcerors extorted valuables from the people who lived near Hilo and from anyone else attempting to cross their bridge. If anyone refused to pay the pair of sorcerors the price they demanded then the evildoers would cause one of the planks in the bridge to give way during crossing, plunging the victim to their death on the jagged rocks far below. Continue reading →

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February 13, 2016 · 2:40 pm

SUPER PRESIDENT: FORGOTTEN TELEVISION

superpresident

Super President

Since it’s President’s Day holiday time here’s a look at a long- neglected television series.

SUPER PRESIDENT was an actual cartoon series from the 1960’s that has virtually disappeared. It’s rare to catch a glimpse of this DePatie- Freleng show anywhere or even to find people who have heard of it outside of oddballs like me.

This cartoon was not intended for laughs, like it would be today. It honestly featured a superhero whose “secret identity” was being President of the United States. First off, there’s the absurd fun of the name AND the fact that calling yourself Super President instantly blows your cover anyway, unless you think people are dumb enough to not figure out what you’re the president OF. (The Teamsters Union? The National Egg Council?)  

President James Norcross was our title superhero and like the Fantastic Four a half-dozen years earlier got his powers from a cosmic ray storm. He had super-strength, could fly via small rockets on his belt and as the topper could transform himself into any substance – steel, granite, water, electricity and on more than one occassion – “ozone”. (Ozone?) Super President also had a nifty Omnicar that could drive, fly and serve as a submarine. The Omnicar was stashed in a secret room in the White House that served as SP’s version of the Batcave (How was this addition to the White House added without attracting attention and how much did it cost?). Continue reading →

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February 12, 2016 · 1:52 am

LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES AND ART

Mascot with demo and repub heads

The symbol of the nonexistent Balladeer Political Party

LIBERALS –

American Liberals have become incapable of appreciating art and literature. Instead they pompously and intolerantly dissect ancient works of visual and written art looking for nothing but (yawn) racism, sexism, white privilege, colonial narratives, “the male gaze” and all their other paranoid obsessions.

They have no appreciation for beauty in any form. American Liberals have no identity outside of their political opinions so when they ponder the magnificent creations of past geniuses they use it as an excuse to pat themselves on the back about how much more “enlightened” they consider themselves to be than the brilliant people who created those works.  

Jesus says libs and cons both suckIt’s a very empty way to view the past and it’s also pointless. It’s only natural that people living in different time periods separated by a few hundred or a few thousand years WILL HAVE VERY DIFFERENT NOTIONS OF RIGHT AND WRONG.

And y’know what, Liberal snobs? People centuries from now will look back on YOUR value system and condemn it for not being the same as theirs. Do you really care if – long after you’re dead – pompous jackasses just like you sit around, sip wine and repeatedly reassure each other that they are morally superior to you?

CONSERVATIVES – Continue reading →

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February 11, 2016 · 11:17 pm

THE NINJA GOD EN NO OZUNU

En No OzunuRegular readers of Balladeer’s Blog know that I consider all religions to be mythology, which people are usually fine with unless it’s their own personal religion I’m examining. At any rate En No Ozunu is revered as the founder and most active mythical figure in the belief system called Shugendo, and in some offshoot cults of Shugendo as a virtual patron deity of ninja practices and ancient weather forecasting.

Practitioners of the Shugendo faith are called Yamabushi and their belief system fuses elements of Shinto, Ainu, Buddhism and Taoism along with features of shamanism and the ancient Japanese reverence for mountains, all of which are considered sacred ground in Shugendo.

The ninja connection is very big in popular culture but actually the Ainu are more technically the originators of many ninjutsu practices. For an even bigger pop culture tie-in there are versions of the En No Ozunu myth in which he is the father of Sadako (Neil Sadako?), the female figure in the Ringu novel plus its Japanese and American film adaptations. 

En No Ozunu supposedly began his existence on Earth when he was born to a mortal woman who was Continue reading →

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February 10, 2016 · 11:07 pm

PELE AND HI’IAKA: EPIC OF HAWAII PART SIX

Hawaii WaimanuBalladeer’s Blog continues its examination of the grand and exciting Hawaiian epic about the goddesses Pele and Hi’iaka.

PART SIX

Fresh off her destruction of the gigantic shark-monster Maka’ukui, Hi’iaka led her two companions – the fern goddess Pa’u’o’pala’e and the mortal woman Wahine – as they renewed their quest to reach Kauai. 

Their path next led them into the jungle around Waimanu where the monstrous creatures called the Mahiki terrorized the vicinity. The Mahiki were lizard-like creatures the size of horses and had legs like grasshoppers. These monsters could leap long distances to attack their prey, but had full human consciousness.    Continue reading →

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February 9, 2016 · 10:41 pm

COLLEGE BASKETBALL RANKINGS

Lincoln Memorial University RailsplittersNCAA Division Two – 1. LINCOLN MEMORIAL UNIVERSITY RAILSPLITTERS     ###    2. WEST LIBERTY STATE HILLTOPPERS     ###    3. WESTERN OREGON UNIVERSITY WOLVES     ###    4. AUGUSTANA (SD) VIKINGS     ###    5. QUEEN’S UNIVERSITY OF CHARLOTTE ROYALS     ###     Continue reading →

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February 8, 2016 · 10:23 pm

COOL-NAMED SPORTS TEAM: MU-MIDDLETOWN

Miami University Middleton ThunderhawksMIAMI UNIVERSITY AT MIDDLETOWN THUNDERHAWKS

Location: Middletown, OH

Conference Affiliation: Ohio Regional Conference

Comment: Thunderhawks is one incredibly butt-kicking team name, especially compared to the overused names like Eagles, Tigers, Bulldogs and Wildcats. Continue reading →

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February 8, 2016 · 12:03 am

YES, THE FILM CHI-RAQ IS BASED ON LYSISTRATA

AristophanesMany of you have been kind enough to let me know that the new movie Chi-Raq, about black-on- black violence in Chicago, can be added to the long list of adaptations of Lysistrata by Aristophanes.

For new readers here is my examination of Lysistrata:

Lysistrata was written by the Big A himself, Aristophanes, and this comedy always makes a perfect introductory play for newcomers to Ancient Greek Comedy (henceforth AGC). Part of its accessibility to modern audiences obviously comes from the risque premise of the play, of course.

For me the notion that we can understand and laugh at the same simplistic but brilliant story that Athenian audiences from 2,427 years ago laughed at and appreciated embodies the value of these ancient works. 

THE PREMISE

Lysistrata1By 411 BCE the Peloponnesian War between Athens (and its allied city-states) and Sparta (and its allied city-states) had been raging for roughly 20 years. The war provides the backdrop for many of Aristophanes’ surviving comedies and is especially apt where Lysistrata is concerned.   

Weary of the long, drawn-out conflict the women of Athens, led by the title character Lysistrata (supposedly based on Lysimache, the Priestess of Athena in Athens at the time), join forces with the women of Sparta and decide to withhold sex from the men until they agree to bring an end to the war.  Continue reading →

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February 7, 2016 · 4:27 pm

COLLEGE BASKETBALL RESULTS: USCAA

Spalding Golden EaglesNUMBER SEVEN TAKES A FALL – The SPALDING UNIVERSITY GOLDEN EAGLES hosted the 7th ranked IOWA WESLEYAN UNIVERSITY TIGERS yesterday. The Golden Eagles had built up a nice 40-28 lead by Halftime and then went on to win the game in a 78-56 stunner. Brandon Goeing led Spalding University with 26 points.

Miami_University_HamiltonCENTURY CLUB – Teams scoring 100 or more points in Regulation: The MIAMI (OH) AT HAMILTON HARRIERS notched a 100-78 road rout over the SOUTHERN STATE PATRIOTS    ***    The SOUTHERN MAINE SEAWOLVES topped their hosts the UNIVERSITY OF MAINE AT MACHIAS CLIPPERS 102-92    ###    And the HUSTON-TILLOTSON UNIVERSITY RAMS obliterated the PAUL QUINN COLLEGE TIGERS to the tune of 123-62.   Continue reading →

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