Tag Archives: Mitt Romney

MITT ROMNEY AND I ANNOUNCE WE’RE NOT RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT

Mitt Romney

*** *** *** *** *** *** Not even the endorsement of Senor Wences could help the pathetic Mitt Romney.

The dual announcement shocked the nation … if by shocked you mean “had absolutely no impact whatsoever on the 2016 presidential race” or “you’d need an electron microscope to measure public reaction.”

I outdid Mitt “The Mormon Mondale” Romney by also announcing that I would NOT accept an appointment to fill the vacancy on the U.S. Supreme Court, NOR will I accept an offer to become the next actor to play Indiana Jones.

Reaching my hands across the water I made it abundantly clear that I will NOT agree to be the next star of Doctor Who either. The public be damned – I have to think of myself and my loved ones.  

Anyway, since Mitt decided he wanted a slightly larger footnote in American history, I got in the mood for my Mock Campaign Slogans for him and Obama from 2012. Here they are one last time for nostalgia’s sake. 

Barack Obama: If shallow, uninformed and emotionally unstable entertainers think he’s fit to govern the nation who are YOU to question their judgement?

Barack Obama: All the ineptitude of Jimmy Carter … all the corruption of Richard Nixon.

Barack Obama: Because the problems of the 21st Century call for 1960s solutions.

Barack Obama: Continue reading

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Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES

LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES AND OVERREACTING TO ELECTION RESULTS

Two fools who prove that ANYBODY can get reelected and it doesn’t prove they are competent.

Welcome back to the favorite site of Independent Voters, Balladeer’s Blog, the only site on the web that criticizes Liberal fanatics and Conservative fanatics equally. The 2012 election is finally over and the Democratic candidate who belongs to billionaires defeated the Republican candidate who belongs to billionaires.

Part of the fun involved in the week following any election is laughing at the ENORMOUS overreaction of Liberals and Conservatives to the outcome. The winning side will claim a “mandate”, no matter how slender their lead in the popular vote, and this year it was only a few million votes. Not the least bit impressive in a country this size, is it? Especially not for a president who LOST millions of votes from 2008. The losing side will wail and gnash their teeth and pretend the outcome proves that the voters are “stupid” (pretentious Liberal asses) or “Communist” (nationalist Conservative asses).

As an Independent Voter here in the United States you get to see this all the time. In 2004 when the detestable George W Bush was reelected American Conservatives were pretending it meant he “was a great president” and that he’d been “vindicated by history.” It meant no such thing of course and the fact that little Barry “The Destroyer of The Economy” Obama got reelected also does not mean he’s been Continue reading

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Filed under LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES

MOCK DEFINITIONS OF LIBERAL AND CONSERVATIVE TERMS

“If I get reelected I want YOUR take-home pay to be reduced so drastically that you have trouble making ends meet while my cronies and I remain rich from plundering the public treasury! Sucks to be YOU losers!”

Welcome back to the favorite site of Independent Voters, Balladeer’s Blog, as always coming to you from an America where every single news outlet slants its coverage in order to pander to either Liberals or Conservatives. Tonight is this year’s first presidential debate between the usual partisan fools the Democratic and Republican Parties always inflict on the voters. Needless to say, both of them are rich and are children of privilege who have nothing in common with the rest of us. 

As a public service to the rest of us Balladeer’s Blog presents a handy guide to the political terms most frequently used by Liberal fanatics and Conservative fanatics and what those terms REALLY mean. Here they are, in no particular order: 

BARACK OBAMA – An Continue reading

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Filed under LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES

MOCK CAMPAIGN SLOGANS FOR OBAMA AND ROMNEY, COURTESY OF BALLADEER’S BLOG

Two children of privilege who have nothing in common with the rest of us.

Welcome back to the favorite site of Independent Voters, Balladeer’s Blog, as always coming to you from an America stuck with the usual lame partisan fools that the Democratic and Republican Parties will go on sticking us with because of their monopolistic hold on our political system. This year the Democrats are trying to reelect the weak, inept and crooked little man named Barack Obama while the Republicans, rising to the challenge of coming up with a candidate as laughable as Obama, went with the man I like to call “the Republican Walter Mondale” – Mitt Romney.

Since Balladeer’s Blog remains the only site on the web that trashes both Liberal fools and Conservative fools equally I feel uniquely qualified to offer up some campaign slogans for these two repulsive figures. First up I’ll deal with Obama since he’s the incumbent felon, then I’ll handle Romney.

Barack Obama: If shallow, uninformed and emotionally unstable entertainers think he’s fit to govern the nation who are YOU to question their judgement?

Barack Obama: He’ll shrink your take-home pay until you have trouble making ends meet or die trying!

Barack Obama: All the ineptitude of Jimmy Carter … all the corruption of Richard Nixon.

Barack Obama: Because the problems of the 21st Century call for 1960’s solutions.

Barack Obama: Continue reading

55 Comments

Filed under LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES

SOPTIC TANK: OBAMA SLITHERS EVEN LOWER THAN RICHARD NIXON EVER DID

There’s a reason his initials are B.O.

Obama has shown once again that he is determined to be remembered in one breath with sleazy presidents like Republicans Richard Nixon and Warren G Harding.

Regular readers of Balladeer’s Blog know that I am an Independent Voter who criticizes both Liberal fools and Conservative fools equally and that I show no respect for any presidents of either party. (If you don’t believe me read my President’s Day look at all the men who have stayed one step ahead of the law while holding that office. )

Continue reading

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Filed under LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion

IT’S FUN WATCHING REPUBLICANS REALIZE THEIR BASE IS INSANE ENOUGH TO VOTE FOR NEWT GINGRICH

 While most people today are talking about Rick Santorum’s rout of Mitt Romney AKA The Republican Walter Mondale,  Balladeer’s Blog’s readers know I always like to be different.

Today I’ll post about the enormous laughs I’ve been getting from watching the GOP brass fume over the realization that their voters are crazy enough to vote for Newt Gingrich, a man who never met a goofy idea he didn’t want to ride for awhile before abandoning it and denying he ever had anything to do with it. What a “rock solid conservative” those nutty Tea Party types are supporting! What a way to prove people wrong when they say Tea Party voters are clueless hicks who never follow national events and have no historical memory!

If the Newtons, as Gingrich’s cult-like followers are called, manage to make their man the nominee I’ve decided to offer up a few potential campaign slogans for the candidate.

Newt Gingrich: The bitter, scowling face of the Republican Party!

Newt Gingrich: Continue reading

22 Comments

Filed under opinion