Category Archives: opinion

ABRAHAM LINCOLN AND HARRY FLASHMAN

abraham-lincoln-pictureBalladeer’s Blog’s recent look at my Top Five Harry Flashman Novels was a hit. Combine that with the upcoming Presidents Day Holiday on Monday and let’s take a look at one of the other Flashman novels for future president Abe Lincoln’s interactions with George MacDonald Fraser’s infamous antihero Harry Flashman.

In 1971’s Flash for Freedom, set in the second half of 1848 and early 1849, one of the historical figures that Harry encounters is the young Abraham Lincoln when Abe was just a Congressman. Flashman himself – like Lincoln – has not yet achieved the fame that will be his in later life.

Alan Bates -better Flashman than MalcolmThe pair first meet in the fall of 1848 in Washington, DC, when Harry – a Cavalry Captain in Queen Victoria’s army – is trying, Bret Maverick-style, to pass himself off as a Royal Navy Lieutenant named Beauchamp Comber. (Don’t ask.) Abe senses something off about the scurvy Brit and uses seeming politeness mixed with alarming insinuations to set Flashman on edge, terrified that he’ll be exposed.

The author George MacDonald Fraser handles this section very cleverly as Lincoln comes across like a homespun Sherlock Holmes, chewing up Harry’s lies and spitting them out on the b.s. pile. Harry/ Beauchamp counters with an observation that Abe isn’t entirely on the level, either, masking his obviously calculating nature behind a facade of folksiness.

The two part on reasonably friendly terms, but Lincoln smilingly makes it clear that he knows Flashman/  Comber is conning everyone about being a naval officer. However, Abe also makes it clear that whatever the rascal is up to it doesn’t seem to pose any harm to him, so he shrugs it off and goes on his merry way. 

The second meeting between the future President and the future Sir Harry comes in the very early months of 1849 in the novel’s thrilling finale. A convoluted set of circumstances have led to Lincoln being at just the right place at just the right time to face down a pack of Fugitive Slave Hunters in order to save Harry and a female slave that Flashman is smuggling to freedom in Canada. 

Flash for FreedomThe next day a bedridden Harry is recovering from wounds received during this adventure. He’s staying at the home of an acquaintance of Lincoln, and Abe has been visiting the ailing Englishman, sitting in a bedside chair. They’ve had a lengthy conversation during which Lincoln has made it clear that he now knows who Harry really is and Flashman asks why Abe continues to cover for him.

By way of an answer Lincoln muses aloud about the various newsworthy escapades that “Beauchamp Comber” has been having as a reluctant agent of the Underground Railroad. He also recaps the number of former slaves that Flashman has incidentally helped recently during his usual selfish pursuits. We join the narrative as Abe sums up:

“I don’t pretend to know why you’ve done these things and I don’t think I want to know. It’s enough for me to know that you HAVE done them, and that none of those unfortunates will ever wear chains again.”   

I started to make with the kind of simperingly compassionate noises that I thought would appeal to a man like Lincoln but he stopped me short with a raised hand and a wry smile before saying “Save it for the Recording Angel, Captain Flashman. I have a feeling you’ll need it on that day.” Continue reading →

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DEMOCRATS: WILL THEY EVER GROW UP?

Mascot with demo and repub headsFirst off, I’ll point out again that I think the Democrats (DemCorp) and Republicans (RepubCorp) are both gangs of white collar criminals. However, there is no shortage of outlets pointing out the faults of just the Republicans, even though Democrats are just as disgusting.

Democrats are in SERIOUS need of introspection and soul-searching, yet refuse to venture out of the pompous haze of self-infatuation that they wrap themselves in 24 hours a day. THEY are the 21st Century’s “Ugly Americans” who prance along oblivious to all of their faults while fancying themselves to be THE moral models for the rest of us. 

Over the past year I’ve been making a point of emphasizing the way that so many of the negative aspects of our history were caused by Democrats and how they need knocked down a few pegs when they dare try to elevate themselves above the rest of the country and lecture us.

They claim all of us bear guilt just for being Americans yet seem to think THEY can dismiss their political party’s role in slavery, Jim Crow, the Ku Klux Klan, the Japanese Internment, the Trail of Tears, etc. One way they do that is by saying “Hey, that was long ago. We’re better people now.” Well if that applies to Democrats it applies to the country as a whole, too.

Another way they do it is through their ridiculous claim that “Hey, uh … all those Democrats of the past? Uh, they would be Republicans now … Yeah, that’s the ticket …” When I was still a Democrat I often mouthed those same words. I was wrong and so are any other Democrats who hide behind that lame excuse.

We are long past the time when America’s pompous, pretentious asses called Democrats need to be called out on their ridiculous airs. Transgress with me as I dare to blaspheme against the Democrats’ most sacred deities – Themselves: 

*** GROW UP, ALREADY! YOUR PERCEPTIONS HAVE BECOME NOTHING MORE THAN WISH FULFILLMENT OR DELUSIONS TO STROKE YOUR OWN EGOS AND TELL YOURSELVES HOW WONDERFUL YOU CONSIDER YOURSELVES TO BE. (Over and over again, too, until you become unbearable. Then when you drive people away you despairingly moan how you think  everyone you know is becoming right-wing.) 

*** FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIVES THINK ABOUT HOW CHILDISH YOU SOUND WHEN YOU SPOUT THAT NONSENSICAL EXCUSE ABOUT DEMOCRATS OF THE PAST. YOU ARE BASICALLY SAYING “ALL THE ‘GOOD’ PEOPLE IN HISTORY WOULD BE DEMOCRATS TODAY AND ALL THE ‘BAD’ AND ‘ICKY’ PEOPLE IN HISTORY WOULD BE REPUBLICANS TODAY.”

*** YOU HAVE A SIMPLE-MINDED, COMIC BOOK-LEVEL WORLDVIEW IN WHICH LIFE IS A CHILDISH FANTASY ABOUT GOOD GUYS AND BAD GUYS WITH YOURSELVES CONSTANTLY PAINTED AS THE GOOD GUYS AND EVERYONE WHO DISAGREES WITH YOU AS THE BAD GUYS.

*** YOU INSIST ON CASTING ALL OTHER ADULTS AS SUPPORTING PLAYERS IN YOUR INCREASINGLY JUVENILE DRAMAS, WITH YOU AS THE CORRECT-THINKER SETTING STRAIGHT THE VILLAINS OF THE PIECE.

*** AND IT ISN’T JUST THAT YOU PERPETUAL CHILDREN CAST EVERYONE ELSE AS SUPPORTING PLAYERS IN THOSE DRAMAS, IT’S THAT YOUR LIMITED IMAGINATIONS CAN ONLY CONJURE UP SUCH FOURTH-RATE DRAMAS.

*** I AM TELLING YOU UNEQUIVOCALLY THAT MANY REPUBLICANS, OR RIGHT-WINGERS, OR INDEPENDENT VOTERS OR TRUMP SUPPORTERS REALLY ARE AS TOLERANT, INTELLIGENT AND COMPASSIONATE AS YOU EGOMANIACS ONLY THINK YOU ARE.

*** THE DOGMATIC ASSERTIONS THAT YOU TRY TO PUMMEL THE REST OF US WITH ARE NOT FACTS AND JUST BECAUSE YOU CAN SUMMON EQUALLY SMALL-MINDED PEOPLE (or maybe just sock puppets) WHO AGREE WITH YOU DOES NOT MAKE THEM FACTS. THEY ARE STILL NOTHING MORE THAN ASSERTIONS SHARED BY A CERTAIN NUMBER OF PEOPLE.

*** YOUR PERCEPTIONS MIGHT BETTER BE DESCRIBED AS JUST AN EXERCISE IN WISH FULFILLMENT OR PROPS FOR YOUR SIMPLISTIC WORLDVIEW IN WHICH YOU ARE “GOOD” AND EVERYONE WHO DISAGREES WITH YOU IS “EVIL.” (As if such childish concepts belong anywhere outside of religion.) Continue reading →

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BILLY JOEL: STILETTO

Another installment of Give Them A Shoutout Before They’re Dead with Billy Joel as the subject. Here’s his 1978 anthem to wicked women – Stiletto.

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SEX AND POLITICS: FEBRUARY 12th

Adam SchiffADAM SCHIFF the ranking DEMOCRAT on the House Intelligence (as in spying) Committee, wins this month’s DUMBER THAN JIMMY KIMMEL AWARD. Schiff got punked by Russian comedians awhile back because this actual elected representative is so unhinged when it comes to the groundless Trump-Russia Collusion scam.

Schiff thought he was dealing with sources who could provide him with NAKED PICTURES OF PRESIDENT TRUMP. Democrats HATE President Trump because of all the good he has done for the working class and the poor.    Adam Schiff represents every reason so many of us are ashamed that we used to be Democrats.

Hillary screaming againHILLARY CLINTON’S ADVICE FOR MARRIED COUPLES

Hillary “Bugsy” Clinton, failed presidential candidate and career criminal, has a unique perspective on how to make a marriage last.

With Valentine’s Day coming up Hillary decided to discuss what makes her marriage work.

“As long as spouses cannot be forced to testify against each other, Bill and I will probably stay married forever!”  

Black Women 4 TrumpMARTIN LUTHER KING WOMEN OF COURAGE

More women of color who courageously reject Democrats who try to order them what to think and say:

Patricia Dickson – https://twitter.com/Patrici15767099       Continue reading →

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TOP FIVE FLASHMAN NOVELS: NUMBER FIVE

For Balladeer’s Blog’s Number One Harry Flashman Novel click HERE  . For background info on George MacDonald Fraser’s infamous anti-hero Harry Paget Flashman you can also click that link.

Flashman on the March5. FLASHMAN ON THE MARCH (2005)

Time Period: The 1867-1868 Abyssinian military campaign and rescue mission.

This volume of The Flashman Papers is set right after Harry’s unsuccessful attempt to spirit away Mexico’s overthrown Emperor Maximilian before he could be executed. (Well it wasn’t Flashman’s fault. As history tells us, Maximilian DID refuse to escape with the conspirators who busted in to save his sorry butt.)

Synopsis: After a passionate farewell kiss from (the real-life) Princess Agnes Salm-Salm, Harry Flashman further raises the ire of his Austrian escorts by seducing a young, blonde and buxom Hapsburg aristocrat on the trans-Atlantic voyage with Maximilian’s coffin.

In Trieste, with the Austrians planning to unleash their wrath on Flashman as soon as the ceremony for Maximilian is over, our main character bolts for the British consulate. HMG is happy to have Sir Harry on hand and entrusts him to escort the notorious 100,000 Maria Theresa Thalers being sent to finance General Robert Napier’s upcoming Abyssinian Expedition.   

Flashman on the March 2That expedition is being launched to free British captives being held and tortured by the (historically) unhinged Emperor Theodore II of Abyssinia (Called Ethiopia today). 

Before Colonel Flashman knows it he’s caught up in a clash with Muslim slavers on the Red Sea, then breezing right along to the Eritrean port of Zula, embarkation point for the British campaign into Abyssinia.  

The author George MacDonald Fraser’s descriptive talents were in top form in Flashman on the March. As fans well know, Fraser creates scenes in the reader’s mind that surpass the biggest-budgeted cinematic blockbusters.

This particular tale lets him fully unleash his genius for seeming to take his audience to faraway planets while never leaving the Earth. Abyssinia/ Ethiopia feels menacingly alien and its hostile terrain might as well be on an orbiting asteroid as we get dragged into deadly danger with the reluctant Flashman.   

Harry and his Royal Marine escorts eventually catch up with General Napier far inland, and even though our protagonist officially turns over the shipment of Thalers he is still at Napier’s mercy in terms of papers and transit orders home to England. 

With the British forces – complete with 44 war elephants from India – moving more slowly than anticipated, Napier decides to send Flashman on ahead of the main army.

Harry’s orders: a) to covertly keep tabs on the location of the hostages in case the Emperor decides to take them even further inland and b) to feel out Theodore’s many enemies in the war-torn country and try to recruit ad hoc allies to prevent the Emperor’s army from escaping.   

Kevin Kline good FlashmanFlashman’s guide, translator and fellow warrior will be the beautiful Ethiopian woman Uliba-Wark, half-sister to the country’s Queen. Uliba-Wark has a small domain of her own and is up to her neck in Abyssinia’s countless political and sexual intrigues & rivalries.

A running battle on horseback which leaves Harry and the warlike beauty as the sole survivors enroute to her castle is just a hint of the wild bed and battle action that lays ahead.   Continue reading →

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SAM PHILLIPS SINGING HER HIT “I NEED LOVE”

I don’t know why it took me so long to get around to this underrated song with terrific lyrics like “I need love, not some sentimental prison/ I need God, not the political church.” It’s Sam Phillips with I Need Love on this installment of Give Them A Shoutout Before They’re Dead.

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POLITICAL CARTOONS: A FEW OF THE LATEST

With daily revelations about the Uranium One Scandal and the way Obama used governmental agencies against political opponents here’s a few light-hearted political cartoons about the ongoing mess and the corporate media’s role in abetting the cover-ups.

see no evil ...

And here’s Obama as Nixon …

Richard Nixon

 

 

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DEMOCRAT ATROCITY ROUNDUP: FISA-GATE CONTINUES

Balladeer’s Blog presents another Democrat Atrocity Roundup.

democrat republican awakeDEMOCRATS SAY “OUR POLITICAL PARTY, RIGHT OR WRONG!” – Read any of the Watergate books that you choose and a very striking difference stands out: some Republican office-holders of the era openly expressed disgust over the Nixon scandals despite him being a member of their own political party. Not so the Democrats with the current flood of Hillary/ Obama scandals.

Democrats have driven away all of us with any sense of reason, leaving their party filled with political robots who are so lacking in individuality that none of their office-holders have enough integrity to express disgust over Hillary and Obama’s actions. Mindlessly and unquestioningly they parrot every ridiculous excuse that the Democratic (sic) National Committee orders them to believe.

You also have to wonder how many of the Democrat robots who are still in the Party ever bother to take in overseas news sources or other outlets. I’m guessing very few. The rest shut off their brains and stick to Huff-Po, the site for HUFFy, POST-menopausal white Democrats. 

Mascot with demo and repub headsDEAL WITH IT – Speaking of the Watergate and Vietnam War era, I will point out again that those times forced some of the political right in America to face up to  the flaws in their vision AND in their heroes.

The political left in America are perpetual children who STILL refuse to ever face up to the flaws in THEIR vision and THEIR heroes. The Left-Wing Archie Bunkers who have distorted our “educational system” (LMAO) are the main culprits. 

FBI cartoonF.B.I. = S.C.U.M. – More and more comes out on a daily basis regarding how the weak, inept and crooked little man named Barack Obama “fundamentally transformed” every arm of the government into a replica of the Chicago Political Sewer he slithered out of.

The FBI has been exposed as just a Democrat Campaign organization working on Hillary Clinton’s behalf.     Continue reading →

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10,000 MANIACS: LIKE THE WEATHER

“Give Them A Shoutout Before They’re Dead” strikes again! Balladeer’s Blog loves ANY group named in honor of H.G. Lewis’ original 2,000 Maniacs, so here’s Like The Weather.

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HILLARY READS ALOUD ABOUT BILL’S RAPES

Hillary reads

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