Monthly Archives: October 2017

WEREWOLVES OF LONDON

You knew it was coming at some point! It’s Warren Zevon with a very popular Halloween song.

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MONSTER RALLY: BEATRICE THE POISON WOMAN

FOR THE OTHER CREATURES IN THIS MONSTER RALLY CLICK HERE 

Rappaccini's Daughter 2BEATRICE RAPPACCINI

First Appearance: Rappaccini’s Daughter (1844)

Cryptid Category: Human-plant hybrid.

Lore: Beatrice Rappaccini, also called the Poison Woman, had been experimented on by her mad scientist father since infancy. Some dark rumors even held that the father – Doctor Giacomo Rappaccini – had spawned her from a seed-pod and that his tales of a wife were lies.

Beatrice was so toxic that she was the only one alive who could come into contact with the monstrous and deadly plants in her father’s courtyard garden. The Poison Woman’s beauty drove men wild, tempting many admirers to brave the dangers of her father’s mutated plant life.

The dark beauty’s flesh was a toxic poison and her breath could kill insects, snakes, rats and small children. Dead creatures made the ideal fertilizer for the creations of Beatrice’s father. It was hinted that Beatrice fed on the vermin killed by her breath, just like Venus Flytraps and other carnivorous plant-life. Continue reading

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THE TOP SEVEN NOVELS OF ROBERT LUDLUM: INDEX OF LINKS

Robert LudlumBalladeer’s Blog’s list of Robert Ludlum’s top seven novels was reasonably popular with readers. Here are links to each review of the set of seven:

NUMBER 7: THE GEMINI CONTENDERS (1976) – Click HERE 

NUMBER 6: THE ROAD TO GANDOLFO (1975) – Click HERE

NUMBER 5: THE SCARLATTI INHERITANCE (1971) – Click HERE

NUMBER 4: THE CHANCELLOR MANUSCRIPT (1977) – Click HERE

NUMBER 3: THE HOLCROFT COVENANT (1978) – Click HERE

NUMBER 2: THE BOURNE IDENTITY (1980) – Click HERE

NUMBER 1: THE MATARESE CIRCLE (1979) – Click HERE

 

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CEMETERY MAN (1994)

FOR REVIEWS OF SIMILAR HALLOWEEN MOVIES CLICK HERE

Cemetery Man

Cemetery Man

CEMETERY MAN (DELLAMORTE DELLAMORE) (1994) – This film is based on stories by Tiziano Sclavi, the man at the center of “Sclavian philosophy” from Italy. Michele Soavi directed and Rupert Everett starred as the hero, Francesco Dellamorte. Dellamorte is the gravedigger and custodian of Buffalora Cemetery, Buffalora being a fictional town supposedly in the north of Italy.

If you ever wondered what the Patrick McGoohan series The Prisoner would have been like if it had been done as a horror story rather than sci-fi then Cemetery Man is the movie for you! The film employs the same Kafkaesque themes that The Prisoner did with heavy overtones of Sartre’s work The Myth of Sisyphus.

The dead buried in Buffalora Cemetery tend to come back to life as killer zombies after seven days. Dellamorte, with minimal help from his rotund and simple-minded assistant Gnaghi (Francois Hadji-Lazaro), destroys the undead monsters. Our hero gets no thanks from the living citizens of Buffalora, however, who treat him like a Village Idiot and spread rumors that he is either impotent or a eunuch. Mysterious benefactors pay Dellamorte well for his thankless job via envelopes of cash that they mail to him. Continue reading

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STRANGE BREW: HALLOWEEN SONG

Halloween Month is slipping away! Think of this song as being about witch’s brew or the strange brew made by the Gnomes of the Catskills during their one week here on Earth each October.

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DEMOCRAT ATROCITY ROUNDUP: RED CROSS CALLS THE U.S. – MEXICO BORDER A WAR ZONE

Balladeer’s Blog despises both the Democrats and the Republicans but since too many people overseas still mistakenly think the Democrats are not yet as bad as Republican trash like Paul Ryan here’s another look at Democrat atrocities.

International red crossRED CROSS COMPARES THE U.S. – MEXICO BORDER TO A WAR ZONE – Apparently the white collar criminals of the Washington D.C. Swamp are going to wait until Mexican Drug Cartel gunmen are trading shots inside the Alamo itself before they deign to acknowledge the druglord no-man’s land in the American Southwest.

Our STILL unsecured southern border remains a sieve for all illegal comers, even diseased and criminal ones. The Democrats do not care about our friends and loved ones who have been killed, wounded or forced to move as the Cartels slither over from the Narco-State of Mexico.

Victims of Illegal ImmigrantsNor do they care about all the additional crimes committed by repeat deportees who simply re-cross the border. Democrats consider all illegal immigrants to be voters for their political party, either with or without amnesty. AND the party’s big money donors want the flood of illegals to continue so that wages fall, padding their own financial bottom lines. 

Two of the biggest lies Democrats tell about illegal immigration: a) “Illegal immigrants do the jobs Americans won’t do.” No, they do the jobs that pompous snobs and one percenters won’t do. Americans would be quite willing to do those jobs.

And b) Back in the 1990s Democrats claimed NAFTA and similar deals that shaft American workers will provide so many jobs in Mexico that the flood of illegals will stop because those people will find work in Mexico instead of slipping across the border. And needless to say, Democrats said it in their usual condescending, clueless jackass manner. Just like they do EVERY TIME THEY’RE WRONG. Continue reading

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FRANKENSTEIN’S ARMY (2013)

Frankenestein's ArmyFRANKENSTEIN’S ARMY (2013) – Halloween Month continues here at Balladeer’s Blog with this odd mish-mash of a film. Frankenstein’s Army is one of those horror movies which is presented as Found Footage for no reason and even though it’s set during World War 2 it’s being filmed in color for no reason at all and it’s being filmed by a Russian film crew for ABSOLUTELY no reason at all.

Okay, to be serious I will admit that having the story told from the perspective of a Russian army unit is a nice novelty. I think most viewers are pleased that they don’t have to endure yet another group of armed American stereotypes fighting a war while bantering with each other.

It’s the closing weeks of the war in the European Theater of Combat and our Soviet soldiers are on a secret mission to extract Dr Victor Frankenstein, the latest mad scientist descendant of that infamous family. Little do they know they’re in for a nightmarish battle against re-animated, refitted and mechanized corpses even stranger than Herbert West’s creations.  

Frankenstein's Army 2Dr Frankenstein has been doing experiments for the Germans, working on those Top Secret “wonder weapons” that Hitler and his propagandists kept reassuring the suffering German civilians about. Stalin wants our heroes to determine the nature of Frankenstein’s creations and take him into custody to continue his work for the blood-soaked Soviet dictator.

You’d think the camera crew would be along to film ONLY Frankenstein’s work but no, they film EVERYTHING, making this yet another Found Footage flick to piss away its pacing with interludes that are as dull as real life. There are some decent renderings of the nearly post-apocalyptic German countryside but the color footage reveals how inauthentic the movie’s Russian and German uniforms are.     Continue reading

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PAGLIA, SOMMERS AND SOME MORE TIRADES FROM FACULTY LOUNGE FASCISTS

Education or indoctrination gifHere’s another look at Left-Wing Archie Bunkers, or Faculty Lounge Fascists or whatever term you like for the make-believe “teachers” (LMAO) who have ruined the educational system. 

FIRST – A video featuring THE Camille Paglia and THE Christina Hoff Sommers reiterating how much damage has been done by the way the educational field was taken over by petty, close-minded political zealots.

SECOND – A USC Democrat “educator” who publicly discusses his belief that it is racist oppression to punish Democrats for acts of violence against people with whom they disagree. – (Video at the article) – HERE 

THIRD – The Washington Post has this story about ANOTHER series of alleged “racist” graffiti incidents that TURNED OUT TO BE COMMITTED BY A DEMOCRAT OF COLOR – Click HERE

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TOP SEVEN ROBERT LUDLUM NOVELS: NUMBER ONE

FOR BALLADEER’S BLOG’S SEVENTH PLACE LUDLUM NOVEL CLICK HERE 

Matarese CircleNUMBER ONE: THE MATARESE CIRCLE (1979) 

TIME PERIOD: Late 1970s with investigations into events from before World War One and later.

To me this lengthy, epic espionage novel from Robert Ludlum was his finest work, partly because it nicely encapsulated how – over the course of the 20th Century – the world gradually found itself at the mercy of elaborate “intelligence communities”  (LMAO) working in conjunction with international corporate fascists.  

There’s something almost poetic about the way that – with the hindsight we have here in 2017 – the bitter enmity between the novel’s central characters (one a U.S. agent and the other a Soviet agent) is washed away a mere decade before the real-world collapse of the Cold War paradigm.

And with that same hindsight it’s almost eerie how those two rivals come to realize that the real seeds of future totalitarianism lie in the New Feudalism’s ugly motto: Nations are obsolete, so wealth wedded to unchecked political power is the coming thing. Ludlum’s arch-villain Guillaume de Matarese was positively prescient.

LEAD HERO: Brandon Alan Scofield – Codename: Beowulf Agate. Forty-six year old veteran of Consular Operations, Ludlum’s fictional Intelligence Organization specializing in defections from hostile nations – mostly Communist – to the United States.

Matarese Circle 2As The Matarese Circle opens in 1979, Scofield has been with Consular Operations  for 22 years, almost since its founding. A Harvard grad fluent in multiple languages, Brandon joined the U.S. State Department right out of college. After a couple years in the “real” State Department he gravitated to State’s covert section Consular Operations (or Cons Op for short). 

In those early years Cons Op’s activities were not yet totally Top Secret. They were virtually a humanitarian organization which tried to accommodate as many people fleeing the Iron Curtain nations as possible. So many Eastern Europeans began seeking asylum in the Western World that the Soviets realized they had to take steps to cut off the flow of escapees.

Similar to the way they would later construct the Berlin Wall to prevent flight from East Berlin in particular, the Soviets clamped down on potential defections throughout Europe and elsewhere. Soviet intelligence agents – among them Vasili Taleniekov – began shutting down the almost openly- operating Cons Op defection network.

Violence escalated on both sides and eventually Consular Operations was forced to act more and more covertly. The organization was no longer able to accommodate asylum requests from the scores of people who appealed to them daily, hoping to escape to the U.S.

Now Cons Op had to narrow their scope exclusively to high-level defectors who were deemed sufficiently “valuable” to U.S. Intelligence, Military, Political and Scientific pursuits. Brandon Scofield proved proficient at the covert skills and the violence necessary to carry out Cons Op’s narrowed mission but was disillusioned by the changes.

Scofield was set to transfer to a different section of the State Department, intent on pursuing a career as a Diplomat. Unfortunately, shortly before that transfer could be finalized, KGB Agent Vasili Taleniekov (who knew nothing of the planned transfer) engineered the hit and run death of Scofield’s wife Karine, as a message to Beowulf Agate and his colleagues in Consular Operations.

Brandon Scofield’s fury over his wife’s fate steeled his resolve rather than intimidating him or making him careless. He canceled the transfer request and went on to be Cons Ops’ most effective field agent in Europe and the U.S.S.R.

Not only did Beowulf Agate thrive on stinging the Soviets by pulling off the most high-level defections he could, but he also took a more personal revenge by killing the brother of Vasili Taleniekov, the KGB man behind his wife’s murder.

From then on the professional and personal enmity between Scofield/ Beowulf Agate and Taleniekov/ The Serpent helped write the history of both their organizations. The two men clashed all over the map, with Scofield and his fellow Cold War versions of the Scarlet Pimpernel helping as many defectors as possible while Taleniekov and his KGB colleagues thwarted them whenever they could.

SECONDARY HERO: Vasili Vasilovich Taleniekov – Codename: The Serpent. (I’ve always felt the Viper would have made a better codename since it would reflect the “V” for Vasili just like Beowulf Agate’s codename matched the B.A. for Brandon Alan in Scofield’s name.)

As this novel opens Taleniekov has been with the KGB for 25 years. Like Scofield he was a brilliant student but the Soviet government decreed that with his aptitudes he would serve the State better as an intelligence agent rather than as an historian like he wanted. Continue reading

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LAYLA: ADD AN H AND MAKE IT A HALLOWEEN SONG

Leila WaddellLet’s cheat a little. Take the title of the song Layla, then add an “H” in honor of Halloween to make it LAYLAH as in Aleister Crowley’s work The Book of Lies.

And voila! We can pretend it’s a song dedicated to Leila Waddell (photo at left), the woman who modeled as LAYLAH in The Book of Lies. Halloween Month continues with this VERY contrived musical shoutout. Because let’s face it: Crowley and contrived just GO together.

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