IDAHO TRANSFER (1973): MOVIE REVIEW

IDAHO TRANSFER (1973) – This film, directed by Peter Fonda and starring mostly unknowns, deals with time travel and post-apocalypse themes. It was retitled Deranged for its DVD release. I have no idea why.

Not so long ago Idaho Transfer was regarded among us fans of bad movies as a So-Bad-It’s Good example of the way so many 1970s sci-fi films were presented as if they were being deep and innovative when in truth they were just reworking ideas from old Twilight Zone and Outer Limits episodes but dragging them out to unbearable length.

Here in 2021 Idaho Transfer has fallen so far off the schlock charts that it’s unknown to many viewers. However, it is STILL one of the best So-Bad-It’s-Good examples of pretentious yet shallow 1970s sci-fi films. While this story might have made a decent episode of a half-hour anthology series it is excruciatingly stretched out to 86 minutes.

THE PREMISE: In the movie’s present-day (1973) a group of scientists in Idaho have been using their federal grant money to try developing a teleportation/ matter transfer device for the government. Along the way, however, they realized that they had accidentally invented a machine that transports people and objects through time instead of space.  Continue reading

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GODS AND GODDESSES OF FIJI

Fiji IslandsIn the past Balladeer’s Blog has examined the gods and myths of Polynesian people in Hawaii, Samoa, Bellona and Rennell. This time around I’m taking a look at the neglected gods of the Melanesian people of Fiji.

NOTE: I am spelling the names of the deities phonetically to make it easier for readers to know how to pronounce them. I’m doing this to avoid the awkwardness of having to remember the odd rules regarding how to pronounce certain consonants.

For instance “Q” is pronounced “ng-g” so with the name of the shark god, spelled Dakuwanqa in that system, I will spell it Ndakuwang-ga so readers don’t have to remember how Q is supposed to be pronounced or that “D” is pronounced “nd”. After all, the Fijians certainly were not using our alphabet prior to contact with Europeans, so I think it’s inefficient to expect readers to remember odd pronunciation rules for letters that the Fijians never used to begin with.

KONOSAU – The god of stillborn infants. Originally born dead to the first Bau woman taken to Rewa, this entity became the patron deity of such offspring. His main temple is called Nai Bili. 

NAITONU – The god of nudity. I’m not joking. Naitonu hates the custom of wearing clothing and not only is he constantly naked but he expects nudity from everyone entering his territory – even if they are just passing through. Failure to comply will result in the offender being struck with leprosy. 

Fiji 2ALEWANISOSO – The patron goddess of travelers and hospitality. Regardless of their tribe, fellow Fijians who reach one of Alewanisoso’s temples can be assured of not being harmed during their stay – usually an overnight one. 

Hostility or rudeness of any kind is taboo in her temples and everyone entering is expected to conduct themselves as gently and courteously as they would when wooing a mate.

masc graveyard smallerROKOMAUTU – A son of the supreme deity Ndengei by his sister. This deity was born from his mother’s elbow as another example of birthing oddities in world mythology. Rokomautu was so headstrong he tried to force even his own parents to worship him. 

Rokomautu falls into the mythological category that Balladeer’s Blog’s readers will remember as a Divine Geographer. When Ndengei first created the world the land was featureless, so he sent his son Rokomautu to provide character. The god sculpted the Earth’s various geographic features.

The sandy beaches of Fiji were created by Rokomautu dragging his flowing robe over the terrain. When the god pulled up his robe while walking the land became rocky or filled with mangrove bushes. By some accounts anywhere that he spat a lake or river would form.  Continue reading

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BIDEN LIES, SCANDALS AND FAILURES CONTINUE TO PILE UP

biden trying to distract from Afghan debacleIt’s been multiple catastrophes per day with Joe Biden in the White House. And Biden’s regime is still squirming over questions regarding why it drone-killed innocent people while thinking it was killing terrorists. PLUS Biden’s Afghanistan Hostage Crisis continues.

*** BREAKING: BIDEN REGIME IS CUTTING OUR ALLIES INDIA AND JAPAN OUT OF THE INTERNATIONAL AGREEMENT ON SHARING INTELLIGENCE ON CHINA. Once again we see that China more than gets its money’s worth out of the bought and paid for Joe Biden.

*** BREAKING: BIDEN REGIME FORCING DETAINEES TO LIVE UNDER A BRIDGE AMID THEIR OWN WASTE MATTER. How callous and uncaring is Joe Biden? 

BIDEN REGIME FORCED TO ADMIT THAT “SEVERAL THOUSAND” ARE TRAPPED IN AFGHANISTAN, NOT THE HUNDRED THAT SENILE JOE BIDEN CLAIMED.

biden blood on handsBIDEN FAMILY CORRUPTION REPORTS IN NEW BOOK “THE BIDENS” CENTER AROUND OPENNESS TO BRIBES AND MORE. Is this why the term “Biden Crime Family” has become a thing? Joe’s family sits in comfort while the poor suffer under his reign. 

“THE MADNESS OF DEMENTED JOE BIDEN” CONTINUES AS HIS REGIME MEMBERS CUT HIS MICROPHONE YET AGAIN TO PREVENT HIM FROM GOING OFF-SCRIPT. Biden shows how mentally unfit he is with every off-the-cuff statement now, hence the need to silence him.

BIDEN INFLATION CONTINUES TO WIPE OUT WORKING CLASS TAKE-HOME PAY. Plus HERE.

AUSTRALIAN JOURNALIST OFFERS TO “WRITE A CHEQUE” TO ANYONE WHO CAN DECIPHER JOE BIDEN’S BLITHERING NONSENSE.

MORE PROTESTORS GREET THE BUMBLING AND CORRUPT BIDEN IN HIS TRAVELS. Some signs add to the “F*ck Biden” hashtag while others mock his creepy hair-smelling fetish.

ANTI-BIDEN PROTESTS SPREAD THROUGH NEW YORK CITY. More HERE. Continue reading

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AN AZTEC MUMMY IN CALIFORNIA: THE SQUAW HOLLOW SENSATION (1879)

With Squaw Valley becoming Palisades Tahoe now I figured what better time to revisit this neglected 1879 horror story which deserves to be as remembered as Sleepy Hollow, House of the Seven Gables and others. 

Aztec Mummy

THE SQUAW HOLLOW SENSATION (1879) – The Squaw Hollow Sensation was originally published in serialized form in the California newspaper The Mountain Democrat from May 31st to July 26th, 1879. The story was set in Squaw Hollow, California, near Placerville in present-day El Dorado County. In fact the El Dorado County Historical Museum was where I obtained my copy of the story for this review.

Our main character is Berlin’s Doctor Loerder Von Herbst, a man trying to prove that ancient Egyptians migrated across the Atlantic Ocean and that the Aztecs were really a colony of Egypt. His studies have led him throughout the American West, northern Mexico and part of California, wherever he believes the legendary region of ancient Aztlan to have been. Von Herbst theorizes  that the preserved figures called Aztec Mummies are not corpses but rather living beings who were put into a centuries-long sleep and can be revived.

Squaw Hollow SensationThe good doctor has created a special chemical solution that in experiments has restored body parts from dissected corpses to a condition resembling living tissue. He believes he can use this chemical solution as part of a procedure to bring an Aztec Mummy back to life. Ancient papyri refer to “Heaven’s fire” and Dr Von Herbst is convinced that means lightning and so he plans to use electricity generated from a Daniell’s Battery to aid in the resuscitation process.

With the aid of various assistants the doctor investigates an Aztec tomb uncovered by mining operations. Inside that subterranean tomb are 50 mummified Aztec bodies that are over a thousand years old. With this bonanza on his hands Doctor Von Herbst sets up a laboratory in the massive burial structure and sets to work, carefully keeping a secret of the bodies he and his assistants have discovered. He begins by soaking the mummies in large vats full of his restorative chemical solution which replenishes the bodily fluids of the dehydrated bodies. Continue reading

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DOCTOR HACKENSAW’S SECRETS (1921-1925): ANCIENT SCIENCE FICTION

doctor hackensawDOCTOR HACKENSAW’S SECRETS – Written by Clement Fezandie. Doctor Hackensaw and his adventures were similar to Paul B’Old’s short stories about Professor Jerome Mudgewood, but with less emphasis on humor. Both figures dealt with the often destructive consequences of their own inventions or discoveries. Ferzandie’s Hackensaw tales were published in the magazine Science and Invention.

Dr Hackensaw’s supporting cast included reporter and ladies’ man Silas Rockett, enthusiastic and perky teen girl Pep Perkins and precocious boy Tintangeles Smith.

THE SECRET OF ARTIFICIAL REPRODUCTION (May 1921) – The first Dr Hackensaw story. Mostly speculative as the good doctor puts forth plans for what we would today call genetic engineering and cloning. Hackensaw depicts mass-produced soldiers of incredible physical prowess and mass-produced livestock to end world hunger. He pushes the envelope with a cat-dog hybrid animal and with human fetuses being grown in the uteruses of cows.

THE SECRET OF THE ATOM (July 1921) – Hackensaw experiments with the study of subatomic particles and with what we today call particle physics. A fairly dull effort compared to the other Dr H tales.

THE SECRET OF SUSPENDED ANIMATION (October 1921) – Dr Hackensaw pioneers chryosleep concepts by using carbon dioxide-heavy treatments. Not only can he preserve living things but he tries to do the reverse by reviving a pterodactyl frozen for millions of years. The pterodactyl eventually escapes and goes on a rampage. Continue reading

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MONDAY MUSINGS

biden afghanistan cartoonIndependent Voter site Balladeer’s Blog’s musings on this Monday. Joe Biden still has hostages in Afghanistan. 

Andrew YangANDREW YANG LEAVES THE DEMOCRAT PARTY TO FORM A THIRD PARTY. Yang is the latest of us former Democrats to #WALKAWAY from that increasingly intolerant and fascistic political party. Alternatives to America’s rival gangs of white-collar criminals called the Democrat and Republican Parties are desperately needed.

PRIVILEGED WHITE ONE PERCENTER JOE BIDEN IS A WAR CRIMINAL NOW. And that’s on top of being a career white-collar criminal, the product of a slave-owning family, the most crooked figurehead this side of Warren G Harding and an accused rapist. Hey, Joe, how did you get to be worth about 150 million dollars on a Senator’s pay for all those years? Certainly by no honest means.

CROWDS AT SPORTING EVENTS AND AT SPORTSBARS CONTINUE CHANTING ANTI-BIDEN SLOGANS FOR YET ANOTHER WEEK IN A ROW. More HERE. Joe Biden, like George W Bush, is utter filth. And Biden keeps getting hit with insults from crowds wherever he goes, deservedly so.

BY THE WAY, BIDEN STILL HAS MORE KIDS IN CAGES THAN EITHER OBAMA OR TRUMP EVER DID. But as we all know, Democrats never cared about those kids. They just used them as a political stick. Continue reading

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COLLEGE FOOTBALL RESULTS FROM SEPTEMBER 11th

HEADLINES

Bluefield_WVBLUEFIELD CONQUERS DIVISION TWO – The NAIA’s BLUEFIELD COLLEGE RAMBLING RAMS took it on the road against the NCAA Division Two team the EMORY & HENRY COLLEGE WASPS. For newbies this is like when 1AA teams take on 1A teams. Trailing 38-17 in the 4th Quarter the Rambling Rams came back to win 46-45!

Oshkosh TitansGIANT-KILLERS – This week 3 NCAA Division 3 teams imitated the NAIA’s usual schtick of defeating teams from higher divisions. The UW-OSHKOSH TITANS won 28-10 at D2’s NORTHERN MICHIGAN WILDCATS   ###   Meanwhile the LINFIELD COLLEGE WILDCATS hammered D2’s SIMON FRASER UNIVERSITY CLAN 56-20   ###   And the WHITWORTH UNIVERSITY PIRATES edged D2’s LINCOLN (CA) UNIVERSITY OAKLANDERS 31-29.

bluefield state football helmetHISTORY WAS MADE – The BLUEFIELD STATE BIG BLUE managed the FIRST victory for their revived intercollegiate football program! After losing last week the Big Blue visited the ELIZABETH CITY STATE VIKINGS. Bluefield State trailed 21-0 in the 1st Quarter but tied things up 21-21 by Halftime. The Vikings went up 27-21 in the 3rd but the Big Blue came back to win it 35-27. 

Susquehanna University River Hawks helmetMARATHON GAME OF THE WEEK – This particular designation goes to the clash between the SUSQUEHANNA UNIVERSITY RIVER HAWKS and their hosts the FRANKLIN & MARSHALL COLLEGE DIPLOMATS. It took FIVE OVERTIMES before the River Hawks emerged with a 30-28 victory. Continue reading

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SPIDER-MAN: 1970s CLASSICS PART THREE

Here’s Part Three of Spider-Man 1970s Classics. For Part One click HERE.

spidey 123SPIDER-MAN Vol 1 #123 (August 1973)

Title: Just A Man Called Cage

Villain: Luke Cage, Hero for Hire

NOTE: Luke Cage was still going by Hero for Hire at this time, not Power Man.

Synopsis: This issue opens up with the police plus J Jonah Jameson and his City Editor Joseph “Robbie” Robertson at the crime scene where Norman Osborn has been found murdered. Jameson is, of course, insisting that Osborn, an old friend and major advertiser at the Daily Bugle, must have been killed by Spider-Man. The webslinger had been searching for Osborn through Robertson’s contacts at the Bugle earlier in the evening.

spider man 123 splash pageRobbie and the police at the scene tell Jameson they aren’t so sure Spider-Man was the killer. There are fragments of the Green Goblin’s exploding pumpkin-bombs in the battle scarred area there on the New York City streets. PLUS, someone obviously moved Osborn’s body a bit before the cops arrived on the scene. At length Jonah refuses to listen any further and rides off angrily in his limo. 

From a nearby rooftop the mysterious man in the shadows from the end of last issue reflects that HE is the one who moved Osborn’s dead body when he was removing his Green Goblin costume and bat-shaped flier. He knew that if the world learned that Norman Osborn was really the supervillain the Green Goblin they wouldn’t care about his death.

The mystery man further reflects that millionaire industrialist Norman Osborn, with his secret identity preserved, is still looked on as a pillar of the community and therefore he will be widely mourned and the police will be pressured to bring in Spider-Man for questioning.

NOTE: It’s no spoiler this many decades later to mention that this shadowy figure turns out to be Harry Osborn, Norman’s son, who witnessed the final battle between Spider-Man and the Green Goblin and will become the new Goblin months down the road. 

Meanwhile J Jonah Jameson decides to hire the new superhero Luke Cage to do what the police can’t do and capture or kill Spider-Man.    Continue reading

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JOE BIDEN, IMPOTENT ON THE GLOBAL STAGE, THREATENS AND HARASSES AMERICAN CITIZENS

biden blustering like a fool

Blustering demagogue

BREAKING: Andrew Yang has left the Democrats and announced he plans to start a Third Party.

Joe Biden, down to 39% and lower in approval rating, is living up to the old stereotype of a man who is a failure out in the real world but who compensates for that by beating their wife and children. Humiliated at every turn globally and with his ATF nominee failing, the corrupt yet senile Biden has taken to using language about how he is “losing patience” with people in the U.S. and threatening to use his “powers as president to get them out of the way” if they continue to defy him. Given Biden’s handling of Afghanistan, I guess that means he’ll be surrendering to all of us and giving us nearly 90 billion dollars worth of military equipment. 

Just kidding! The detestable toad Biden and his political generals like Mark “Thoroughly Modern” Milley would likely show no restraint against their own country’s citizens, just like all the other totalitarian regimes in history. The pattern is often the same – failures overseas but iron-fisted authoritarians at home.

Note the Biden regime’s recent description of the Taliban as “professional and businesslike” and compare that to Biden’s insulting language when addressing people of the U.S. (And Joe still hasn’t gotten the hostages out of Afghanistan.)    

biden blood on handsAt any rate, those oh-so-tough remarks from accused rapist Joe Biden are up there with the impotent demagogue’s reminder to us months ago that he can use nukes and fighter jets against the American populace if we don’t learn our place. (This guy is nuts.) Well, Biden DID use a drone to kill an innocent Afghan family who had papers to travel to the U.S. a few weeks back in his idiotic attempt at a “reprisal strike” after the Kabul airport attack, so it’s hard to put anything past this crooked, bought and paid for whore.

For decades, Joe Biden has been thoroughly despised outside of the white collar criminals who hold office in the notoriously corrupt American government and the rest of the world has gotten a chance to see why. The nonstop verbal abuse Biden was subjected to during his tour of New Jersey storm damage recently seems to have really rattled the inept, senile fool, thus prompting his insecure flexing of authoritarian “macho” by way of threatening language. Continue reading

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RIKI-OH: THE STORY OF RICKY (1991): CULT MOVIE CLASSIC

riki-ohRIKI-OH: THE STORY OF RICKY (1991) – Back when I started Balladeer’s Blog in 2010 this Hong Kong martial arts/ splatter film was among the first movies I planned to review. Feeling intimidated by the need to describe the sheer scale of the joyously tasteless violence in this movie I kept postponing it. Eventually, it seemed so notorious that I figured too many people knew about it for me to bother.

This week I was floored to meet a fellow fan of bad movies and learn that they had never even heard of Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky. That galvanized me to finally post a review of the movie.

WARNING: For people who shy away from ultra-violence and the like, I will point out that this film usually grosses out and disgusts viewers just as much as some other flicks I’ve reviewed, like Father’s Day, Mandy, Lewd Lizard, Headless, etc. If you hated those reviews, you’ll likely hate this one, too.

riki oh in prison yardRiki-Oh (pronounced Ricky-HO) is also known as Violence King and with good reason. This Category 3 Hong Kong movie does the seemingly impossible – it more than lives up to the Japanese Manga it was based on. Siu-Wong Fan stars as the title character. Ngai Choi Lam directed and wrote the screenplay adaptation.

Get ready for a kung fu film which combines the violent sensibilities of the Three Stooges crossed with the gore of Psycho Gothic Lolita, Dead Alive plus the aforementioned Mandy and Father’s Day.  Not to mention more shots of men standing at urinals than you’d see at a major league ball park.  Continue reading

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