Category Archives: humor

SUPERCUT OF NEW DEMOCRAT SLOGANS

Mascot with demo and repub headsBalladeer’s Blog’s readers have spoken! You’ve asked for a long, “super-cut” collection of all my New Democrat Slogans blog posts in one entry. We’ll start out with a few brand-new ones followed by all the previous mock slogans.

Anyway, Democrats have become such repulsive people that I like to “raise awareness” with them regarding the fact that their pompous snobbery is itself the type of bigotry they pretend to oppose.

DEMOCRATS: ALL OF OUR OPINIONS SHOULD CARRY THE FORCE OF LAW!

DEMOCRATS: THE CAMPAIGN NEVER ENDS … AND NEITHER WILL OUR DISCOVERY OF BOXES FULL OF “UNCOUNTED” VOTES!

DEMOCRATS: WE OVERUSED THE WORD “RACIST” TO THE POINT OF MEANINGLESSNESS. NOW WE’RE DOING THE SAME WITH “WHITE SUPREMACIST.”

DEMOCRATS: ANY SYSTEM IN WHICH ANY OF OUR CANDIDATES CAN LOSE IS AN UNFAIR SYSTEM THAT NEEDS CHANGED, DAMMIT!

DEMOCRATS: WE WARNED YOU THAT IF ANY MORE ELECTIONS DID NOT GO THE WAY WE WANTED THEN WE WOULD IMPOSE VIOLENT FASCISM AND NOW WE’RE KEEPING THAT PROMISE! Continue reading

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Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, Neglected History, opinion

NEW DEMOCRAT SLOGANS

Democrats are hateIt’s been awhile but here are some new suggested slogans for the totalitarian psychopaths who still call themselves Democrats. FOR ONE OF THE MANY RUNNING TALLIES ON POLITICAL VIOLENCE RECENTLY COMMITTED BY DEMOCRATS CLICK HERE

*** DEMOCRATS: WE MAKE PURITANS OF THE 1600s LOOK TOLERANT OF DISSENTING OPINIONS! TO THEM DISSENT WAS A “SIN” – TO US IT’S “HATE!”

*** MAKE SURE THAT ANY HALLOWEEN COSTUMES WORN BY YOU AND/OR YOUR CHILDREN ARE APPROVED BY US DEMOCRATS … OTHERWISE WE WILL FILE A COMPLAINT ABOUT YOU!

*** DID YOU KNOW WE DEMOCRATS HAVE A WONDERFUL PLAN FOR YOUR LIFE?

*** DEMOCRATS: WE’LL JUST KEEP FILING COMPLAINTS ABOUT PEOPLE UNTIL THERE’S NOTHING BUT US DEMOCRATS LEFT WORKING HERE! (See colleges and universities, news outlets, NPR, PBS and many others!)

*** HOW DO WE KNOW? PRIVILEGED WHITE DEMOCRATS TELL US SOOO! (A reference to the old religious zealot song “How do I know? The Bible Tells Me So“)

*** DEMOCRATS: SIMPLE-MINDED ADOLESCENT OUTRAGE IS A WAY OF LIFE. EVEN INTO OUR SEVENTIES! 

Democrats mike myers*** YOU PEASANTS ARE ALLOWED TO SAY, DO, WRITE OR POST ON THE INTERNET ONLY THOSE THINGS WHICH DON’T UPSET US DEMOCRATS.

*** ONLY THOSE PEOPLE OF COLOR WHO AGREE WITH US WHITE DEMOCRATS ARE AUTHENTIC. THE REST MUST BE HOUNDED FROM PUBLIC LIFE OR RECANT.

*** IT’S A FREE COUNTRY … AS LONG AS WE DEMOCRATS APPROVE.

*** THE ONLY THINGS THAT ARE NOT HATEFUL ARE THE THINGS WE DEMOCRATS OKAY.

*** DEMOCRATS: YOUR CHILDREN’S TEACHERS ARE OUR CLERGY!

*** WE DEMOCRATS AND WE ALONE DICTATE WHAT IS ACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOR BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN!

*** DEMOCRATS: WE CIRCUMVENT DEMOCRACY THROUGH CORPORATE FASCISM AND MASS MEDIA HARRASSMENT! Continue reading

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Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, Neglected History, opinion

THE DEMOCRATS’ PLATFORM

#walkaway march on washingtonI’ll start with a reminder that it’s just one week til the start of the #WALKAWAY MARCH ON WASHINGTON.  Many people from among the millions of former Democrats driven away by the Party’s fascism and intolerance will be there.

Democrat PlatformWith Antifa (really KLAN-tifa) blocking traffic and beating up the elderly in Portland while the Democrat Mayor orders the police to stand down and with Democrats like Nancy Pelosi STILL refusing to denounce the violence (this week she actually referred to the victims of Democrat violence as “collateral damage”) here’s a look at the apparent 2018 Democrat Platform.

*** REMEMBER “WHAT’S GOOD FOR GENERAL MOTORS IS GOOD FOR THE USA? WELL, WE’VE CHANGED THAT TO “WHAT’S GOOD FOR US DEMOCRATS – AND ONLY WHAT’S GOOD FOR US DEMOCRATS – IS GOOD FOR THE USA!”

*** WE DIDN’T GET INTO POLITICS TO LISTEN TO YOU VOTERS, WE DID IT TO GET GRAFT AND BRIBE MONEY. 

*** WE DEMOCRATS WOULD RATHER SEE THOUSANDS OF YOU PEASANTS RAPED AND KILLED THAN INCONVENIENCE ONE SINGLE ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT!

*** YOUR FRIENDS AND LOVED ONES IN THE ARMED FORCES ARE IMPERIALIST SCUM, BUT MURDEROUS HOMOPHOBE CHE GUEVARA WAS A REVOLUTIONARY! 

*** IF YOU’RE NOT WITH US, YOU’RE AGAINST US!

*** WE DEMOCRATS STILL OPPOSE VOTER I.D. BECAUSE IT HINDERS OUR PERENNIAL VOTER FRAUD!

*** WE REFUSE TO DENOUNCE OLE MISS PROFESSOR JAMES THOMAS’ SUGGESTION THAT SERVICE PERSONNEL CONTAMINATE THE FOOD OF REPUBLICANS … AND REMEMBER, IF YOUR CHILDREN COMPLAIN HE CAN GIVE THEM BAD GRADES!

Hillary change the rules*** THE POLICE ARE THE REAL CRIMINALS AND MUST BE HAMSTRUNG AT EVERY TURN! 

*** THIS DREADFUL DONALD TRUMP PERSON HAS FILLED THE WORKING CLASS RABBLE WITH THOUGHTS ABOVE THEIR STATION IN LIFE!

*** VOTE FOR US DEMOCRATS OR WE WILL TOTALLY FILE A COMPLAINT ABOUT YOU!

*** WITH THE TECHNOFASCISTS AT GOOGLE, FACEBOOK AND TWITTER ON OUR SIDE WE WILL SILENCE ALL DISSENT!

*** WE DEMOCRATS PLEDGE TO PHYSICALLY ASSAULT ALL OPPOSITION CANDIDATES LIKE WE DID IN MINNESOTA THIS WEEK

*** AFRICAN-AMERICANS NEED REMINDED THAT WE DEMOCRATS OWN THEM JUST LIKE WE DID ON OUR PLANTATIONS! Continue reading

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Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, Neglected History, opinion

RANDOM FRIDAY WEIRDNESS IV

Democrat Keith Ellison IS Superman!  Continue reading

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RANDOM FRIDAY WEIRDNESS III

THE ULTIMATE BAT-FLECK MOMENT Continue reading

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RANDOM FRIDAY WEIRDNESS II

I WANT TO SEE THIS ON THE BIG SCREEN! Continue reading

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SOME RANDOM FRIDAY WEIRDNESS

You can insert your own Phantasm joke here.Superman GraveIF YOU’RE WONDERING HOW LOIS DIED … Continue reading

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FAQ’s ON ISLAM’S HOMOPHOBIA AND MISOGYNY

Islamophobia posterMuslim Violence Awareness Year continues. Regular readers of Balladeer’s Blog know I’m a non-believer in all of the world’s religions. Most religious practitioners are able to deal with that though some show varying degrees of anger. There is only ONE religion here in the 21st Century that retains the large-scale superstitious savagery of centuries past and that is Islam. I could literally fill this blog every single day with nothing but article after article about Muslim atrocities but the horror of it all would be overwhelming.

At any rate this is the time of year to focus on the fact that there is no god named Allah and Muhammad was a false prophet. It’s also a good time of year to focus on FAQ’s about the most homophobic and misogynistic religion in the world at this particular point in history.

Q: Are you one of those cowardly non-believers who will only criticize Christianity while giving Islam a free pass?

A: No, I criticize all religions and regard them all as fascinating mythology that should never be taken literally. Muslims are the only ones who violently insist their religion should be above that sort of criticism.

Islam is slavery

THIS HAUNTING IMAGE STRIKES RIGHT TO THE CORE OF THE HATRED THAT IS ISLAM.

Q: Isn’t it, like, mean ‘n’ stuff to criticize somebody’s religion?

A: No, it’s only rational to subject all of the world’s religions to criticism and satirical irreverence. Other religions, especially Christianity, have to put up with it on a daily basis and their practitioners may complain but they remain civilized and don’t kill anybody or burn down buildings or launch riots over it. Islam and Islam alone reacts in this barbaric and unacceptable way which does nothing but make people despise and distrust Islam even more than they already do.

Q: Did you start to feel this way after the September 11th attacks?

A: No, I felt this way about all religions including Islam years before September 11th, 2001. Back then I was still considered a Liberal and even Liberals would criticize Islam along with other faiths. After the 9-11 attacks American Liberals proved what cowardly hypocrites they were by dropping to their bellies and crawling for Islam while bashing the hell out of Christianity. I’ll never be a Conservative, but I don’t ever want anyone to think that I’m a Liberal given what they’ve turned into. 

Islam for quoteQ: Is there anything that would make Democrats condemn Islam’s homophobia and misogyny the same way they condemn it in other religions?

A: No. Democrats are incapable of that kind of courage and integrity. They’re only good at taking stands on issues that are now safe, like condemning blatant racism and sexism, and pretending that those are still brave stands to take. Besides, you could argue that if they were really opposed to racism and sexism they would speak out on the bigotry of Islam, too.

Q: But is it really the rest of the world’s business to criticize Islam’s treatment of women and gay people?

A: Yes. For the same reason it was the rest of the world’s business to pressure South Africa to end Apartheid. The American Left was vocal about that issue, but hey, that’s because the pro-Apartheid forces in South Africa didn’t roam the globe blowing up people, derailing trains or piloting planes into the sides of buildings. If they had you can bet the American Left’s reaction would have been to drop to their bellies and crawl like they do for Islam, all the while pretending they are taking a “principled stand” about not forcing external values on another culture. Continue reading

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THREE ANCIENT GREEK COMEDIES WITH “PROFESSIONAL ACCUSERS”

AristophanesBalladeer’s Blog frequently examines ancient Greek comedies written by Aristophanes, Cratinus, Eupolis and others. Recently I was put in mind of the way those comedians often satirized the “professional accusers” in the political and legal forums of ancient Athens. 

Ballsey FraudDemagogues like Cleon and Hyperbolus and others often used “professional accusers” against their political opponents. These figures – called sycophantes by the ancient Athenians – are often termed “informers” in many translations of Greek comedies but I feel the word accuser is more accurate.

Such “professional accusers” would hurl scandalous accusations at their secret patron’s political foes, blackening their name in the public’s eyes and often causing them to face court costs, etc. (In English, sycophant has come to mean groveling toady and flatterer but back then the word carried a different meaning.)

Here are three examples: Continue reading

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SPOILER FOR THE NEXT SUPERMAN MOVIE

Balladeer’s Blog’s sources in the industry – and by the industry I mean the business – have provided me with this exclusive storyboard revealing the entire plot of the next Superman movie. Looks like DC’s record of big-screen inanity will hold up! 

Superman kill Prankster

 

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