You can insert your own Phantasm joke here.
IF YOU’RE WONDERING HOW LOIS DIED … Continue reading
Category Archives: humor
SOME RANDOM FRIDAY WEIRDNESS
Filed under humor, Superheroes
FAQ’s ON ISLAM’S HOMOPHOBIA AND MISOGYNY
Muslim Violence Awareness Year continues. Regular readers of Balladeer’s Blog know I’m a non-believer in all of the world’s religions. Most religious practitioners are able to deal with that though some show varying degrees of anger. There is only ONE religion here in the 21st Century that retains the large-scale superstitious savagery of centuries past and that is Islam. I could literally fill this blog every single day with nothing but article after article about Muslim atrocities but the horror of it all would be overwhelming.
At any rate this is the time of year to focus on the fact that there is no god named Allah and Muhammad was a false prophet. It’s also a good time of year to focus on FAQ’s about the most homophobic and misogynistic religion in the world at this particular point in history.
Q: Are you one of those cowardly non-believers who will only criticize Christianity while giving Islam a free pass?
A: No, I criticize all religions and regard them all as fascinating mythology that should never be taken literally. Muslims are the only ones who violently insist their religion should be above that sort of criticism.
THIS HAUNTING IMAGE STRIKES RIGHT TO THE CORE OF THE HATRED THAT IS ISLAM.
Q: Isn’t it, like, mean ‘n’ stuff to criticize somebody’s religion?
A: No, it’s only rational to subject all of the world’s religions to criticism and satirical irreverence. Other religions, especially Christianity, have to put up with it on a daily basis and their practitioners may complain but they remain civilized and don’t kill anybody or burn down buildings or launch riots over it. Islam and Islam alone reacts in this barbaric and unacceptable way which does nothing but make people despise and distrust Islam even more than they already do.
Q: Did you start to feel this way after the September 11th attacks?
A: No, I felt this way about all religions including Islam years before September 11th, 2001. Back then I was still considered a Liberal and even Liberals would criticize Islam along with other faiths. After the 9-11 attacks American Liberals proved what cowardly hypocrites they were by dropping to their bellies and crawling for Islam while bashing the hell out of Christianity. I’ll never be a Conservative, but I don’t ever want anyone to think that I’m a Liberal given what they’ve turned into.
Q: Is there anything that would make Democrats condemn Islam’s homophobia and misogyny the same way they condemn it in other religions?
A: No. Democrats are incapable of that kind of courage and integrity. They’re only good at taking stands on issues that are now safe, like condemning blatant racism and sexism, and pretending that those are still brave stands to take. Besides, you could argue that if they were really opposed to racism and sexism they would speak out on the bigotry of Islam, too.
Q: But is it really the rest of the world’s business to criticize Islam’s treatment of women and gay people?
A: Yes. For the same reason it was the rest of the world’s business to pressure South Africa to end Apartheid. The American Left was vocal about that issue, but hey, that’s because the pro-Apartheid forces in South Africa didn’t roam the globe blowing up people, derailing trains or piloting planes into the sides of buildings. If they had you can bet the American Left’s reaction would have been to drop to their bellies and crawl like they do for Islam, all the while pretending they are taking a “principled stand” about not forcing external values on another culture. Continue reading
THREE ANCIENT GREEK COMEDIES WITH “PROFESSIONAL ACCUSERS”
Balladeer’s Blog frequently examines ancient Greek comedies written by Aristophanes, Cratinus, Eupolis and others. Recently I was put in mind of the way those comedians often satirized the “professional accusers” in the political and legal forums of ancient Athens.
Demagogues like Cleon and Hyperbolus and others often used “professional accusers” against their political opponents. These figures – called sycophantes by the ancient Athenians – are often termed “informers” in many translations of Greek comedies but I feel the word accuser is more accurate.
Such “professional accusers” would hurl scandalous accusations at their secret patron’s political foes, blackening their name in the public’s eyes and often causing them to face court costs, etc. (In English, sycophant has come to mean groveling toady and flatterer but back then the word carried a different meaning.)
Here are three examples: Continue reading
Filed under Ancient Greek Comedy, humor, opinion
SPOILER FOR THE NEXT SUPERMAN MOVIE
Balladeer’s Blog’s sources in the industry – and by the industry I mean the business – have provided me with this exclusive storyboard revealing the entire plot of the next Superman movie. Looks like DC’s record of big-screen inanity will hold up!
Filed under humor, Superheroes
HELEN KILLER
How can you not love the joyous tastelessness of this concept?
Filed under humor, Superheroes
HIGH SCHOOL CAESAR (1960) FOR BACK-TO-SCHOOL TIME
For back-to-school time here’s my review of the 1960 Juvenile Delinquent classic High School Caesar.
HIGH SCHOOL CAESAR (1960) Category: Bad, youth-oriented 1960 movie that is incredibly campy This movie may have a 1960 release date but it is the most classically campy example of the Juvenile Delinquent movies of the 1950’s.
That genre spawned many “so bad they’re good” films like High School Hellcats, Untamed Youth and many others featuring fast cars, silly slang and misunderstood or just plain malevolent teenagers. High School Caesar renders itself even more laughable than other Juvenile Delinquent films with its wonderfully absurd premise.
Yes, this movie takes its cue from the Edward G Robinson gangster movie Little Caesar and depicts the phenomenon of juvenile delinquency as if it’s a High School ROTC version of organized crime.
The title character is a kind of leather-jacketed Don Corleone overseeing a high school operation involving hallway protection rackets, rigged student elections and a black market of stolen exam answers. Continue reading
Filed under Bad and weird movies, humor
JOHN MCCAIN’S FAVORITE TRUMP LINKS
John “Let’s Fight Wars All Over The World” McCain (left)
BLACK TRUMP SUPPORTER PRAISES THE PRESIDENT AND SAYS HE CAN’T KEEP UP WITH ALL THE JOBS HE’S CREATING – Click HERE
EXCELLENT COLUMN POINTING OUT HOW CORRUPT THE MUELLER WITCH-HUNT AGAINST PRESIDENT TRUMP IS – Click HERE
A LOOK AT HOW PRESIDENT TRUMP IS CONNECTING WITH TEENS THROUGH A SHARED CONTEMPT FOR THE AMERICAN MEDIA – Click HERE
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, Neglected History, opinion
ASK BALLADEER: LUCY MAUD MONTGOMERY BOOKS
QUESTION: What is the difference between Anne of Green Gables and Anne of Avonlea?
ANSWER: I think Anne of Avonlea is the one where she fights the Russian boxer.
Got a question for Balladeer? Just let me know.
Filed under humor
ANTIFA IS REALLY KLAN-TIFA
The fascist scumbags and rapists from Antifa are proving the old, old saying that “The fascists of the future will call themselves anti-fascists.” How true! Antifa filth are proving that their name is short for “Anti-Fairness” even though they like to pretend it stands for something else.
The corporate media is trying to pretend it’s (yaaaawwwwn) “racist” to point out that Antifa are fascist thugs. Actually, KLANtifa members seem to be mostly white children of privilege who have a comic book level view of the world. Plus they’re cowards who hide behind masks.
Anyway, those Nazis are part of this latest go-round of Mock News Headlines:
ANTIFA PROMISES TO BEAT UP ALL ELDERLY PEOPLE IN MAGA HATS ON THE GROUNDS THAT IT MAKES THEM FEEL “UNSAFE”
TRUMP-HATERS OUTRAGED THAT NOBODY BUT THEM IS MAD THAT PRESIDENT TRUMP POINTED OUT THEIR LIES YET AGAIN
DEMOCRATS DEMAND THAT MINDLESS AGREEMENT WITH EVERY INSANE THING THAT DEMOCRATS SAY SHOULD BE A CONDITION OF EMPLOYMENT … ANYWHERE, IN ANY JOB
CNN CLAIMS PRESIDENT TRUMP IS TO BLAME FOR THEIR NEVER-ENDING OVEREXPOSURE OF HIM
CORPORATE MEDIA STILL TRYING TO PRETEND THERE IS ANYTHING PRESIDENT TRUMP COULD SAY THAT THEY WOULD NOT DISTORT OR WOULD FIND ACCEPTABLE!
CNN POLL SHOWS THAT PEOPLE WHO HATED PRESIDENT TRUMP YESTERDAY STILL HATE HIM TODAY
CNN REPORTS THAT PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP CAUSED THE END OF THE WORLD TWICE YESTERDAY AND ONCE TODAY ALREADY
REPUBLICAN LINDSEY GRAHAM CALLS ON ANTIFA TO ASSAULT HIS OWN CONSTITUENTS IN THE NAME OF LOVE
CNN SAYS PRESIDENT TRUMP IS THE MOST HITLERISH HITLER WHO HAS EVER HITLERED IN HITLER-LIKE WAYS SINCE HITLER! AND BY THE WAY – HITLER!
DEMOCRATS CALL FOR ROVING MOBS OF ANTIFA RAPISTS TO REPLACE CONVENTIONAL POLICE
CNN ANNOUNCES THEY ARE WORKING ON TECHNOLOGY THAT MAKES VIEWERS SEE PRESIDENT TRUMP IN THEIR SLEEP
ANTIFA THREATENS TO KILL PEOPLE WHO POINT OUT THAT THEY ARE THE BIGGEST FASCISTS IN THE COUNTRY
FEEBLE-MINDED DON LEMON BLAMES HIS ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION ON PRESIDENT TRUMP Continue reading
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, Neglected History, opinion
PRESIDENTIAL LOSERS – PROS AND CONS
Over the years Balladeer’s Blog’s irreverent, tongue-in-cheek looks at the pros and cons of U.S. Presidents have been among my most visited items.
Here’s an encore request for my look at the pros and cons of the LOSERS who were left in a defeated heap enroute to the Oval Office. In reverse order back to just before Tilden:
HILLARY CLINTON (Lost to President Donald Trump)
Motto: “When the money keeps rolling in (to your fake charity), what’s a girl to do? Skim a little (well, quite a lot, actually) off the top for expenses wouldn’t you?”
Nickname: The Rapist’s Wife/ Crooked Hillary
Pro: Her childish refusal to address her own supporters the night Donald Trump utterly humiliated her provided a look at how truly petty, shallow and classless she is.
Con: She and her fascist followers tried to threaten the members of the Electoral College into casting their votes for her instead of Trump, thereby reaching the absolute lowest and most disgusting level that any American politician has ever sunk to.
MITT ROMNEY (Lost to Obama)
Motto: “Pushing women back to the Fifties … the EIGHTEEN fifties!”
Nickname: The Mormon Mondale/ Ol’ Sploog Face (tie)
Pro: His even more pathetic running mate Paul Ryan actually made him look good by comparison.
Con: Was so thoroughly inept he managed to lose to Barack Obama even after voters saw what a disaster he was.
JOHN “Let’s fight wars all over the world” MCCAIN (Lost to Obama)
Motto: “I didn’t spend years in the pockets of the McCain Foundation’s billionaire donors just to watch a candidate even MORE deeply in their pockets beat me … but once Barack did I was happy to kiss his butt!”
Nickname: The Crooked Politician Most Deserving of Contracting Brain Cancer. (Don’t blame me! I’m just the messenger. I can’t help what people call him.) Besides, his nauseating way of behaving like a prick then basically saying “You wouldn’t insult a man who has brain cancer, would ya” is so typical of this bought and paid for Republican worm.
Pro: Soon he will no longer be able to betray his constituents in exchange for bribes. (NOTE: This post was originally put up back in February)
Con: Is often linked to stories about how he collaborated with his North Vietnamese captors to the detriment of his fellow prisoners, some of whom were beaten to death. And refuses to okay the unsealing of his POW files despite frequent calls to do so. Hmmmm.
Plus this racist did more than anyone else to prevent America from having its first African-American president. And he’ll probably use his impending death to take petty shots at his political enemies since he lacks all integrity.
NEW NOTE: Hey, I was right! John “Songbird” McCain and his equally worthless daughter DID use his passing and his funeral for cheap shots at people, relying on people’s courtesy over the passing of an alleged human being to prevent them from striking back. The kind of courtesy that a subhuman like McCain would never show anyone else.
John McCain was filth and the world is a much better place for him no longer being in it. He was a well-known whore and given how he pathetically exploited his disease and his impending death there is no need for anyone to regret pointing out what an utterly useless man he was. Good riddance, Songbird! EVERYONE KNOWS PEOPLE ONLY PRAISED YOU BECAUSE YOU HATED PRESIDENT TRUMP. YOUR CORPSE MADE A CONVENIENT POLITICAL CLUB TO BE USED BY PEOPLE AS LOW AS YOU ALWAYS WERE. Even the worms will gag on your worthless carcass … but I kid vermin like Songbird McCain. Now back to the list of other presidential losers like McCain:
JOHN KERRY (Lost to George W Bush) Continue reading
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion
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