September 8, 2013 · 2:10 pm

COLLEGE FOOTBALL RESULTS FROM SEPTEMBER 7TH, 2013

* EVERYBODY WANTS TO RULE THE WORLD * 

There were so many NCAA Division Two teams upsetting Division ONE teams this past weekend I need an entire section to cover all of them:

Merrimack College helmetTHE WARRIORS CAME OUT TO PLAAA- AAAAAY – Friday night D2’s MERRIMACK COLLEGE WARRIORS got a jump on the weekend’s orgy of upsets. The Warriors traveled to Staten Island to face Division 1’s Wagner College Seahawks under the lights. Both offenses lit up the scoreboard but in the end Merrimack College emerged with a 42-41 triumph in an undeniable Instant Classic!

Delta_StDUEL ON THE MISSISSIPPI RIVER DELTA – On Saturday the DELTA STATE UNIVERSITY STATESMEN from Division Two took it on the road to battle Division One’s Mississippi Valley State University Delta Devils. MVSU may be the alma mater of the legendary Jerry Rice but the Statesmen proved to be more than a match for them, winning a gripping 24-14 gridiron epic.

CSU-PuebloHOW ‘BOUT THEM THUNDERWOLVES? – The COLORADO STATE-PUEBLO THUNDERWOLVES came into yesterday ranked number 6 in Division 2. They battled Division 1’s University of Northern Colorado Bears in a game for the ages. The Thunderwolves’ faithful will be talking about this clash for years as CSU-Pueblo toppled the Bears in their own house by a final score of 41-36.

 Florida Tech Panthers helmetABSOLUTE BEGINNERS – The FLORIDA TECH PANTHERS played their very first intercollegiate football game yesterday. Florida Tech, from Division 2, took on Division 1’s Stetson University Hatters, who were playing just their second football game since reviving their pigskin program this season. Despite the Hatters’ one-game edge in experience the Panthers came out on top in a Continue reading →

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September 7, 2013 · 4:48 pm

AMERICAN LIBERAL MYTHOLOGY: THE SIXTIES

Every war is the Vietnam War!

Every war is the Vietnam War!

Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, the only site on the web that offers non-partisan criticism of those two groups of shrill children called Liberals and Conservatives. This post is part of my series in which I examine the construction of political myths. At this particular point in history American Liberals are more hubristic and in need of criticism so I’ll start with their political myths first. This is the start of a new series.

As we “deconstruct” some of the concepts and figures held sacred by the hilariously pretentious asses of American Liberalism much of the fun will come from the huffy indignation they display when their own outdated value system is subjected to the same critical eye which they use to regard others.

THE 1960s – You’ve heard of the book The Greatest Generation? Well the American youth of the 1960s have earned a name as “the vainest generation” or “the most self-aggrandizing generation.”  The 60s generation has never forgiven the land of their birth for the fact that life was not as simple and pleasant as what they saw on episodes of Father Knows Best or The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet. They grew up … well, American Liberals NEVER grow up, so let’s instead say they “grew older” while Continue reading →

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September 6, 2013 · 10:04 pm

COLLEGE FOOTBALL RESULTS FROM SEPTEMBER 5TH, 2013

* NAIA *

Concordia (NE) BulldogsCONCORDIA- NEBRASKA RULES THE WORLD – As always during college football season every week brings us at least one NAIA team upsetting upper division teams from the NCAA. Last week two teams upset Division ONE teams. Last night the CONCORDIA (NE) BULLDOGS doubled- up on NCAA Division 2’s WILLIAM JEWELL COLLEGE CARDINALS in their own house! The final score in this game was Bulldogs 30  Cardinals 15.

Belleville Lynx helmetTEAMS KICKING BUTT – The BELLEVILLE LYNX are in just their 2nd year of intercollegiate football but are already 2-0 for this season. Last night they notched a road win over the veteran CENTRAL METHODIST UNIVERSITY EAGLES in a 41-14 rout.   ###   Also last night the PIKEVILLE UNIVERSITY BEARS eviscerated the BLUEFIELD COLLEGE RAMBLIN’ RAMS by a final score of 53-16. Bluefield is in just their 2nd year of intercollegiate football as well.  

* NCAA DIVISION 2 *

Northwest_Missouri_StBEARCATS GROWLING – The 3rd ranked NORTHWEST MISSOURI STATE BEARCATS were the highest- ranked D2 team in action last night. These perennial D2 football powers welcomed the number 18 SAGINAW VALLEY STATE CARDINALS and plucked their feathers to the tune of 45-24.

North_Carolina-PembrokeTOP 25 UPSETS – Yesterday saw 2 upsets of ranked teams. The UNC-PEMBROKE BRAVES toppled the visiting 8th ranked WINSTON-SALEM STATE RAMS in a 25-21 nailbiter.   ###   And the SOUTHWESTERN OKLAHOMA BULLDOGS sent the number 25 HARDING UNIVERSITY BISON home stinging from Continue reading →

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September 5, 2013 · 9:29 pm

ISLAM: THE EPITOME OF HOMOPHOBIA, MISOGYNY AND SUPERSTITION

RELIGION KILLS

RELIGION KILLS

It’s no secret that Christianity, Judaism and other religions – laughably irrational as they are – have at least been domesticated to a certain degree. Islam however remains a blood-soaked, untamed beast of a religion and has been retarding the rest of the world’s social progress for an untold number of years now. Given Islam’s savage treatment of women it could be easily argued that this most anachronistic of faiths even continues the practice of slavery long after the rest of the world abandoned that vile institution. The desire of so many Muslims to carry their hate-filled Sharia laws with them wherever they go is especially deserving of criticism.

Islam’s habit of Continue reading →

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September 3, 2013 · 11:00 pm

BAD MOVIE: THE DRAGON LIVES AGAIN (1977)

The Dragon Lives Again

The Dragon Lives Again

THE DRAGON LIVES AGAIN (1977) – Category: Brucesploitation with an enjoyably absurd twist   

Even for the bizarre sub-genre of Brucesploitation films this movie is out there! The film starts with the recently – deceased Bruce Lee arriving in the afterlife, where the concubines of the King of the Dead gather around to gawk at the bulge in the pants of the late martial arts superstar. (Just in case you thought NO opening could be more tasteless than the one in The Clones Of Bruce Lee ) In a bit of alleged comic relief the bulge turns out to be caused by a weapon, not Lee’s organ. (Corpse schlong jokes! Who doesn’t love them?)

As head-shaking as that bit is at least it’s coherent, unlike virtually everything else that happens from this point on in the movie. And the time-honored tradition of Brucesploitation films having Continue reading →

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September 1, 2013 · 3:02 pm

COLLEGE FOOTBALL RESULTS FROM AUGUST 31ST, 2013

No matter what ESPN says, this was the SECOND weekend of college football action. It’s just that they don’t have the contract to broadcast the games in the divisions that kicked off last week.

* NAIA *

William Penn helmetCLASH OF RANKED TEAMS – The 16th ranked WILLIAM PENN UNIVERSITY STATESMEN visited the 9th ranked BETHEL (TN) WILDCATS in the highest profile game of the day. The Statesmen, a perennial power in NAIA football, dominated on both sides of the ball and turned this much-anticipated gridiron clash into a rout. The final score wound up being William Penn 34  Bethel 8.  

Rocky_Mountain_MT_OLD5ROCKY MOUNTAIN HIGH – The ROCKY MOUNTAIN COLLEGE BATTLIN’ BEARS improved to 2-0 yesterday. After defeating Jamestown College back in Week One the Battlin’ Bears took it on the road this weekend and clashed with the number 14 SOUTHERN OREGON UNIVERSITY RAIDERS. After an undeniable Instant Classic of a game Rocky Mountain College emerged with a 35-30 victory.

Southwestern CollegeBITTERSWEEET WELCOME – The OKLAHOMA BAPTIST UNIVERSITY BISON played their first intercollegiate football game yesterday. The SOUTHWESTERN COLLEGE MOUNDBUILDERS came to town to welcome the Bison to NAIA pigskin competition. The Bison played a very respectable game but in the end the experience of the Moundbuilders enabled them to prevail in this 26-22 game for the ages!

Cumberlands_KYBATTLE FOR THE BRASS LANTERN – The 8th ranked UNIVERSITY OF THE CUMBERLANDS PATRIOTS hosted the UNION (KY) BULLDOGS for possession of the Brass Lantern. The Patriots retained this coveted trophy by turning the Bulldogs into their figurative prison brides. It may sound odd for a Union team to lose on Labor Day weekend (rimshot) but Cumberlands crossed Union’s picket lines in a Continue reading →

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August 31, 2013 · 4:55 pm

BARACK OBAMA OR HENRY KISSINGER: WHICH NOBEL “PEACE” PRIZE WINNER KILLED MORE PEOPLE?

As the weak, inept and crooked little man named Barack Obama ponders bombing his Nobel Peace Prize-winning SEVENTH country it seemed like a good time to take a look at the absolute joke that the Peace Prize has become in the past several decades. 

Callous murderer of four human beings at Benghazi just to spare himself embarrassment and inconvenience while running for reelection.

Callous murderer of four human beings at Benghazi just to spare himself embarrassment and inconvenience while running for reelection.

THE KILLER: BARACK OBAMA, (D) – This economy-destroying, healthcare-ruining, job-eliminating and race-baiting demagogue has killed even more people than the repulsive George W Bush did! If Bush’s body-count had been higher he may have qualified for a Nobel Peace Prize himself. In his spare time Obama loves killing people with drone attacks, denying them the due process he insists upon for even the most violent Muslim terrorists.  

MOST HIGH-PROFILE MURDERS: The Continue reading →

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August 30, 2013 · 8:35 pm

COLLEGE FOOTBALL RESULTS FROM AUGUST 29TH, 2013

* NAIA *

Pikeville BearsPIKEVILLE RULES THE WORLD – We aren’t even at Labor Day yet but already we’ve had the 2013 season’s first NAIA team upset of an NCAA Division ONE team! Yesterday the PIKEVILLE UNIVERSITY BEARS played road warriors against Division One’s Morehead State Eagles and came out on top in a 13-10 defensive epic. Every week in college football season sees at least one NAIA (National Association of Intercollegiate Athletics) team topple higher level NCAA teams so stay tuned!

HELMETGrand_View_IAGRAND VIEW UNIVERSITY ALSO RULES THE WORLD!  – What did I tell you about NAIA teams and upsets? Last night saw ANOTHER NAIA team topple an NCAA  Division ONE team in their own house! Iowa’s GRAND VIEW VIKINGS won a 21-16 Instant Classic against Division One’s Drake University Bulldogs. They know how to play football in the NAIA!

MSU- Northern LightsSEEING THE LIGHT(S) – Meanwhile the MONTANA STATE UNIVERSITY- NORTHERN LIGHTS likewise logged a road victory. In the Lights’ case that triumph came against fellow NAIA team the DICKINSON STATE UNIVERSITY BLUE HAWKS in a very memorable 14-0 shutout of Continue reading →

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August 29, 2013 · 10:38 pm

IT! THE TERROR FROM BEYOND SPACE (1958) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT: JULY 12TH, 1986

It! The Terror From Beyond Space

It! The Terror From Beyond Space

IN THE MIDDLE 1980’s/ WAY DOWN ON LEVEL 31 …

Before MST3K there was The Texas 27 Film Vault! Balladeer’s Blog continues its examination of this neglected cult show from the 1980’s. Randy Clower and Richard Malmos, our machine-gun toting members of the Film Vault Corps (“the few, the proud, the sarcastic”) do their usual bit of showing and mocking an old serial then showing and mocking a bad movie.

Thanks to my interview with Randy Clower, the show’s co-creator and co-star and thanks to my research through VERY old newspapers plus emailed memories from other T27FV fans I’m taking a look at another episode of the show where an exact broadcast date can be determined.

ORIGINALLY BROADCAST: Saturday July 12th, 1986 from 10:30pm to 1:00am.

Atom Man vs SupermanSERIAL: Before the night’s movie Randy and Richard would often present old serials. In this episode of the show our “Film Vault Technicians First Class” showed an episode of the 1950 Columbia serial Atom Man vs Superman to be mocked. Kirk Alyn starred as Superman with Lyle Talbot as his archenemy Lex Luthor. Lex has his own secret identity in this serial – each episode he dons a lead mask and oversees the villainy as “Atom Man”.

This was one of the liveliest and most campily watchable serials of the 50′s. Especially laughable are the bits when Superman “flies” – an effect achieved by switching from live footage of Kirk Alyn to INSERTED CARTOON FOOTAGE of Superman flying. Think of the ‘Toons in Roger Rabbit interacting with the live backgrounds and you have the idea.   

FILM VAULT LORE: This episode of The Texas 27 Film Vault was the first to come with a Viewer Discretion warning. Continue reading →

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August 28, 2013 · 9:29 pm

CONSERVATIVE AFRICAN-AMERICANS AND LIBERAL AFRICAN-AMERICANS MARK MLK ANNIVERSARY IN THEIR OWN WAY

Obama: If I had a son he would look like the murderers of Shorty Belton ... and skin color is the ONLY thing that matters to me!

Obama: If I had a son he would look like the murderers of Shorty Belton … and skin color is the ONLY thing that matters to me!

Liberal African-Americans and Conservative African-Americans marked the 50th anniversary of Martin Luther King’s famed 1963 speech in the usual way that American political partisans do. Liberals and Conservatives cheapen everything they touch with their squabbling and this day was no exception. Liberal demagogues like Barack Obama acted like Continue reading →

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