OPENS APRIL 7th AT THE HAWAII INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL SPRING SHOWCASE
Tag Archives: movies
2015: THE YEAR FILMMAKERS GAVE A CRAP
Guess what characteristic Bernie Sanders shares with figures from two 2015 horror films?
What is it this year with filmmakers? Permit me to give you the full poop on an odd new trend in 2015. That new trend: pantloads. First in Unfriended viewers got subjected to a character filling her pants on camera and the new release The Visit also features a character having an accidental bowel movement for the audience.
Even worse is the fact that in The Visit, M Night Shyamalan continues his love of plot twists by having the pantload literally flaunted in another character’s face. Feel free to insert your own “getting shitfaced” joke here. Continue reading
Filed under Bad and weird movies
INDEPENDENCE DAY: TO THE FOURTH POWER
TO THE FOURTH POWER (2013) – This film was one of the sleeper hits of last year. You’d think it would be impossible to do something creative with the mock documentary format at this point but To The Fourth Power proves to be a thought-provoking and inventive piece set “just a few years from now”.
The movie depicts a near future in which the Continue reading
Filed under Fantastic Movie Reviews, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES
FILM REVIEW: TO THE FOURTH POWER (2013)
TO THE FOURTH POWER (2013) – This film was one of the sleeper hits of last year. You’d think it would be impossible to do something creative with the mock documentary format at this point but To The Fourth Power proves to be a thought-provoking and inventive piece set “just a few years from now”.
The movie depicts a near future in which the Continue reading
Filed under Fantastic Movie Reviews
DOCTOR COOK’S GARDEN (1971): BING CROSBY AS A MASS-MURDERING PHYSICIAN
Bing Crosby as the sinister Dr Cook
DOCTOR COOK’S GARDEN – (1971) – Category: Enjoyably campy bad movie elevated by kitsch value in the casting.
Bing Crosby IS Colonel Sanders in Finger Lickin’ Good: A One- Man Show! No, actually Bing plays the title doctor in this made-for- tv movie based on a play by Ira “Rosemary’s Baby” Levin. Trouble is, with the snow-white hair and beard he wears in this telepic Bing looks like he’s supposed to be Colonel Harlan Sanders, inducing laughter in the audience in what is supposed to be a horror/thriller.
Doctor Cook is the seemingly amiable physician in a small Vermont town but in reality he’s a killer with a God Complex, giving
fatal treatment to everyone he considers an Continue reading
Filed under Bad and weird movies
MOVIE REVIEW: TO THE FOURTH POWER (2013)
TO THE FOURTH POWER (2013) – This film may be the sleeper hit of the year. You’d think it would be impossible to do something creative with the mock documentary format at this point but To The Fourth Power proves to be a thought-provoking and inventive piece set “just a few years from now”.
The movie depicts a near future in which the Continue reading
MOVIES NOT COMING SOON TO A THEATRE NEAR YOU
Hollywoodland
Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, the only site on the web that is truly non-partisan in its criticism of those irrational zealots called Liberals and Conservatives. As I have often pointed out in the past there are no such things as right and wrong, there are simply things that a culture finds acceptable and things that a culture frowns upon. Six decades ago Hollywood films conformed to the tired Conservative cliches of Eisenhower’s America and earlier years. Today Hollywood films conform to the tired Liberal cliches of the Political Correctness Police.
In the 1950’s a movie depicting a gay (or black or female) character in the same positive way that the straight (or white or male) characters were depicted would be frowned upon. Today a Hollywood movie depicting a white, straight or (gasp) Christian character in the same positive way that the black, gay or Muslim characters are depicted would be frowned upon.
As always fringe filmmaking is where the courageous storytelling is to be found. The gutless, pandering Hollywood studios all make cookie- cutter movies lacking any sort of diversity in their worldview. Long ago it was uniformly mindless Conservative films being churned out by the dozens. In recent decades it’s been uniformly mindless Liberal films being churned out by the dozens. So let’s proceed with this light- hearted look at movies no Hollywood studio would touch today.
Not Coming Soon – THE CRIMSON IMAM – A heroic Muslim woman dons a red costume and mask, then takes to the streets of her Muslim community punishing men who physically abuse women in the name of the outdated dictates of their religion. Calling herself the Crimson Imam she becomes a nationwide role model and inspires a large-scale feminist movement within Islam. Eventually women and gay people are embraced by Islam, with female clergy and gay marriages commonplace and with abortion rights a new Muslim priority.
What You’d See Instead – THE CRIMSON NUN – A heroic Christian woman dons a red habit and mask, then takes to the streets of her Christian community punishing priests who molest children and Continue reading
Filed under Fantastic Movie Reviews, humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES
MAN IN BLACK REVIEWS HAS BEEN KIND ENOUGH TO ADD ME AS A REVIEWER
Your old buddy Balladeer has been added as a movie reviewer at the eccentric culture site Man In Black Reviews. There’s an entire team of witty and informative reviewers at that site and they cover movies, comics, games, tv, novels and music.
My review of the obscure Philippine monster movies about Zuma (pictured at left) is on their site right now at this link: https://glitternight.com/2011/06/27/bad-movie-page-zuma-1985/
While you’re there check out the other items and add the place to your favorites. It’s what Whitney Houston would have wanted, dammit!
Filed under Bad and weird movies
BAD MOVIE PAGE: HOMEBODIES (1974) – THE INFAMOUS “OLD FOLKS ON A KILLING SPREE” MOVIE
HOMEBODIES (1974) – Category: Enjoyably bad movie with a weird premise This is the film that is always known to me and my fellow bad movie geeks as “the killer fogies movie”. When a group of elderly citizens in their 70’s and 80’s face eviction from their decrepit neighborhood to make way for high- rises they strike back under the leadership of feisty and frightening Mattie, played by Paula Trueman, seen at left.
Homebodies has that nice blend of badness and tastelessness that I love in a horror film. I’m not trying to sound hostile to the elderly, since we will all end up facing the same problems some day, but the Continue reading
Filed under Bad and weird movies
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