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ANDY WARHOL’S FRANKENSTEIN (1973) & ANDY WARHOL’S DRACULA (1974)

frankenstein 3dHalloween Month rolls along here at Balladeer’s Blog with a look at two notoriously bad horror movies which use Andy Warhol’s name despite him not really having anything to do with them and credit Antonio Margheriti as the director even though Paul Morrissey wrote and directed them.

Sophia Loren’s husband Carlo Ponti co-produced both films. 

andy warhols frankensteinANDY WARHOL’S FRANKENSTEIN (1973) – Also known as Flesh for Frankenstein, this 3-D monstrosity and its sister film, Andy Warhol’s Dracula (aka Blood for Dracula) used to be among the most well-known “So Bad They’re Good” movies. Oddly, they fell pretty much off the radar long ago, but get rediscovered every so often and enjoy a brief surge in notoriety from successive generations of horror fans. 

The making of these two grossout movies, which were filmed back-to-back in Italy, would make a better movie than both of them combined in my opinion. Criminal charges, false screen credits and much more behind the scenes lore would help put such a flick up there with Ed Wood and The Disaster Artist.

andy warhol presents frankeThese two movies are also like 1970s time capsules, too. Recently relaxed standards for what could be shown on the big screen yielded a LOT of cheap films that were clearly made just to see how much gory violence and kinky titillation the creative teams could get away with.

Attaching Andy Warhol’s name to this pair of Paul Morrissey flicks helped appeal to pretentious Warhol fans and gave some critics the excuse to read deeper meanings into the sophomoric productions. Suddenly, awkward grossout scenes, idiotic dialogue and non-existent scares were being interpreted as “deconstructions of the Universal monster movies” or as “director/writer Paul Morrissey skewering the very countercultural sex revolutionaries that were among his biggest fans …”

Sheesh! At least purely mercenary splatter film legends like Herschell Gordon Lewis never pretended that their flicks were anything but cash-grabs that piled on the blood and gore.

double featureAndy Warhol’s Frankenstein and Andy Warhol’s Dracula deserve my usual warnings to horror fans who really hate extreme violence and bizarre sex. Don’t go below the “Continue reading” line or you’ll probably regret it. These films are mild compared to Headless or Father’s Day or others I’ve reviewed, but are stomach-turning nonetheless.

So, let’s dive into two of the strangest Dracula and Frankenstein pairings this side of Blacula and Blackenstein. Continue reading

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THE DEVIL OF THE MARSH (1893) HALLOWEEN STORY

damnable talesTHE DEVIL OF THE MARSH (1893) – Written by H.B. Marriott Watson. Halloween Month continues with this review of a short horror piece about a unique female monster who inhabits the marsh. The story was first published in the 1893 collection Damnable Tales.

An unnamed narrator is making his way through the Great Marsh to once again meet with a seemingly beautiful woman with whom he has flirted and fallen in “love”. They have only ever met after dark and on the moors.

So enthralled is our narrator by the woman’s allure that he willingly overlooks all the weirdness of their courtship. After their most recent rendezvous he asked her to run away with him but she insisted that their first act of lovemaking take place deep within the marsh.   
Continue reading

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IN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS (1994) – HORROR FILM REVIEW

Halloween Month continues here at Balladeer’s Blog with a review of an underappreciated gem.

in the mouth of madnessIN THE MOUTH OF MADNESS (1994) – Directed by John Carpenter and written by Michael De Luca, this movie was an unabashed valentine to H.P. Lovecraft, Stephen King’s imitations of Lovecraft, and The King in Yellow by Robert W Chambers. The King in Yellow, of course, is the 1895 book previously reviewed here at Balladeer’s Blog, and which Lovecraft admitted was an influence on his own works.

That story is about the title “king”, or more precisely about a stage play about that monarch. Everyone who reads the play The King in Yellow goes insane, causing worldwide chaos. Some of the King’s minions enter into our dimension to do his evil bidding, but unlike Lovecraft’s tentacled, enormous Old Ones, the monstrous servitors of the King in Yellow are humanoid in size and form.

That out of the way, let’s take it from the top. My LEAST favorite element of this otherwise excellent movie is the way it opens up. We are shown a crazed John Trent (Sam Neill) being committed to an insane asylum. Dialogue makes it clear that he’s just one of many people going mad in a worldwide epidemic of violent insanity. Even some of the staff at the insane asylum seem like they’re not all there anymore.

in the mouth of madness picSoon, Trent is visited in his padded cell, where he has used a black crayon to cover his body and the padded walls with crucifixes for protection. His visitor is Dr Wrenn, played by David Warner, the panicked, crucifix-surrounded man from The Omen, now talking to the panicked, crucifix-surrounded Sam Neill in this film. (I admit that’s a sly touch in keeping with the style of the movie. It even has echoes of the victim in the 1970s film Equinox fixating on his protective crucifix.)   Continue reading

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BALLADEER’S BLOG: COLLEGE FOOTBALL RESULTS FROM OCTOBER 21st

HEADLINES

Virginia U of Lynchburg Dragons GOODNCCAA OVER NCAA DIVISION TWO – This game pitted the NCCAA’s VIRGINIA UNIVERSITY OF LYNCHBURG DRAGONS against their hosts, D2’s LANE COLLEGE DRAGONS. VUL was chasing Lane College 28-21 at Halftime and 42-35 in the 3rd Quarter. The 4th saw VU-Lynchburg pull off a 45-42 come from behind Upset.

Monroe College Mustangs helmetNJCAA OVER USCAA – In another Upset, NJCAA team the MONROE COLLEGE MUSTANGS welcomed the NEWPORT NEWS APPRENTICE SCHOOL BUILDERS (Shipbuilders) from the USCAA. A 14-14 tie at the Half became 21-21 to end the 3rd Quarter and ultimately a 28-21 triumph for the Mustangs.

Augustana Vikings helmetDOWN GOES NUMBER FOUR – In NCAA Division Two action, the 21st ranked AUGUSTANA (SD) VIKINGS took on the visiting number 4 team in the nation – the MINNESOTA STATE MAVERICKS. After a scoreless opening Quarter, the Vikings led 7-3 at the midpoint and 14-3 in the 3rd Quarter. In the 4th, Augustana U. toppled the Mavericks 28-10. Continue reading

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THE SPOOK (1974-1975) – FROM ICONIC EERIE MAGAZINE

This weekend’s superhero blog post will go with the Halloween theme. The Spook was one of the recurring characters in Warren Publications’ iconic magazine Eerie.

eerie spookEERIE #57 (June 1974)

Title: Stridespider Sponge-Rot

Oh, what is the fungus that digests moist wood? 

STRIDESPIDER SPONGE-ROT!

The xylophagus fungus that eats what it should

STRIDESPIDER SPONGE-ROT!

Breaks down hemicellulose all well and good

STRIDESPIDER SPONGE-ROT!

Okay, I’ll stop right there. Had to be done, though. We were all thinking it.

vampirellaNOTE: Warren Publications are fondly remembered for their horror and sci-fi magazines like Creepy, Eerie, 1984 and Vampirella (at right). As magazines and not comic books, Warren’s output was not limited by the comics code and could therefore delve into adult themes and intense violence.

        Marvel Comics even imitated Warren for a while in the 1970s with their own magazine-sized publications with black & white interior art, like Vampire Tales, Haunt of Horror, etc.

        Which brings us back to Eerie #57, in which one of the stories introduced the magazine’s latest recurring character the Spook. Continue reading

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THE LIVING MUMMY (1910) HALLOWEEN READING

living mumy prattTHE LIVING MUMMY (1910) – Written by Australian author Ambrose Pratt. Dr. Pinsent, a two-fisted young archeologist, is running an expedition in the sands of Egypt. The beautiful May Ottley and her father, an accomplished archeologist himself, ask Pinsent to lend them some of his workmen for a few days.

Dr. Ottley has found the tomb of the priest Ptahmes from the 18th Dynasty. Pinsent lends Ottley some workers, but mostly so he can try courting May. At length the mummy of Ptahmes is found, but an examination of it reveals that it was not mummified in the traditional way – after death. Instead, it appears that Ptahmes was placed in suspended animation while still living. Continue reading

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BRIAN MAY, JUST FOR SOME LAUGHS

I saw this floating around the internet, so here it is. I’ll have another post later today. 

brian may

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COOL WEST COAST LEAGUE BASEBALL TEAMS

p pickles mascThe West Coast League is a baseball league consisting of American and Canadian teams. For the U.S. Washington and Oregon are represented, and for Canada British Columbia and Alberta are represented.

College athletes hoping to enhance their resumes for potential pro careers compete in the league’s schedule of games from June through August every year so as not to interfere with their college team’s slate of games.

Here are some of the WCL’s coolest team names and logos.

walla walla sweetsWALLA WALLA SWEETS

Location: Walla Walla, WA

Founded: 2009

Comment: The team name comes from Walla Walla Sweet Onions. Continue reading

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COFFIN JOE MOVIE POSTERS FOR HALLOWEEN SEASON

coffin joe picAs Halloween Month continues, Balladeer’s Blog presents another seasonal post. Over the years I’ve reviewed plenty of the horror films made by Brazil’s King of Horror since the 1960s – Coffin Joe (Ze do Caixao) aka Jose “Mojica” Marins. I’ve even reviewed his colleague “Ivan the Terrible’s” movie The Secret of the Mummy from 1982.

This blog post will look at some of the more memorable Coffin Joe movie posters over the decades.

at midnight iAT MIDNIGHT I’LL TAKE YOUR SOUL (1963)

“Filmed in glorious black and white” as they used to say, this was not only Brazil’s first ever home-grown horror film, but it also presented the debut of Marins’ iconic character Coffin Joe. I still believe that this master of menace deserves to be as well-known as the likes of Freddy Krueger, Pinhead, or even Coffin Joe’s fellow mortician the Tall Man. Continue reading

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JOHN CARPENTER’S “VAMPIRES” (1998)

vampiresJOHN CARPENTER’S VAMPIRES (1998) – Halloween Month rolls along with this look at John Carpenter directing James Woods as Vatican-sanctioned vampire hunter Jack Crow. As always, James Woods is like a force of nature. When he’s on the screen he virtually blows away most of the people with whom he shares that screen. 

Years before the movie Van Helsing came this flick about a team of vampire hunters secretly working with the Vatican to safeguard the world from a threat the public believes doesn’t exist. Carpenter made a perfect choice in casting volatile genius Woods as the leader of the vampire slayers. Jack Crow’s hatred of the bloodsuckers and the suffering they cause is like a thing alive.

Jack, his right-hand man Anthony Montoya (Daniel Baldwin) and the rest of their team wipe out a vampire coven in Mexico only to have its elusive leader Jan Valek (Thomas Ian Griffith) come after them for revenge. Continue reading

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