Tag Archives: movie reviews

DJANGO THEATER: A LOOK AT THE FILMS OF THE MOST DURABLE SPAGHETTI WESTERN GUNSLINGER

The best Django, Franco Nero, played the gunslinger in Django, Django Strikes Again and (wink) Django’s Grand Return

Like Tarzan, James Bond and Sherlock Holmes the melancholy bounty hunter Django has been presented in various incarnations and with wildly differing continuity. And like soccer the Django movies have been an enormous success almost everywhere except the U.S. The gunman’s most recent iteration will be as an African American in Django Unchained, Quentin Tarantino’s upcoming reboot of the Spaghetti Western hero’s saga.

The great Franco Nero created the role in 1966 in a film so popular in Europe (but banned in the UK for its still- controversial violence) that it spawned a legion of sequels. Some sequels starred Franco Nero or others in the role of Django, while others were just unrelated westerns whose distributors simply  attached a phony Django title to them, sometimes redoing the dubbing to have the lead character referred to as Django, other times not bothering.

Original Django poster In anticipation of the mad rush for the various Django films that will presumably follow the release of the Tarantino reboot with Jamie Foxx Balladeer’s Blog helpfully presents a synopsis of the films featuring (legitimately or not) the most durable Eurowestern hero of them all. And, yes, if you’re wondering, the western bounty hunter Django was indeed the reason George Lucas named that outer space bounty hunter Jango Fett.

DJANGO (1966) – In 1867 Mexico Django, a veteran of the Union army in the Civil War, seeks revenge on Major Jackson, the Confederate officer behind his wife’s death. Jackson and his still-loyal troops, now turned  outright Klansmen, are, like so many other fleeing Confederates,  fighting for the Mexican Emperor Maximillian in the war to keep his throne.   Django battles Jackson’s hooded thugs, even ambushing dozens with the Gatling Gun he keeps concealed in a coffin. When he’s out of men Major Jackson calls on Maximillian’s Imperial troopers for reinforcements and prepares to face Django and the Mexican rebel troops he’s fallen in with. For a detailed review of this unforgettable film click here: https://glitternight.com/2012/08/08/the-original-django-and-two-blaxploitation-westerns-a-primer-for-django-unchained/

DJANGO SHOOTS FIRST (1966) – AKA He Who Shoots First. Django comes into an enormous inheritance from his murdered father, an inheritance he learns he must share with his late father’s unscrupulous business partner, Mr Cluster. Django starts blowing away a host of bad guys as he tries to piece together who is responsible for his father’s death.

DJANGO, A BULLET FOR YOU (1966) – Django uses his guns to protect a group of downtrodden farmers from the villainous, land-grabbing town boss of Wagon Valley. He Continue reading

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BAD MOVIE PAGE: THE NEWLYDEADS (1987)

 I recently received an email requesting that I review the hilariously bad 1987 horror film The Newlydeads. As it happens I reviewed that flick in 2010, so here it is again. As a reminder to new readers if you want an immediate bad movie fix on a particular film you can check my Bad Movie page to see if I’ve reviewed it already. Here is the link: https://glitternight.com/bad-movies/

THE NEWLYDEADS (1987) – Category: A neglected bad movie classic that deserves a Plan 9-sized cult following   This film is about an undead transvestite slasher called Jackie who preys on the couples at a honeymoon hotel. Hey, if the Sleepaway Camp horror films can have the Continue reading

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SILVERADO: THE OFFICIAL WESTERN OF FRONTIERADO

 SILVERADO (1985) – I’ve never made any secret about how Silverado is, to me, the official movie of this holiday. The film has all the high spirits and family appeal of Star Wars plus the well-choreographed action scenes of Raiders of the Lost Ark. On top of that Silverado features all the  highly stylized gunplay of the best Spaghetti Westerns but NOT the mud, blood, sweat and brutality of that genre. This movie is pure escapism and features the kind of preternaturally accurate gunslingers that I jokingly  describe as “Jedi Knights in the Olllld West”.

These guys (as well as most of the villains) can literally shoot the needles off a cactus, simultaneously draw and shoot with pin-point accuracy and can just “sense” when some low-down hombre might be pulling a gun on them, even with their back turned and from half a room away.    

Scott Glenn and Kevin Costner portray brothers Emmet and Jake, Danny Glover portrays their African-American friend Mal, and Kevin Kline has the most layered role as the gambler/gunfighter called Paden. In the Continue reading

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FRONTIERADO: THE TOP FOUR WESTERNS BASED ON REAL-LIFE FIGURES

We all know that in real life the celebrated “heroes” of the old west were a pack of corrupt and/or outrightly criminal thugs who would have had a pretty redneckish worldview. And let’s face it, by our standards their personal hygiene habits would have been pretty disgusting. But since the Frontierado holiday is all about celebrating the myth of the West and not the grinding reality of it here’s my list of the Top Four Westerns Based On Real-Life Figures. Coming up with lists like this is one of the perks of being the international commissioner of Frontierado (along with the seven-figure income and a staff of three hundred people).

1. BUTCH CASSIDY AND THE SUNDANCE KID (1969) – Redford and Newman set the standard for the “buddy western” with this magnificent movie. Newman once described this flick by saying “It’s a Continue reading

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FRONTIERADO MOVIE: BLACK NOON (1971)

 Frontierado is coming up very quickly! Bigger than Life Day, trendier than Festivus, Frontierado falls on Friday, August 3rd this year. Veteran readers of Balladeer’s Blog know all about the joys of the Frontierado season, but newbies will be treated to their first-ever countdown to one of the grandest holidays of them all!

Per tradition I’m starting the countdown with a look at some Weird Westerns and as the happy day draws nearer I’ll examine more serious elements of Frontierado lore. For readers who want to find out what they’ve been missing click here: https://glitternight.com/2010/07/28/just-9-more-shopping-days-until-frontierado/ 

BLACK NOON – (1971) – Roy Thinnes stars as an Old West preacher who runs afoul of a practicing coven of witches. These witches operate out of a western town called Melas (three guesses) and provide Thinnes and his wife sanctuary after their wagon breaks down on their way west. Everything seems okay at first, but gradually it becomes clear that Continue reading

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BAD MOVIE PAGE: THE BABY (1973)

 The encore presentation of my review of the 70’s cult horror bomb The Baby, originally from 2010, is up now at Man In Black Reviews.

THE BABY (1973) – Category: The 70’s version of camp, with a premise and plot elements that would have been banned in previous decades.       It’s hard to believe Ted Post was involved with this strange movie. It was considered very weird and kinky even in the 1970’s when it came out, and that was long before the internet made the entire world aware of the infantilism fetish that this film reeks of! “Baby” himself redefines the expression “arrested development”, since he’s a full-grown adult who crawls around in a diaper (which needs changing occassionally – all together now – Eeewwwww!), sleeps in a big crib, eats baby food and Continue reading

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BAD MOVIE PAGE: DRIVE-IN MASSACRE (1976)

 DRIVE-IN MASSACRE (1976) – Category: Gimmick movie worth watching once, but never again     

This movie has that certain charm to it that most low-budget 70’s horror films possess. When watching Drive-In Massacre you can’t help but reflect on the fact that the talent of John Carpenter is the only thing separating his milestone film Halloween from the many other 1970’s slice and dice films like this one. 

The plot of Drive-In Massacre involves a Continue reading

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BAD MOVIE PAGE – ATTACK OF THE BEAST CREATURES (1983)

I got an e-mail request for me to review this film, but I did last year, but here it is since I always do what I can to satisfy requests. For more bad movie reviews click here: https://glitternight.com/bad-movies/

Attack of the Beast Creatures (1983)ATTACK OF THE BEAST CREATURES (1983)- Category: A neglected bad movie classic that deserves a Plan 9-sized cult following.       Some passengers from a Transatlantic liner get shipwrecked and marooned on an uncharted island filled with acidic ponds and streams plus a whole tribe of the titular creatures who all look like the doll that attacked Karen Black in Trilogy Of Terror. And it’s the 1920′s for no reason whatsoever! Nothing in the story has Continue reading

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BAD MOVIE PAGE – ZUMA (1985)

 ZUMA (1985) – Category: Enjoyably bad movie elevated by its obscurity value      

There’s an old saying that goes “Once you have a big green bald guy with pythons growing out of his neck you never go back.” Or something to that effect. This monstrous figure is Zuma himself, the Freddy Krueger of the Philippines in the 1980s. Big, muscular and green like the Hulk, bald like Mr Clean and with pythons growing out of his neck like the late Michael Jackson. (Disclaimer: The preceding remark is probably not true)

Originally a comic book character in the Philippines, Zuma took the film industry of the islands by storm with his debut film in 1985 and a sequel in 1987. Copies of these films have been Continue reading

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BAD MOVIE PAGE: THE PINK ANGELS (1971)

 THE PINK ANGELS (1971) – Category – The 70’s version of camp with a premise and plot elements that would have been banned in previous decades   

The Pink Angels is the notoriously weird movie about a gay biker gang. Despite the many sites that claim this was a 1976 movie it was actually first released in 1971, during the biker movie craze started by Roger Corman’s Hell’s Angels flicks. This is not a gay-bashing film. Instead, it’s in the tradition of the many “anti-establishment” films from back then with the gay bikers presented in a sympathetic way and the “straights” as the heavies.

Fans of bad movies will recognize many of the faces – John Alderman, from Black Godfather, Trader Hornee and countless other bizarre films, is the leader of the Pink Angels. Tom Basham, who played the mass-murdering kiddie show host Mr Rabbey in Psychopath (reviewed previously on my Bad Movie Page) portrays one of the Angels, as does Continue reading

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