Labor Day weekend seemed like the appropriate time to post my long-delayed look at neglected working class folk hero Joe Magarac. This figure was the Steel Mill equivalent of Paul Bunyan and John Henry.
Though mostly associated with Polish-American steel workers in Pittsburgh, PA the general figure of a literal “man of steel” helping and protecting his coworkers can be found from the East Coast through the American Midwest. Sometimes the figure is Croation or some other ethnicity instead of Polish.
Written versions of Joe Magarac and/or similar steel worker tall tales seem to have started around 1930 or 1931. Oral legends about such figures – but not specifically Joe Magarac – have been dated as early as the 1890s.
Vintage advertisements from tattered old newspapers indicate that such Man of Steel imagery may have been used for the steel industry prior to World War One. This “Which came first, the chicken or the egg” dilemma for Joe Magarac and other Steel Men puts one in mind of the quandary surrounding Billiken lore.
As a lame play on words since this is Labor Day season I’ll present Joe Magarac’s origin and then depict his tales as “Labors” like in The Labors of Hercules.
BIRTH – Joe Magarac supposedly sprang into existence from a mound of iron ore and – depending on the version – that mound was either in Pittsburgh or the Old Country. Magarac emerged from the melting mound fully grown and spoke broken English like so many of the other Polish steel workers. He was called into being by the urgent need to catch up on production since the current shift had fallen dangerously behind.
Joe was 7 or 8 feet tall, his flesh was like solid steel, his torso was as wide as a smoke-stack and his arms were as thick as railroad ties. His surname Magarac meant “mule” in the workhorse sense, referring to his stamina. Joe’s appetite was such that he carried his lunch in a washtub instead of a standard lunch box.
Magarac’s favorite leisure time activity was polka-dancing and halushkis were his favorite food.
THE LABORS OF JOE MAGARAC: Continue reading
QUESTION: What is the difference between Anne of Green Gables and Anne of Avonlea? 
ANOTHER NAIA TRIUMPH OVER NCAA D2 – The UNIVERSITY OF PIKEVILLE BEARS are the latest NAIA team to defeat an NCAA Division Two team. (For newbies that’s like when a 1AA team upsets a 1A team) Their opponents were D2’s LIVINGSTONE COLLEGE BLUE BEARS, for a sort of “Bear Necessities Bowl.” The University of Pikeville utterly destroyed visiting Livingstone College by a score of FIFTY-TWO to TWENTY-THREE! 
NUMBER TEN GOES DOWN – NCAA Division Two’s number 10 team in the nation – the UNIVERSITY OF INDIANAPOLIS GREYHOUNDS – took it on the road last night against the 14th ranked GRAND VALLEY STATE LAKERS. The Lakers were clearly feeling their dynastic past as they dominated on both sides of the ball while clobbering the Greyhounds 30-7. 
Episode Title: FREE FOR ALL 
Needless to say our protagonist figures this election nonsense is just another experimental Head Game of the Villagekeepers. His suspicion increases when he sees that the Villagekeepers had already printed up campaign posters for him and distributed them to all the other Villagers. Despite our main character’s misgivings he gets swept along in this new cerebral duel with his captors. 
The number 4 team in the nation – the INDIANA UNIVERSITY OF PENNSYLVANIA CRIMSON HAWKS – will be on the road against the 16th ranked ASHLAND UNIVERSITY EAGLES. 
The 19th ranked UNIVERSITY OF CENTRAL MISSOURI MULES travel to take on the number 9 FORT HAYS STATE TIGERS in a sure gridiron bloodbath. 
Over the years Balladeer’s Blog’s irreverent, tongue-in-cheek looks at the pros and cons of U.S. Presidents have been among my most visited items. 
HILLARY CLINTON (Lost to President Donald Trump)
Pro: Her childish refusal to address her own supporters the night Donald Trump utterly humiliated her provided a look at how truly petty, shallow and classless she is. 
JOHN “Let’s fight wars all over the world” MCCAIN (Lost to Obama)
Pro: Soon he will no longer be able to betray his constituents in exchange for bribes. (NOTE: This post was originally put up back in February)
NEW NOTE: Hey, I was right! John “Songbird” McCain and his equally worthless daughter DID use his passing and his funeral for cheap shots at people, relying on people’s courtesy over the passing of an alleged human being to prevent them from striking back. The kind of courtesy that a subhuman like McCain would never show anyone else. 
John McCain was filth and the world is a much better place for him no longer being in it. He was a well-known whore and given how he pathetically exploited his disease and his impending death there is no need for anyone to regret pointing out what an utterly useless man he was. Good riddance, Songbird! EVERYONE KNOWS PEOPLE ONLY PRAISED YOU BECAUSE YOU HATED PRESIDENT TRUMP. YOUR CORPSE MADE A CONVENIENT POLITICAL CLUB TO BE USED BY PEOPLE AS LOW AS YOU ALWAYS WERE. Even the worms will gag on your worthless carcass … but I kid vermin like Songbird McCain. Now back to the list of other presidential losers like McCain:
NORTH EAST GRAPEPICKERS 
NORTHAMPTON KONKRETE KIDS 
DANVILLE IRONMEN
I guess technically this could have been one of my Ask Balladeer segments. Some readers and fellow Harry Flashman fans reacted to my speculative look at what George MacDonald Fraser might have had in mind for Flashman’s U.S. Civil War adventures by asking me how I’d have handled it. Some were just curious, others were ticked off that I dared to criticize what I saw as Fraser forcing Harry into WAY too many Civil War incidents. So here we go with how I’d have handled it:
THE SET-UP: In February or March of 1862 Flashman has been back in England with his wife Elspeth since the spring of 1861, following his involvement in the Taranaki War in New Zealand. 
