Evading his foe’s lethal flatulence cloud the Black Condor defeated him with a super-wedgie.
I SINCERELY APOLOGIZE FOR LETTING MY INNER FIVE-YEAR OLD TAKE OVER FOR THIS INSTALLMENT OF BLACK CONDOR CAPTIONING FUN.
Category Archives: humor
THE FIVE MOST DARING MOVIES AND TV SHOWS OF 2014
Here at Balladeer’s Blog I like to save up my lists about highlights of the year until after the year is officially completed. Here’s a look at the most truly irreverent and iconoclastic pieces of work from the year just past. The number one entry will shock you.
Would ALEC BALDWIN find the plot of this movie a little too close to reality?
5. THE WORLD’S A STAGE – Yes, I know this film was not the most daring of things, but that’s why it’s in last place on the list. The World’s A Stage still went where other movies fail to go in this age of celebrity worship. Actors in a popular political drama let their roles go to their heads and begin putting on airs as if they are as authoritative as the characters they play.
The foolish voters actually think the actors and actresses must have real gravitas and elect them to high office with hilariously disastrous results. The idiocy of taking shallow, uninformed and emotionally unstable celebrities seriously when it comes to complex real-world issues is magnificently lampooned in this comedy. Think Aristophanes or Eupolis but in a 21st Century setting. FOR MY FULL-LENGTH REVIEW CLICK HERE: https://glitternight.com/2014/02/26/movie-review-the-worlds-a-stage-2014/
4. AGENTS OF I.S.L.A.M. – This television series was like the flip side of Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. The title organization, I.S.L.A.M. (Intolerant Savages Loathing All Modernity) were violent practitioners of a blood-soaked religion which was never named on the show. Various fan theories developed over what religion was being criticized by the program.
The television series depicted agents of I.S.L.A.M. roaming the world and beheading people, mutilating the genitals of women, slitting the throats of infants and countless other acts of random violence against innocent human beings. This was the must-see show of 2014 but the creative team behind the program better stop being so coy in 2015 and finally reveal what religion the show is referring to. FOR MY FULL-LENGTH REVIEW CLICK HERE: https://glitternight.com/2014/07/02/new-television-series-agents-of-i-s-l-a-m/ Continue reading
Filed under Fantastic Movie Reviews, humor, opinion
SABRINA RUBIN ERDELY CAPTIONING FUN
“How about if I change the story to say the rapists were all conservatives? Or Republicans named Barry? Or better yet, Christians? Or how about if they were all gamers or if they all played football for the Washington Redskins?”
Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES
LENA DUNHAM’S REAL PARENTS REVEALED!
A BALLADEER’S BLOG EXCLUSIVE SCOOP! SHE MOSTLY RESEMBLES HER FATHER, THOUGH.
COURTESY OF THAT ANCESTRY SITE! FOR MORE PHOTO AND CAPTIONING FUN CLICK HERE: Continue reading
Filed under humor
LENA DUNHAM CAPTIONING FUN
WHITE CHILD OF PRIVILEGE LENA DUNHAM HAS ANNOUNCED SHE WILL BE STARRING IN A REMAKE OF “ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING”.
THIS COMES AFTER THE PUBLIC FAILURE OF HER SONG AND MUSIC VIDEO “WHEN I’M WITH MY UNDERAGED SISTER I TOUCH MYSELF” AND A RECENT VIRAL VIDEO IN WHICH SHE WALKED AROUND NEW YORK FOR TEN HOURS DURING WHICH TIME ABSOLUTELY NOBODY CATCALLED HER.
Filed under humor
POPE FRANCIS CAPTIONING FUN
Pope Francis, after carefully consulting with the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy, announced that the Big Bang could not have happened without a god.
Filed under humor
FLASH: THE MOST HATED MAN ALIVE PART THREE
HER CAMPAIGN FAILING MISERABLY, WENDY DAVIS DECIDED TO TRY HER MOST AUDACIOUS REWRITING OF HER PAST YET, MUCH TO FLASH’S CHAGRIN.
Filed under humor
PART 2 OF FLASH: THE MOST HATED MAN ALIVE
WHEN FLASH WAS KILLED BY A MUSLIM FANATIC THE PRESIDENT ORDERED EVERYONE TO ACT LIKE NOTHING HAPPENED AND THE SHEEPLIKE CITIZENS OBEYED.
Filed under humor
FLASH: THE MOST HATED MAN ALIVE
THE CITIZENS OF CENTRAL CITY WERE FINE WITH FLASH’S LOOTING SPREE BUT WHEN HE SAID HE MISSED THE BCS THEY DECIDED THEY’D HAD ENOUGH!
FOR CAPTIONS FEATURING BALLADEER’S BLOG’S OFFICIAL SUPERHERO THE BLACK CONDOR CLICK HERE: Continue reading
Filed under humor
ANNE RICE’S HUMPTY DUMPTY
Humpty Dumpty sat on the wall. The wall was where Humpty Dumpty had decided to sit. Humpty Dumpty could be found on the wall, sitting. Sitting was the activity Humpty Dumpty was engaging in and the wall was the place he had chosen to sit. Everyone agreed that the wall was where Humpty Dumpty was sitting. It was of no avail to wistfully pretend that Humpty Dumpty was seated elsewhere. With an air of resignation all and sundry were forced to agree that the wall, despite how much they might desperately wish for it to be otherwise, was indeed where Humpty Dumpty sat.
The wall had first been constructed eighty-seven years earlier by two laborers named Stanislaw and Ernst. Throughout his workday Stanislaw often reflected on how he might think of Ernst as the most beautiful man in the world, if not for the fact that, if the truth be known, he considered Ernst to be the most physically repugnant man he had ever seen. Or smelled, for that matter. Still, though, Stanislaw couldn’t help but wonder and it made his pulse quicken each and every time.
Stanislaw wondered what it would be like to be a voluptuously beautiful young blonde woman – or, in his more kittenish moods a redhead – and to have Ernst take him and smother him with kisses, and all the while he would helplessly struggle to free himself from both of Ernst’s tanned, muscular arms. But then he would remember that that dream was impossible – Ernst only had one arm. Everyone agreed that this was so. Ernst was a man who had lost one arm and therefore had only one arm left. If one were to describe a man with two arms there was no denying the fact that it could not be Ernst whom they were thus describing. After all, as everyone from both far and near knew … Ernst had only one arm. And it was beautiful. Continue reading
Filed under humor
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