Category Archives: Bad and weird movies

January 19, 2015 · 11:39 pm

CASEY JAMES AND BALLADEER EXAMINE BATWOMAN (1968)

International sex symbol Casey James, Balladeer's Blog's Official Movie Hostess.

International sex symbol Casey James, Balladeer’s Blog’s Official Movie Hostess.

Special thanks to Balladeer’s Blog’s Official Movie Hostess, the beautiful Casey James, as she helps present another look at a bad or weird superhero film. This time around the subject is the 1968 Mexican film Batwoman (La Mujer Murcielago).

Batwoman 1For starters this should NOT be confused with the Jerry Warren film The Wild, Wild World of Batwoman, but often is because Warren was the stateside distributor for plenty of Mexican films in the 50s and 60s. This movie is purely a Luchadora film with Batwoman being a wrestler as well as a seasoned crime fighter.   

It’s not quite fair to call this a “bad” film, but it is a bit of a weird one. In my view it’s much tighter and more entertaining than most of the El Santo movies from Mexico. And I’m not just saying that because of how incredibly sexy the star Maura Monti is. She has an arresting (see what I did there) figure that’s perfect for her version of the Batwoman outfit: a bikini, boots, mask and cape. 

Batwoman 2Like the Turkish movie Three Dev Adam, which features Spider-Man, Captain America and El Santo, this little honey did not pay for character rights but slipped under the radar long ago thanks to its south-of-the- border origins. Maura Monti has a certain screen presence that was lacking in other Luchadora flicks like Wrestling Women vs the Aztec Mummy. And this movie is nowhere near the embarrassment that Halle Berry’s Catwoman was. Continue reading →

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December 30, 2014 · 8:20 pm

BAD MOVIES FOR THIS NEW YEAR’S EVE

Here at Balladeer’s Blog I’m very fond of cinematic turkeys that have seasonal tie-ins. Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas bombs have gotten ample attention from me, so permit me to follow those items up with this look at bad movies with a New Year’s Eve theme. As usual, full-length reviews of these films can be found on my Bad Movie page.

AKA Time Warp

AKA Time Warp

BLOODY NEW YEAR (1987) – Also released under the title Time Warp but it’s grisly enough for the more explicit title. A handful of British boaters who are fleeing a family of soccer hooligans (no, really) wind up on an island with a deserted hotel that’s been decorated for a New Year’s Eve party since the 1950’s. This Norman J Warren film stars nobody and borrows heavily from Sam Raimi’s original Evil Dead in terms of its imitation “Deadites” and its POV tracking shots. It also features a killer who emerges from a movie being watched, a monster who climbs out of a tablecloth, homicidal kitchen utensils, indoor snowfall, laughing shrubbery and living walls. All the chaos is being caused by hapless souls who have been trapped in limbo for decades and will do anything to get out or to drag others into their hellish undead existence with them.

Bloody New Year is a neglected bad movie classic that has all the Continue reading →

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December 17, 2014 · 12:03 am

CHRISTMAS SEASON BAD MOVIES WITH THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

Randy Clower (right) with co-host Richard Malmos as "Film Vault Technicians First Class" on The Texas 27 Film Vault

Randy Clower (right) with co-host Richard Malmos as “Film Vault Technicians First Class” on The Texas 27 Film Vault. They’re way down on Level 31. No, not Deep 13 – Level 31.

Randy Clower and Richard Malmos of The Texas 27 Film Vault (both lower right) featured in a Movie Host article with Stella from Saturday Night Dead and Elvira.

Randy Clower and Richard Malmos of The Texas 27 Film Vault (both lower right) featured in a Movie Host article with Stella from Saturday Night Dead and Elvira.

Regular readers of Balladeer’s Blog know The Texas 27 Film Vault was a great pre-MST3K bad movie show from the mid-1980’s. The hosts Randy Clower and Richard Malmos (also the co-creators of the program) were members of the fictional quasi-military outfit called the Film Vault Corps – “the few, the proud, the sarcastic”. Ken Miller, who played the gung-ho Kilgore-esque Tex on the show was also a co-creator. Tragically Miller commited suicide in 1988.   

The Texas 27 Film Vault aired for 2 and 1/2 hours every Saturday night from 10:30pm to 1:00 am with Randy, Richard, Tex, Joe The Hypnotic Eye Riley and Laurie Savino the Mystery Clip Technician showing and mocking episodes of old Republic and Columbia serials before showing and mocking the night’s bad or campy movie.

Texas and Oklahoma loved this cult show and it’s rare for Longhorns and Sooners to agree on anything! Here’s a look at the Christmas and New Year’s themed episodes of The Texas 27 Film Vault! 

To All A Good nightTO ALL A GOOD NIGHT (1980)

Original Broadcast Date: December 28th, 1985

Serial: Flash Gordon Conquers the Universe (1940) 

Host Segments: A look at Christmas-themed horror films. 

Movie: To All a Good Night features Jennifer Runyon AND Harry Reems of all people. A slasher in a Santa Claus costume kills several co-eds as well as the inept cops who come to protect them. High body count but many of the killings are lit too poorly to see clearly plus one character goes nuts and literally just does a ballet dance for the final 15 or so minutes of the movie. Alex Rebar of The Incredible Melting Man fame wrote the screenplay and The Last House on the Left‘s David Hess directed.  

Continue reading →

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December 3, 2014 · 3:02 pm

SANTO VERSUS THE RIDERS OF TERROR (1970): PRESENTED BY SEXY CASEY JAMES

Special thanks once again to Balladeer’s Blog’s Official Movie Hostess, the legendarily lovely Casey James! Casey is introducing my latest look at a bad superhero movie.

Santo vs the Riders of Terror 2SANTO VERSUS THE RIDERS OF TERROR (1970) – Called Santo Contra Los Jinetes del Terror in its native Mexico, this is one of my all-time favorite hidden gems among the wacked-out movies about Mexican wrestler and superhero El Santo.    

El Santo – often called “Samson” in English-dubbed versions of his flicks – has battled Martians, vampire women, vampire men, witches, mummies, wax figures come to life and dozens of other monstrosities. This particular flick stands out to me because of its joyously tasteless brand of “monsters” – a horseback riding outlaw gang of lepers.

Yes, LEPERS! In a move even Tod Slaughter might have deemed too exploitative a group of bandits deformed by leprosy are at large and pulling off a series of robberies. The lepers are led by “Jose”, who leads an escape from a local sanitarium where he and his fellow afflicted are being cared for. A rancher named Camerino strikes a secret alliance with the unfortunate escapees, promising a hideout plus food and a share of the loot if they commit robberies for him.   Continue reading →

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December 1, 2014 · 8:10 pm

CHRISTMAS SEASON TURKEYS FROM BALLADEER’S BLOG

ELVESRegular readers of Balladeer’s Blog are very familiar with my Bad Movie page. Laughing at bad and weird movies is one of the great joys of life so I often post holiday-themed looks at cinematic turkeys around Halloween and Thanksgiving. The Yuletide season has its fair share of turkeys as well, so enjoy this examination of more Christmas season bombs than even Henry Kissinger ever dreamed of. In keeping with my blog’s overall theme I will exclude overexposed movies like Santa Claus Conquers the Martians and the Mexican film Santa Claus. Visit my Bad Movie page if you want full-length reviews of the following flicks.  

Christmas MartianTHE CHRISTMAS MARTIAN (1971) – This Canadian flick is dubbed into English from its orginal French so viewers get treated to the Old School bad movie fun of the actor’s lip movements rarely matching the words being said. An annoyingly whimsical and whacky Martian gets stuck in Canada at Christmas time. A young brother and sister help the alien visitor repair his Ed Wood- level spaceship and save him from suspicious Canadian authorities. Yes, it all seems … reminiscent … of the much-later movie E.T. but I’m sure that’s just a coincidence. (?)

The Martian overdoes the zaniness factor to such a degree that even Charles Nelson Reilly would have told him to tone it down a little. He also wallows in a Canadian candy treat that looks a lot like Reese’s Pieces. Just sayin’. Randy and Richard on The Texas 27 Film Vault showed this in the 1980’s. 

SANTA AND THE ICE CREAM BUNNY (1972) – Ever want to see Santa Claus sweating so much that his red pants cling to his butt tightly enough for his crack and each buttock to stand out wide and proud? THIS is the movie for you! (And please stay away from children.) Santa’s sleigh crash-lands in Continue reading →

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November 27, 2014 · 3:36 pm

THANKSGIVING TURKEYS WITH THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

Randy Clower (right) with co-host Richard Malmos as "Film Vault Technicians First Class" on The Texas 27 Film Vault

Randy Clower (right) with co-host Richard Malmos as “Film Vault Technicians First Class” on The Texas 27 Film Vault. They’re way down on Level 31. No, not Deep 13 – Level 31.

Randy Clower and Richard Malmos of The Texas 27 Film Vault (both lower right) featured in a Movie Host article with Stella from Saturday Night Dead and Elvira.

Randy Clower and Richard Malmos of The Texas 27 Film Vault (both lower right) featured in a Movie Host article with Stella from Saturday Night Dead and Elvira.

The Texas 27 Film Vault was a great pre-MST3K bad movie show from the mid-1980’s. The hosts Randy Clower and Richard Malmos (also the co-creators of the program) were members of the fictional quasi-military outfit called the Film Vault Corps – “the few, the proud, the sarcastic”. Ken Miller, who played the gung-ho Kilgore-esque Tex on the show was also a co-creator. Tragically Miller commited suicide in 1988.   

The Texas 27 Film Vault aired for 2 and 1/2 hours every Saturday night from 10:30pm to 1:00 am with Randy, Richard, Tex, Joe The Hypnotic Eye Riley and Laurie Savino the Mystery Clip Technician showing and mocking episodes of old Republic and Columbia serials before showing and mocking the night’s bad or campy movie.

Texas and Oklahoma loved this cult show and it’s rare for Sooners and Longhorns to agree on anything! Here’s a look at some of the more memorable episodes from The Texas 27 Film Vault history.  

It! The terror from beyond space 2IT! THE TERROR FROM BEYOND SPACE (1958)

Original Broadcast Date: July 12th, 1986

Serial: Atom Man vs Superman (1950) 

Host Segments: Most of the Host Segments in this episode centered around a touring troupe from the Film Vault Corps Academy in Leadville, Co. That troupe – the FVC Academy’s Little Theatre Group – was performing for Randy, Richard, Tex and the others. Joe Riley’s gore effects took center stage as the touring thespians presented comedic reenactments of classic scenes from movies about aliens, including the infamous chest-burster moment from Alien and an unappetizing moment from the 80’s remake of The Thing. 

The gore in the Host Segments made this the first Texas 27 Film Vault episode to come with a “Viewer Discretion” warning. Their later presentation of the hilariously bad Friday the 13th Part 3 was another. 

Movie: It! The Terror From Beyond Space was a joyously bad black & white space travel film from the 1950s. A Martian monster has already wiped out all but one member of the first expedition to the Red Planet. Next up on the menu for this ET who sucks all moisture from his victims: the rescue expedition who belatedly arrive to save the crew of the preceding mission to Mars.   

Continue reading →

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November 26, 2014 · 10:26 pm

THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT THANKSGIVING EPISODE FROM 1985

Blood Freak (1972)

Blood Freak (1972)

In the middle 1980′s/ Way down on Level 31 …

Before MST3K there was The Texas 27 Film Vault! Balladeer’s Blog continues its examination of this neglected cult show from the 1980′s with another review of an episode where an original air date can be determined. This time around I’m taking a look at the show’s Thanksgiving episode from the Saturday night before Thanksgiving in 1985.

Randy and Richard showed and mocked Blood Freak, the notorious “Turkey Monster” movie that has been featured by virtually every Movie Host show except MST3K over the years. The Turkey Monster and the main character’s job at a turkey farm have made this a Thanksgiving Season favorite for lovers of bad movies. 

EPISODE ORIGINALLY BROADCAST: Saturday November 23rd, 1985 from 10:30pm to 1:00am.

Blood Freak2FILM VAULT LORE: Our machine-gun toting members of the fictional Film Vault Corps Randy Clower and Richard Malmos used to joke about how The Texas 27 Film Vault seemed to show every movie that had the word “blood” in the title. Previously I’ve reviewed the T27FV episodes featuring the movies Queen of Blood and Blood Beach but there are plenty more coming with sanguinous titles.

Thank you to my fellow T27FV fan Dolores for this quote about Ken Miller, who played “Tex” on the show and who, tragically, committed suicide in 1988: “I loved the random bits of madness added by the gung ho Tex each episode! He always reminded me of Robert Duvall’s character Kilgore from Apocalypse Now. My favorite catch-phrase from Tex was when he would say “Commies don’t watch bad movies!” the way Duvall said “Charley don’t surf!” in Apocalypse Now.”  

Flash Gordon Conquers the UniverseSERIAL: Before showing and mocking the movie our Film Vault Technicians First Class showed and mocked a chapter of the 1940 serial Flash Gordon Conquers The Universe. Special thanks to my fellow Vaultie Channing for her providing the date and serial for this episode.  

THE FILM: BLOOD FREAK (1972) – This movie is about a man who turns into a murderous monster with the head of a turkey after he eats a Continue reading →

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November 25, 2014 · 3:01 pm

TURKEY DAY: BAD MOVIES AND SHORTS FOR THANKSGIVING

Blood Freak (1972)

Blood Freak (1972)

For the Thanksgiving holiday Balladeer’s Blog is focusing on bad movies and hilariously lame educational shorts that have a specific Thanksgiving theme. As always my Bad Movie page contains full-length reviews of the films I’m offering a brief synopsis of here.

BLOOD FREAK (1972) – This movie is about a man who turns into a murderous monster with the head of a turkey after he eats a chemically treated gobbler at the turkey farm where he works. Blood Freak has been a cult classic for Thanksgiving for decades now, with many Movie Host shows of the late 70’s onward making a point of screening it at this time of year (including The Texas 27 Film Vault). The biker who turns into the blood-crazed turkey monster is Continue reading →

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November 19, 2014 · 12:17 am

FOUR MORE BAD MOVIES

Balladeer’s Blog takes a look at four more neglected bad movies. 

Secret of Dorian GrayTHE SECRET OF DORIAN GRAY (1970) – A terrific idea was blown in this hilariously flawed attempt to adapt Oscar Wilde’s Picture of Dorian Gray to swinging 60’s London. Helmut Berger, who was sort of a Nordic Michael York back when this movie was made stars as our title hero whose portrait begins to reflect all the physical and spiritual wear and tear of Dorian’s hedonistic lifestyle, thus preserving his young, beautiful physical form.

It also prevents Dorian’s body from aging, which has always made me think this adaptation might have worked better as a musical comedy in the 1980’s with Dorian a Mick Jagger-type rocker starting out in the 60’s but retaining his appeal two decades later. The contrast between the 60’s and 80’s cultural mindset would have provided plenty of comic and not-so-comic material. Continue reading →

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November 11, 2014 · 12:34 am

BEAUTIFUL CASEY JAMES AND BALLADEER’S BLOG’S BAD SUPERHERO MOVIES

Special thanks once again to the extraordinarily lovely Casey James, Balladeer’s Blog’s Official Movie Hostess! This time around Casey is helping present the first of my reviews of bad and weird superhero movies.

The Golden Bat: the ugliest superhero in the world.

The Golden Bat: the ugliest superhero in the world.

THE GOLDEN BAT (1966) – Ogon Batto is the name of this film in its native Japan. The movie was based on the title character, Japan’s very first comic book superhero who debuted in 1930. That 1930 date puts him years before Superman and Batman in the west!  

At any rate for the 1966 movie Japan’s perennial action star Sonny Chiba played the leader of a group of science-oriented commandos in what looked like aluminum foil suits. Chiba and his gang have fancy aircraft like England’s Thunderbirds and their debut mission finds them trying to save the Earth from collision with a rogue planet called Icarus. Continue reading →

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