THANKSGIVING TURKEYS WITH THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

The Texas 27 Film Vault was a great pre-MST3K bad movie show from the mid-1980’s. The hosts Randy Clower and Richard Malmos (also the co-creators of the program) were members of the fictional quasi-military outfit called the Film Vault Corps – “the few, the proud, the sarcastic”. Ken Miller, who played the gung-ho Kilgore-esque Tex on the show was also a co-creator. Tragically Miller commited suicide in 1988.   

The Texas 27 Film Vault aired for 2 and 1/2 hours every Saturday night from 10:30pm to 1:00 am with Randy, Richard, Tex, Joe The Hypnotic Eye Riley and Laurie Savino the Mystery Clip Technician showing and mocking episodes of old Republic and Columbia serials before showing and mocking the night’s bad or campy movie.

Texas and Oklahoma loved this cult show and it’s rare for Sooners and Longhorns to agree on anything! Here’s a look at some of the more memorable episodes from The Texas 27 Film Vault history.  

IT! THE TERROR FROM BEYOND SPACE (1958)

Original Broadcast Date: July 12th, 1986

Serial: Atom Man vs Superman (1950) 

Host Segments: Most of the Host Segments in this episode centered around a touring troupe from the Film Vault Corps Academy in Leadville, Co. That troupe – the FVC Academy’s Little Theatre Group – was performing for Randy, Richard, Tex and the others. Joe Riley’s gore effects took center stage as the touring thespians presented comedic reenactments of classic scenes from movies about aliens, including the infamous chest-burster moment from Alien and an unappetizing moment from the 80’s remake of The Thing. 

The gore in the Host Segments made this the first Texas 27 Film Vault episode to come with a “Viewer Discretion” warning. Their later presentation of the hilariously bad Friday the 13th Part 3 was another. 

Movie: It! The Terror From Beyond Space was a joyously bad black & white space travel film from the 1950s. A Martian monster has already wiped out all but one member of the first expedition to the Red Planet. Next up on the menu for this ET who sucks all moisture from his victims: the rescue expedition who belatedly arrive to save the crew of the preceding mission to Mars.   

Full-Length Review: https://glitternight.com/2013/08/29/it-the-terror-from-beyond-space-1958-on-the-texas-27-film-vault-july-12th-1986/

THE GIANT CLAW (1957)

Original Broadcast Date: April 6th, 1985

Serial: The Lost City (1935)

Host Segments: One of the Host Segments ridiculed the “black person into white person” machine used by the mad scientist in The Lost City. 

Movie: This legendary turkey features the giant, Kaiju-sized buzzard from outer space beloved by generations of bad movie buffs. The beast gobbles up parachuting pilots and attacks various landmarks including the U.N. Building. The typical Bland White Guy and Bland White Woman from films back then save the world from the rampaging beast. 

Full Length Review: https://glitternight.com/2013/06/08/the-giant-claw-1957-on-the-texas-27-film-vault-april-of-1985/ 

THE PARTY CRASHERS (1958)

Original Broadcast Date: September 13th, 1986

Serial: Mysterious Doctor Satan (1940)

Host Segments: One of the segments featured Randy and Richard’s interview with Denver Pyle, who was one of the stars of the night’s movie.

Movie: The Party Crashers is one of the most enjoyably campy Juvenile Delinquent films of the 1950s. The title gang are J.D.’s who crash parties at the homes of the wealthy, help themselves to food, booze and women then trash the place. A “good girl” is torn between her bland boyfriend and the repulsive leader of The Party Crashers. All the teens are spoiled and annoying – all the adults are alcoholics and bloated rich pigs. Lots of fun!

Full Length Review: https://glitternight.com/2014/04/16/the-party-crashers-1958-on-the-texas-27-film-vault/ 

RETURN OF THE FLY (1959)

Original Broadcast Date: August 9th, 1986

Serial: Atom Man vs Superman (1950)  

Host Segments: Randy and Richard interviewed Vincent Price in this episode. They also plugged their upcoming appearance at the premier of David Cronenberg’s remake of the original movie The Fly. At that appearance, it turned out, Randy and Richard were deluged by an enormous turnout of Texas 27 Film Vault fans.

Movie: This was the cheaper and hilariously lamer sequel to  The Fly. Vincent Price reprised his role from the original and Brett Halsey portrayed the troubled son of the original man-fly. Through an act of industrial sabotage Halsey’s character becomes part fly just like dear old dad.

FULL LENGTH REVIEW: https://glitternight.com/2013/04/25/return-of-the-fly-1959-on-the-texas-27-film-vault-august-9th-1986/

BLOOD FREAK (1972)

Original Broadcast Date: November 23rd, 1985

Serial: Flash Gordon Conquers the Universe (1940)

Host Segments: A look at the goofiest monsters in horror film history.

Movie: The ULTIMATE Thanksgiving Season turkey. Randy and Richard presented it the Saturday before Thanksgiving in 1985. This movie features a biker who gets a job on a turkey farm and, after eating fowl injected with experimental chemicals by two mad scientists he turns into a turkey monster who needs to feast on the blood of junkies to satisfy his appetite and his drug addiction.

Full Length Review: https://glitternight.com/2014/11/26/the-texas-27-film-vault-thanksgiving-episode-from-1985/

KISS MEETS THE PHANTOM OF THE PARK (1978)

Original Broadcast Date: May 16th, 1987

Serial: None. The movie plus the Host Segments filled the whole 2 and 1/2 hours.

Host Segments: A look at odd rock and roll movies.

Movie: The members of KISS take on Anthony Zerbe’s Phantom, a mad scientist who works for an amusement park. (Do Disney World and King’s Dominion also employ mad scientists?) Each member of KISS has various superpowers and they use those powers to battle Zerbe’s robot monsters which include duplicates of themselves.

Full Length Review: https://glitternight.com/2014/04/30/kiss-meets-the-phantom-of-the-park-1978-on-the-texas-27-film-vault/

HORROR OF PARTY BEACH (1964)

Original Broadcast Date: May 25th, 1985

Serial: The Phantom Empire (1935)

Host Segments: During one segment Richard stuffs his mouth with hot dogs in such a way to make himself resemble the multi-tongued monsters in the movie.  

Movie: This is one of the most famous bad movies of all time. Nearly every Movie Host show has presented it at some point. Radioactive waste causes the mutation of scaly sea monsters called “zombies” even though that’s NOT what they are. The Del Aires perform some odd but memorable songs and the monsters all have multiple tongues which look like hot dogs.

Full Length Review: https://glitternight.com/2013/05/31/bad-movie-horror-of-party-beach-1964-on-the-texas-27-film-vault-may-25th-1985/

TRUNK TO CAIRO (1966)

Original Broadcast Date: February 9th, 1985

Serial: None. The movie plus the Host Segments filled up the entire running time.

Host Segments: A look at movies featuring the James Bond wannabe’s from the 1960’s like Derek Flint, Matt Helm and so many others.

Movie: Audie Murphy stars as CIA agent Mike Merrick, a ridiculous attempt to start an American version of James Bond that fell far short even of the aforementioned Derek Flint and Matt Helm characters. Hell, Merrick’s not even Bart Fargo or Neil Connery. In this first and last Mike Merrick film the superspy tries to stop a former Nazi scientist from helping fanatical Egyptian Muslims develop high-tech missiles to use against Israel and Europe.

Full Length Review: https://glitternight.com/2013/04/04/the-first-bad-movie-shown-on-the-texas-27-film-vault/ 

QUEEN OF BLOOD (1966) 

Original Broadcast Date: May 3rd, 1986

Serial: Radar Men from the Moon (1952)

Host Segments: Randy and Richard interviewed the legendary Forrest J Ackerman, who had a small role in the episode’s movie.

Movie: Queen of Blood was one of the many cheapjack space-journey movies of the 60’s to blend new footage with stock footage from Russian films like Planet of Storms and others. Dennis Hopper, John Saxon and others starred in this film about the crew of an Earth spaceship encountering a female alien bloodsucker from outer space.   

Full Length Review: https://glitternight.com/2013/04/12/bad-movie-queen-of-blood-1966-shown-on-the-texas-27-film-vault-may-3rd-1986/

IN THE NEAR FUTURE BALLADEER’S BLOG WILL PRESENT MORE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT MILESTONES. Be here to share the Film Vault Corp’s mission of “safeguarding America’s schlock-culture heritage”.

FOR ADDITIONAL INFO ON THIS SHOW –https://glitternight.com/texas-27-film-vault/

© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.