MOCK HEADLINES: MARCH 20th

hillary-drink-in-handA DRUNK AND INCOHERENT HILLARY CLINTON PRAISES THE LATE STEPHEN HAWKING FOR FOUNDING THE X-MEN

DEMOCRATS DEMAND THAT ELECTIONS BE REPLACED BY A PANEL OF CELEBRITIES WHO DECIDE ON THE NEXT PRESIDENT

DEMOCRATS OFFER ALTERNATIVE SYSTEM IN WHICH ONLY PEOPLE WHO MAKE A MILLION DOLLARS PER YEAR OR MORE ARE ALLOWED TO VOTE

HILLARY SAYS SHE’S OPEN TO PERMITTING SOME POOR PEOPLE TO LIVE, BUT ONLY UNDER CERTAIN CONDITIONS

ISOLATED, HEAVILY POPULATED POCKETS OF BLOATED RICH PIGS AND POMPOUS SNOBS STILL INSIST THEY SHOULD RULE THE COUNTRY 

mapAMERICA’S THIRD-WORLD LEVEL CORRUPT GOVERNMENT STILL PRETENDING THAT DE FACTO THIRD PARTY PRESIDENT DONALD TRUMP IS THE CROOK, NOT THEM

HILLARY CLINTON VOWS TO KEEP REVISING HER HATRED OF THE POOR AND THE WORKING CLASS UNTIL SHE FINDS A WAY OF EXPRESSING IT THAT WORKS POLITICALLY

UNINFORMED, SHALLOW PEOPLE WHO CAN’T EVEN NAME THEIR OWN SENATOR OR HOUSE REPS STILL THINK PRESIDENT TRUMP IS THE ANTICHRIST

DEMOCRATS DEMAND THAT HOSPITALS REFUSE TREATMENT TO ANYONE SUSPECTED OF VOTING FOR PRESIDENT TRUMP; ANTIFA COWARDS SAVAGELY BEAT ANYONE WHO DISAGREES #LOVEWINS 

NATION STILL REJOICING THAT NEITHER HILLARY CLINTON NOR JEB BUSH GOT ELECTED PRESIDENT

BLOATED RICH PIGS AGREE THAT THEY HATE PRESIDENT TRUMP FOR THE SAME REASONS THEY HATED FRANKLIN DELANO ROOSEVELT

HILLARY BLAMES HER CONSTANT FALLS ON TRUMP’S INVISIBLE, NON-EXISTENT RUSSIAN COLLABORATORS

AL GORE INSISTS ATMOSPHERIC CONDITIONS DUE TO GLOBAL WARMING/ CLIMATE CHANGE/ MAGIC WEATHER IMPS ALWAYS CAUSE HILLARY CLINTON TO SOUND LIKE A HATE-FILLED, SNOBBISH DRUNK

FIRST LADY MELANIA TRUMP STILL SPEAKS MORE LANGUAGES THAN BOTH OBAMAS COMBINED

FORMER CIA SCUMBAG BRENNAN THREATENS PRESIDENT TRUMP 

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Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion

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