MOCK HEADLINES: MARCH 9th

Trump is the new FDRWelcome back to Balladeer’s Blog! Recently even Democrat Chris Matthews acknowledged that our de facto Third Party President Donald Trump is looking out for “Forgotten American workers.” Meanwhile, President Trump’s opponents keep looking out for illegal immigrants and for Corporate Fascists like Mark “Skippy” Zuckerberg.

At any rate it seemed like a good time for another round of Mock Headlines:

(By the way, I’m neither a liberal nor a conservative. Want proof? CLICK HERE )

HOLLYWOOD INSISTS LOWER RATINGS MEAN THE OSCARS/WEINSTEIN AWARDS WERE MORE SUCCESSFUL THAN EVER BEFORE! 

MAN EMERGES FROM DEEP COMA; REMEMBERS HE IS ATTORNEY GENERAL OF THE UNITED STATES

JERRY BROWN: “THE DEAD VICTIMS OF ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT CRIMES HAVE NOT ISSUED ONE WORD OF COMPLAINT ABOUT THE OAKLAND MAYOR HELPING MURDERERS AND RAPISTS ESCAPE ARREST BY WARNING THEM ABOUT I.C.E. RAIDS”

BLOATED RICH PIG CELEBRITIES CONTINUE TO MISTAKENLY THINK THEY SPEAK FOR THE WORKING CLASS AND THE POOR

mascot new look donkey and elephant headsMEDIA FINALLY ADMITS “PRESIDENTIAL APPROVAL RATINGS” ARE A MEANINGLESS FARCE AS INACCURATE AS HOROSCOPES

DEMOCRAT DICK DURBIN AT A LOSS TO EXPLAIN JENNIFER LAWRENCE’S RECENT HATE-FILLED DIATRIBE AGAINST HIM

ADMITTED RAPIST KOBE BRYANT WINS AN OSCAR/WEINSTEIN AWARD AMID #METOO PREENING CEREMONIES

PRESIDENT TRUMP STILL HATED BY EVERY ENEMY OF THE WORKING CLASS AND THE POOR

REASONABLE PEOPLE AGREE: WATCHING ANY AWARDS SHOW IS EVEN WORSE THAN GOING TO CHURCH

AWARDS SHOWS TO BE RE-LABELED “SHOW TRIALS IN WHICH THE VIEWERS ARE ASSUMED GUILTY OF EVERYTHING THE HOSTS HAVE DONE AND ARE TO BE LECTURED BY RICH PIG DEMOCRATS” 

BROWARD COUNTY OFFICIALLY CHANGES NAME TO COWARD COUNTY 

CNN SAYS “IT’S ONLY CRAZY WHEN REPUBLICAN CANDIDATES TALK TO GOD, NOT WHEN OPRAH DOES IT”

PARKLAND: ONLY DEMOCRATS MAY EXPLOIT OUR KIDS, NOT THOSE ICKY REPUBLICANS

DEMOCRATS INSIST ONLY ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS HAVE RIGHTS, NEVER THEIR VICTIMS 

© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog, 2018. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

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2 Comments

Filed under LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, Neglected History, opinion

2 responses to “MOCK HEADLINES: MARCH 9th

  1. Are you sure those aren’t REAL headlines?

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