Category Archives: Bad and weird movies

April 30, 2014 · 10:22 pm

KISS MEETS THE PHANTOM OF THE PARK (1978) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

KISS Meets the Phantom of the ParkIn the middle 1980′s/ Way down on Level 31 –

Randy Clower and Richard Malmos of The Texas 27 Film Vault (both lower right) featured in a Movie Host article with Stella from Saturday Night Dead and Elvira.

Randy Clower and Richard Malmos of The Texas 27 Film Vault (both lower right) featured in a Movie Host article with Stella from Saturday Night Dead and Elvira.

Before MST3K there was … The Texas 27 Film Vault!

Balladeer’s Blog continues its examination of this neglected cult show from the mid-1980′s.

EPISODE ORIGINALLY BROADCAST: Saturday May ??, 1987 from 10:30pm to 1:00 am. Exact date is still being debated. Any Vaulties with further information please feel free to contact me.

EXTRAS: Every single nanosecond of this film is riff-worthy, so with the usual comedy sketches from the Film Vault Corps (“the few, the proud, the sarcastic”) added on plus commercials there was no time for an episode of a Republic or Columbia serial before the movie this time. Randy and Richard, our machine-gun toting Film Vault Technicians First Class were able to get to the movie quickly.  Continue reading →

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April 16, 2014 · 8:08 pm

THE PARTY CRASHERS (1958) – ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

Mysterious Doctor SatanIn the middle 1980’s/ Way down on Level 31 –

Before MST3K there was … The Texas 27 Film Vault!

Balladeer’s Blog continues its examination of this neglected cult show from the mid-1980′s.

EPISODE ORIGINALLY BROADCAST: Saturday September 13th, 1986 from 10:30pm to 1:00am.

Randy (right) and Richard way down on Level 31 hosting The Texas 27 Film Vault

Randy (right) and Richard way down on Level 31 hosting The Texas 27 Film Vault

EXTRAS: This episode featured Randy and Richard’s interview with Denver Pyle, who appears in the film being riffed on, The Party Crashers. They taped the interview with him at Ben Johnson’s ranch earlier in the year. The interview would be rerun when The Texas 27 Film Vault showed The Flying Saucer, another film with Denver Pyle in a supporting role. OR as some T27FV fans have claimed The Flying Saucer was shown by Randy and Richard during the summer of 1986 so the Denver Pyle interview was being run for the second time in TONIGHT’S episode. When or if I can confirm or nail down the specifics I will adjust this entry.

SERIAL: Before presenting and mocking The Party Crashers our machine-gun wielding Film Vault Technicians First Class presented and mocked an episode of Mysterious Doctor Satan, a Republic serial from 1940. The serial featured a mad scientist called Dr Satan trying to take over the world with a VERY goofy- looking robot while a pulp-style hero called the Copperhead tried to thwart his plans.     Continue reading →

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March 26, 2014 · 10:54 pm

BAD MOVIE: THE MAN FROM S.E.X. (1979)

man from sexTHE MAN FROM S.E.X. (1979) – Category: Fun-bad but not classically bad enough for my highest rating.

Bind … Charles Bind. In the cinematic world of cheapjack James Bond ripoffs the three films that featured Lindsay Shonteff’s secret agent Charles Bind aka “Number One” are possibly THE worst. “The Bind Trilogy” deserves to be as well-known to fans of bad movies as flicks like Operation Double 007, Danger! Death Ray and Trunk to Cairo. All three of Number One’s movies are Number Two (had to be said) but The Man From S.E.X. pretty much Harry Alan Towers (rimshot) over the other two in terms of awfulness.

Nicky Hensen portrayed Bind … well, given Hensen’s limited thespian skills let’s instead say “he was billed as Bind in the credits” of the first Charles Bind/ Number One film, titled Number One of the Secret Service (1970). (Jon “Dr Who” Pertwee was in the Hensen film, too)  

Gareth Hunt (of New Avengers fame) was billed as Bind in the credits of this middle film in the series and in 1990 came the third and final film Number One Gun, starring Michael Howe (of Tom Grattan’s War fame). The first and third pitted our hero against the evil organization K.R.A.S.H. (Killing, Rape, Arson, Slaughter and Hits) but The Man From S.E.X. featured a different – but no less absurd – villain.

Continue reading →

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March 14, 2014 · 4:00 pm

ADAM AND EVE VERSUS THE CANNIBALS (1983)

Adam and Eve vs the CannibalsScrew the overrated Dan Brown and what he thinks are “shocking” revelations even though they’ve been known about and debated for centuries. If you want to see what the world’s religious establishments have REALLY been hiding from you check out this delirious acid trip of a movie from Italy. For the squeamish I know the word “cannibals” in close proximity to “Italy” usually means the hardcore violence of Italian Cannibal flicks by Ruggerio Deodato and company but that’s not the case here.

Actually this movie seems to have been trying to leapfrog on the mild success of films like Quest for Fire or One Million B.C. with odd overtones of Blue Lagoon but the end result is UN-intentionally funnier than Ringo Starr’s comedy Caveman. Adam and Eve versus the Cannibals opens up with a montage of “creation” followed by a scene of Adam (cult action icon Mark Gregory) emerging from a bloody and gooey cocoon … yes, a cocoon.

Not too long after that this flick throws even more oddball theology at us as it Continue reading →

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March 10, 2014 · 6:01 pm

THE EIGHT MOST NEGLECTED BAD MOVIES HERE AT BALLADEER’S BLOG

Alabama's GhostSome of the bad and weird movies I review here at Balladeer’s Blog get a huge amount of love. Films like Death Bed, Deafula, Assignment: Terror, Ghost Busting, Lewd Lizard and plenty of others don’t go a day without plenty of hits. Others for whatever reason struggle for attention. Here is a look at some of those flicks that deserve just as much of a cult following as the big names have.

ALABAMA’S GHOST (1973) – Who does this movie have to sleep with to get into my top ten articles per day on a regular basis? This flick boasts Nazi vampires from outer space, a female mad scientist named Dr Caligula, campy voice-over narration and an incoherent, cobbled-together ending prompted by the film’s production budget running out. And did I mention the Continue reading →

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March 4, 2014 · 4:10 pm

MARDI GRAS MASSACRE (1978)

Mardi Gras MassacreMARDI GRAS MASSACRE (1978) – Category: A neglected Bad Movie classic, but its hard-core gore will prevent it from ever having a Plan 9-sized cult following

It takes a twisted sort of genius to make multiple disembowelment murders look boring, but that’s exactly what Jack Weis accomplishes in Mardi Gras Massacre! Today may be Fat Tuesday, but let’s rechristen it “Splat Tuesday” in honor of this late 70’s splatterfest. 

The actual “massacre” part of this movie is an incredible disappointment. An insane, hate-filled man with a Continue reading →

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February 4, 2014 · 12:03 am

SEXY CASEY JAMES AND BALLADEER’S BLOG’S BAD MOVIE ARCHIVES

Casey archive1Thank you once again to Balladeer’s Blog’s Official Movie Hostess, Casey James! It’s no secret that Casey is one of the most desired women on the planet but she was kind enough to take a break from stealing the hearts of her countless admirers to help present another look at bad and weird movies.  

THE SECRET OF DORIAN GRAY (1970) – A terrific idea was blown in this hilariously flawed attempt to adapt Oscar Wilde’s Picture of Dorian Gray to swinging 60’s London. Helmut Berger, who was sort of a Continue reading →

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January 21, 2014 · 9:30 pm

BAD MOVIE: OVERLORDS OF THE UFO (1977)

Overlords of the UFOA reader sent me an email requesting that I review this movie but I already did in 2010.

Here it is again along with a reminder to check my Bad Movie Page to get immediate satisfaction for your bad movie fix.

After all, I might have already reviewed the movie you are requesting in which case you could read the review by simply clicking right here – https://glitternight.com/bad-movies 

OVERLORDS OF THE UFO (1977) – Category: Hilariously lame “documentary” about conspiracies, the paranormal and/or the supernatural    This little honey comes from the muck and slime encrusted bottom of the cinematic barrel of movies that followed in the wake of the ridiculous Chariots Of The Gods. None of these schlockumentaries are very convincing about their subject matter but this flick is so outrageously inept that not even the Ancient Aliens team would be suckered in by it … maybe.

Early on the fun kicks into high gear with mismatched stock footage of Continue reading →

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January 8, 2014 · 12:01 am

CHANGE OF HABIT (1969) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

Change of Habit bBefore MST3K there was … The Texas 27 Film Vault!

EPISODE ORIGINALLY BROADCAST: Saturday January 10th, 1987 from 10:30pm to 1:00am.

EXTRAS: Special thanks to T27FV fan Dr Shock-the-Monkey for the date and other info about this episode. He stated this episode also featured appearances by various Elvis impersonators but he wasn’t sure if they were legit or put-ons since they were all of the “bloated stomach and very weird hair” type of Elvis look-a-likes. 

Elvis on BerleSERIAL : Due to the length of the movie this time there was not enough time before the film for Randy Clower and Richard Malmos, the machine-gun toting Film Vault Technicians First Class to show and mock a full episode of one of their pre-movie serials. Instead they showed the excerpt of Elvis Presley’s April 3rd, 1956 appearance on The Milton Berle Show before moving on to the night’s film.

THE MOVIE: Change of Habit is a movie that was practically MADE to be ridiculed. You’ve got Continue reading →

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December 31, 2013 · 4:44 pm

NEW YEAR’S EVE BAD MOVIES FROM BALLADEER’S BLOG

Here at Balladeer’s Blog I’m very fond of cinematic turkeys that have seasonal tie-ins. Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas bombs have gotten ample attention from me, so permit me to follow those items up with this look at bad movies with a New Year’s Eve theme. As usual, full-length reviews of these films can be found on my Bad Movie page.

AKA Time Warp

AKA Time Warp

BLOODY NEW YEAR (1987) – Also released under the title Time Warp but it’s grisly enough for the more explicit title. A handful of British boaters who are fleeing a family of soccer hooligans (no, really) wind up on an island with a deserted hotel that’s been decorated for a New Year’s Eve party since the 1950’s. This Norman J Warren film stars nobody and borrows heavily from Sam Raimi’s original Evil Dead in terms of its imitation “Deadites” and its POV tracking shots. It also features a killer who emerges from a movie being watched, a monster who climbs out of a tablecloth, homicidal kitchen utensils, indoor snowfall, laughing shrubbery and living walls. All the chaos is being caused by hapless souls who have been trapped in limbo for decades and will do anything to get out or to drag others into their hellish undead existence with them.

Bloody New Year is a neglected bad movie classic that has all the Continue reading →

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