PROS AND CONS OF DONALD “AGENT ORANGE” TRUMP’S ELECTION

Once Donald Trump is sworn in as president I will naturally switch to criticizing him the way ALL U.S. presidents should be criticized. In the meantime here are some light-hearted thoughts on the pros and cons of Trump’s election.

PRO: TRUMP IS A DE FACTO THIRD PARTY PRESIDENT -Trump’s campaign benefited from the widespread disgust with the Democrats and Republicans (DemCorp and RepubCorp). He basically hijacked the Republican Party and used it as a vehicle to reach the Oval Office. Besides, the fact that pieces of garbage like the Bush Family and the white male Conservatives at National Review hate Trump so badly is A GOOD SIGN.

CON: THE REPUBLICAN PARTY GOT SOME UNDESERVED BENEFITS FROM TRUMP’S POPULARITY – The bad news is that the Republicans held on to both the Senate and the House AND picked up some additional governorships. RepubCorp does NOT deserve such fringe benefits from Trump’s election. 

After all, Prince Donald of Orange was the ONLY one of them reaching out to the working class and the poor. Trump also DOUBLED the GOP’s usual take of the African-American vote, outdid the somnambulist Romney with Hispanic-Americans and SET A RECORD for INDIVIDUAL DONATIONS to the GOP. As in contributions from PEOPLE, not bloated rich pigs like the ones financing career criminal Hillary “Bugsy” Clinton.  

PRO: Trump’s election has inspired the insane American Left to drive away even more people from their 1960s worldview.

CON: Trump’s election has inspired the insane American Right to ignore the lessons that his candidacy should have taught them about the need to woo working class voters of all colors.

PRO: To quote Democrat Al Franken “No English-speaking person could do a worse job than” Barack Obama.

CON: Obama keeps claiming Americans approve of the job he did by foolishly citing the same polls that claimed Hillary would be the next president as “proof.”

PRO: Trump’s election was part of the growing global surge of populism which features voters demanding accountability from the figures they elect.

CON: America’s Democratic and Republican Parties have proven they STILL plan to stand athwart their own constituents crying “halt!”

PRO: The fact that so many bloated rich pigs like Mark Zuckerberg,  George Soros, Carlos Slim, the Koch Brothers and Mark “Still Bitter That Trump Didn’t Make Him His V.P.” Cuban oppose Trump is a good sign. 

CON: The bloated rich pigs who oppose Trump will use every media outlet they own to attack him and distort every aspect of his policies and performance as president.

PRO: Queen Elizabeth has already announced she will invite the Trumps for a state visit.

CON: Queen Elizabeth has already announced she will invite the Trumps for a state visit.

PRO: It may reduce the ugly random shootings of cops that Barack “The Black Eddie Haskell” Obama kept cheering on and encouraging.

CON: The Klansmen of Color in BLM may urge an increase in cop shootings because of their temper tantrum over Trump’s election.

PRO: The religious right is already angry at Trump for being okay with gay marriage.

CON: Trump’s obsession with boosting the NRA – one of the richest organizations to ever buy a politician’s vote – is troubling.