Category Archives: LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES

January 18, 2013 · 12:02 am

LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES AND HYSTERIA

Two presidents who exploited national tragedies to justify eroding fundamental freedoms.

Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, the only site on the web that genuinely criticizes both Liberals and Conservatives equally. As always I’m coming to you from an America whose government was hijacked long ago by those rival gangs of white collar criminals called the Democratic and Republican Parties. Neither of those organizations are mentioned in the Constitution but you can’t realistically run for dogcatcher in this country without having to deal with the party apparatus of one of those groups because of the stranglehold they have on our electoral system. 

Both Liberals and Conservatives love to exploit public hysteria to enact policies that are grotesque violations of our constitutional rights and that they could never get away with without the panic that results in people embracing the loss of liberty. 

The Conservatives did this after Muslim terrorists committed the 9-11 attacks. In the hysteria that followed those flukish events the public practically DEMANDED that the Bush administration strip away some of our fundamental freedoms and usher in many policies of a police state. Conspiracy kooks drastically overstated the harm done which unfortunately helped make all legitimate dissent seem lacking in credibility.

Similar hysteria has Continue reading →

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December 16, 2012 · 2:08 pm

CHRISTMAS SEASON ADVICE FOR AMERICAN LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES

Ghost of Christmas PresentWelcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, the only site on the web that equally criticizes those childish fanatics called Liberals and Conservatives. Here’s some Yuletide advice for those two groups of zealots who continue to tear the country apart by putting their respective political parties ahead of the nation.

ADVICE FOR LIBERALS – Pretend these Conservatives you irrationally hate Continue reading →

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December 5, 2012 · 9:45 pm

WHY AMERICAN LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES ARE EQUALLY ANNOYING

"First George W Bush and now ME! You people will reelect ANYBODY!"

“First George W Bush and now ME! You people will reelect ANYBODY!”

Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, the only site on the web that is truly nonpartisan in its criticism of the walking caricatures called Liberals and Conservatives.

Like other adults here in the U.S. my own views are a mix of “liberal” and “conservative” attitudes. That’s why the rest of us find Liberals and Conservatives (with capitalized L’s and C’s) to be so outdated and laughably partisan. Enough preamble, here’s a list of some of the reasons we despise American Liberals and American Conservatives equally:

1. Liberals think they’re fit to lecture the rest of us about “diversity”. / Conservatives think they’re fit to lecture the rest of us about “family values”. 

2. Liberals are pretentious fools who actually think they’re the country’s official “intellectuals”.  / Conservatives are nationalist fools who actually think they’re the country’s official “patriots”. 

3. Liberals mindlessly take sides against their own country no matter what the circumstances. / Conservatives mindlessly side with their own country no matter what the circumstances.

4. Liberals actually believe Continue reading →

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November 11, 2012 · 1:01 am

HAPPY VETERANS DAY 2012

Well, it’s been nearly 100 years since November 11th, 1918 saw the end of World War One, or the Great War as it was called before anyone knew a second global conflict would occur. As we all know the date eventually became designated as the day for honoring the people who make it possible for the rest of us to lead our lives in relative safety. The following is what I posted in 2010 on Veteran’s Day and I don’t think I can say it any better.  

The irrational partisans called Liberals and Conservatives often forget that the only reason any of them have the luxury of sitting back and making pompous, self-righteous pronouncements is because of the men and women who go out and actually DO something. 

And those Continue reading →

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November 8, 2012 · 10:24 pm

LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES AND OVERREACTING TO ELECTION RESULTS

Two fools who prove that ANYBODY can get reelected and it doesn’t prove they are competent.

Welcome back to the favorite site of Independent Voters, Balladeer’s Blog, the only site on the web that criticizes Liberal fanatics and Conservative fanatics equally. The 2012 election is finally over and the Democratic candidate who belongs to billionaires defeated the Republican candidate who belongs to billionaires.

Part of the fun involved in the week following any election is laughing at the ENORMOUS overreaction of Liberals and Conservatives to the outcome. The winning side will claim a “mandate”, no matter how slender their lead in the popular vote, and this year it was only a few million votes. Not the least bit impressive in a country this size, is it? Especially not for a president who LOST millions of votes from 2008. The losing side will wail and gnash their teeth and pretend the outcome proves that the voters are “stupid” (pretentious Liberal asses) or “Communist” (nationalist Conservative asses).

As an Independent Voter here in the United States you get to see this all the time. In 2004 when the detestable George W Bush was reelected American Conservatives were pretending it meant he “was a great president” and that he’d been “vindicated by history.” It meant no such thing of course and the fact that little Barry “The Destroyer of The Economy” Obama got reelected also does not mean he’s been Continue reading →

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November 6, 2012 · 12:17 am

LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES AND “THE CANDIDATE” (1973)

The Candidate

The Candidate

Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, the favorite site of Independent Voters and the only site on the web that truly criticizes both sides of the political spectrum equally. Well, it’s finally election day, which means the Liberal and Conservative fanatics of the Democratic and Republican parties are preparing their accusations of voter fraud and/or “intimidation” just in case their candidates lose. 

Will the weak, inept and crooked little man named Barack Obama get reelected or will the outdated, out of touch religious nut named Mitt Romney win out? Either way we the people lose.

For a light-hearted look at how Liberal gibberish and Conservative gibberish have completely ossified political discourse in this country I figured I would trot out the 1972 Robert Redford film The Candidate. That film was a look at a fictional candidate for one of Continue reading →

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November 2, 2012 · 11:44 pm

THE TOP DEITIES IN AMERICAN LIBERAL MYTHOLOGY

Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, the only site on the web that equally criticizes Liberals and Conservatives. This post will be a hybrid of my mythology posts and my pokes at American political zealots. My list of Conservative deities will be coming next. In the meantime enjoy this irreverent look at the icons adored by the hilariously pretentious asses of American Liberalism. Naturally part of the fun comes from the fact that pompous Liberals always like to criticize figures that other people revere but fall to pieces and froth at the mouth with impotent outrage whenever figures THEY hold dear are regarded with the same critical eye. 

Not pictured – a Liberal

9. JOHN F KENNEDY  – Despite what 21st Century American Liberals think John F Kennedy was not a Liberal. His brother Ted certainly was, but JFK, as revealed in books like Conversations With Kennedy, regarded Liberals as hopelessly impractical and humored them only to the degree that he had to to ensure enough party cooperation when dealing with Congress. Even Tip O’Neil, in his autobiography Man of the House maintained that Jack Kennedy was Continue reading →

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October 24, 2012 · 9:27 pm

IF BARACK OBAMA HANDLED PEARL HARBOR

“Yeah, our Ambassador and others are dead, whatever. I’ve got a fundraiser in Las Vegas to get to! Just blame it on that Youtube video and see how that plays out.”

Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, the only Independent Voter site on the web that criticizes both Liberals and Conservatives equally. Even for a sleazy Chicago politician Barack Obama has been caught in an unending avalanche of lies from his campaign biography back in 2008 to all the outrageous untruths that have characterized his entire term in office. Last night even his usual shoeshine boy David Letterman pointed out what a liar Obama is and Jay Leno pointed out how Obama has crippled the American economy.

The weak, inept and crooked little man named Barack Obama has told lie after lie after lie about the Benghazi affair, and this, along with his general “masochism as foreign policy” approach made me decide to run with a Balladeer’s Blog look at how this Democratic version of Richard Nixon might have handled the Japanese attack on Pearl Harbor on December 7th, 1941. 

(For starters Obama would have been too busy with fundraisers and tentative spin doctoring to even address the nation until sometime around January 24th, 1942. And that’s being optimistic since he still refuses to face the press – even the pro-Obama press – over his lies about Benghazi)

My fellow Americans, I speak to you today as a special guest on the Fibber McGee and Molly radio show. I am addressing you this evening about the Continue reading →

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October 10, 2012 · 12:02 am

LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES AND PUNDITS

Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, the only Independent Voter site on the web that bashes Liberals and Conservatives equally. Only the most fanatical Liberals and Conservatives are still denying that every single news outlet is completely biased, either in favor of the left or the right. The political prejudices of every single “news” source are blatantly obvious and are as much fun to laugh at as bad movies are. REMEMBER: EVERY SINGLE NEWS SOURCE HERE IN THE U.S. IS JUST A LIBERAL PROPAGANDA OUTLET OR A CONSERVATIVE PROPAGANDA OUTLET. Here are four of the most laughable examples of American political pundits, two from each end of the political spectrum.

michael medved

Want to beat Michael Dukakis? Medved’s got the answers!

4. MICHAEL MEDVED – I think it was in Bedtime for Bonzo that Ronald Reagan expressed the Commandment he is best known for: “No bad movie lover shalt attack another bad movie lover.” But since I always felt as much contempt for Reagan as I feel for Barack Obama I’ll just break that commandment.

Michael Medved was coauthor of the two Golden Turkey Awards booklets and of The Hollywood Hall of Shame plus other landmark books for bad movie lovers. Medved even addressed Manos, The Hands of Fate years before it became a cult item in 1993. He was also one of the 1960’s Liberals who (rightly) grew disgusted with his generation’s irrational way of clinging to their increasingly outdated worldview and tiresome racebaiting.

Unfortunately, Medved went too far and became an actual conservative. His radio show is a bastion of hilarious right-wing gibberish and Continue reading →

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October 3, 2012 · 9:32 pm

MOCK DEFINITIONS OF LIBERAL AND CONSERVATIVE TERMS

“If I get reelected I want YOUR take-home pay to be reduced so drastically that you have trouble making ends meet while my cronies and I remain rich from plundering the public treasury! Sucks to be YOU losers!”

Welcome back to the favorite site of Independent Voters, Balladeer’s Blog, as always coming to you from an America where every single news outlet slants its coverage in order to pander to either Liberals or Conservatives. Tonight is this year’s first presidential debate between the usual partisan fools the Democratic and Republican Parties always inflict on the voters. Needless to say, both of them are rich and are children of privilege who have nothing in common with the rest of us. 

As a public service to the rest of us Balladeer’s Blog presents a handy guide to the political terms most frequently used by Liberal fanatics and Conservative fanatics and what those terms REALLY mean. Here they are, in no particular order: 

BARACK OBAMA – An Continue reading →

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