*** HEADLINES ***
KNOCKING OFF NUMBER SEVEN – Yesterday the unranked MICHIGAN TECH HUSKIES welcomed the number 7 team in the nation – the ASHLAND UNIVERSITY EAGLES. The Huskies defied all the prognosticators and made believers out of everyone by toppling the stunned Eagles in a 27-24 game for the ages!
HANGING NINETY – The 6th ranked GRAND VIEW UNIVERSITY VIKINGS traveled to face the CULVER-STOCKTON COLLEGE WILDCATS. The Vikings – apparently sharing Balladeer’s Blog’s weariness with teams called Wildcats, Eagles, Tigers and Bulldogs – proceeded to fold, spindle and mutilate their opponents. In the end Grand View University emerged with a NINETY to NOTHING win. Continue reading
NUMBER THREE TAKES A FALL – The 6th ranked SADDLEBACK COLLEGE GAUCHOS welcomed the number 3 FULLERTON COLLEGE HORNETS for a Battle Royal. The Gauchos trailed the Hornets 14-6 in the 1st Quarter and 21-17 by Halftime. The 3rd Quarter ended with Fullerton College clinging to a 24-23 edge but Saddleback College managed a 4th Quarter comeback for a 30-27 victory. 
EIGHT AND O – The top 2 teams in the rankings are a perfect 8-0 now. The number 1 team in the nation – the GARDEN CITY COLLEGE BRONCBUSTERS – thrashed their hosts the 12th ranked DODGE CITY COLLEGE CONQUISTADORS 36-7 ### And the number 2 ARIZONA WESTERN COLLEGE MATADORS won a 21-9 road game against the unranked PIMA COLLEGE AZTECS. 
DAVENPORT CONQUERS THE WORLD – As usual an NAIA team toppled a team from a higher division in yesterday’s action. The NAIA’s DAVENPORT UNIVERSITY PANTHERS squared off against the visiting QUINCY UNIVERSITY HAWKS from NCAA Division TWO. This was a true game for the ages, with the Panthers squeezing out a 14-10 upset. 
THAT WAS NUMBER FIIIIIIVE! – The unranked WEST TEXAS A&M BUFFALOES welcomed the number 5 team in the nation – the MIDWESTERN STATE MUSTANGS. For 4 bruising Quarters these two teams went blow for blow but there could only be one winner. That winner turned out to be the Buffaloes, who dragged down the Mustangs by a score of 35-27. 
TAKING DOWN NUMBER TWO – The unranked GOLDEN WEST COLLEGE RUSTLERS engaged in a gridiron grudge match with the visiting 2nd ranked SADDLEBACK COLLEGE GAUCHOS. After a scoreless 1st Quarter the Rustlers managed a 7-0 edge by Halftime. From there Golden West College clung to a 14-10 lead over the Gauchos to end the 3rd Quarter and held their opponents off for a 20-17 upset win. 
NUMBER FIVE WENT DOWN, TOO – The number 13 MOUNT SAN ANTONIO COLLEGE MOUNTIES hosted the 5th ranked LONG BEACH COLLEGE VIKINGS (should be the Beachcombers). The storied Mounties seized a 6-0 1st Quarter lead then expanded that into a 20-3 advantage by the midpoint. After the break Mount SAC stayed in control, improving to 4-2 with a 34-3 triumph. 
NUMBER ONE GETS DETHRONED – The 4th ranked EAST MISSISSIPPI COLLEGE LIONS welcomed the number 1 team in the nation – the NORTHWEST MISSISSIPPI COLLEGE RANGERS. The Lions seized a 7-0 edge in the opening Quarter and built that into a 24-17 advantage at Halftime. After a tight 3rd Quarter East Mississippi College exploded for 20 points in the 4th, winning the game 51-32.
THE ALL-NAME GAME OF THE WEEK – The SCOTTSDALE COLLEGE FIGHTING ARTICHOKES (yes, really) traveled to face the EASTERN ARIZONA COLLEGE GILA MONSTERS. The Fighting Artichokes managed a 12-8 1st Quarter lead and then took charge from there. At the break they led the Gila Monsters 19-8 on their way to a FIFTY-TWO to TWENTY evisceration of their opponents. 
NAIA OVER NCAA – The lone NAIA vs NCAA battle this week saw the NAIA’s PRESENTATION COLLEGE SAINTS welcome the FINLANDIA UNIVERSITY LIONS out of the NCAA. The Saints showed the Lions how football is played, eviscerating them by a score of SEVENTY-FOUR to NOTHING! So far in 2016 the NAIA has won three weeks, the NCAA has won one week and two weeks have been a tie. 
USCAA GAME OF THE WEEK – Meanwhile in the USCAA (United States Collegiate Athletic Association) the WILLIAMSON COLLEGE OF THE TRADES MECHANICS took the field against the visiting GATTACA (NJ) COLLEGE STRAYERS. The Mechanics dominated in the game, doubling up on Gattaca College 28-14. 
MONARCHS ARE SIX AND OH – The 17th ranked LOS ANGELES VALLEY COLLEGE MONARCHS remained unbeaten following their defeat of the homestanding MOUNT SAN JACINTO COLLEGE EAGLES. The Monarchs seized a 20-0 lead in the 1st Quarter and didn’t let up from there, ultimately clobbering the Eagles by a final score of FIFTY-FIVE to FOURTEEN! 
DAWN FOR THE DONS – At the other extreme the SANTA ANA COLLEGE DONS finally got off the schneid for 2016. The Dons were on the road against the LOS ANGELES SOUTHWEST COLLEGE COUGARS and parlayed a 14-7 1st Quarter edge into a 38-14 Halftime advantage. Santa Ana College coasted from there for a 52-22 blowout win. 
NUMBER THREE GETS TAKEN DOWN – The 6th seeded MORNINGSIDE COLLEGE MUSTANGS welcomed the Number 3 team in the nation – the DOANE COLLEGE TIGERS. The Mustangs are still boiling from their undeserved drop in the rankings a few weeks ago and took their anger out on the Tigers in a SIXTY-NINE to SEVEN blowout. 
NUMBER EIGHT FALLS AT HOME – The Number 18 HARDING UNIVERSITY BISON traveled to take on the 8th ranked HENDERSON STATE REDDIES yesterday. To the shock of the entire country the Bison proceeded to dismember the Reddies on their own field, manhandling them to the tune of 35-3. 
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