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HELLROLLER (1992) – Category: Enyoyably bad movie but not fun-bad enough to earn my highest rating
Hellroller is the infamous bad movie about a slasher who is confined to a wheelchair and uses it to get around as he slices and dices his victims. Ron Litman stars, if “stars” isn’t too strong a word, as Eugene, our twitchy, slobbering paraplegic. Eugene is the product of a rape perpetrated on a crack prostitute by Siamese twin rednecks (Now there’s a reality show just waiting to happen) .
When his presumed Aunt (Cult figure Mary Woronov) confesses to really being his mother and recounts the circumstances of his conception Eugene snaps and goes on a killing spree against “the normals”, meaning everyone who can walk, is supposedly “beautiful” and isn’t living on Skid Row.
In addition to slashing, impaling, disemboweling and mouth- stabbing various attractive women, usually while they’re naked, our Hellroller also literally “irons” one to death in the movie’s most famous killing.
Fueled by hatred and resentment, Eugene even goes to a mad scientist (and we all know having a mad scientist in a flick always helps in my view) who comes up with a formula that will destroy the successful and the attractive. Eugene spikes the city’s bottled water supply with the chemical and soon celebrities and bloated rich pigs are reduced to living like Eugene and his poverty-stricken acquaintances, giving our slasher Karmic justice and more convenient victims all in one go.
As for how the chemical formula causes its imbibers to become so listless and moronic, well, sadly, we don’t get an epic length junk science explanation out of the mad scientist like the one we get in The Yesterday Machine.
Even sadder is the fact that this movie doesn’t really live up to its reputation among us Bad Movie geeks. The reason is that too many scenes slow the film waaaaay down by spending too much time showing the female victims showing off their bodies before they fall victim to our crazed killer.
In the 70s low- budget filmmakers could get away with such filler but watching Hellroller in the 90s and later makes you bored with those scenes because much more explicit material is always just a few clicks away for anyone in the mood for it. It makes you flash- forward through this film as often as you find youself fast-forwarding through the “living dummy on willing woman” sex scenes in the original Black Devil Doll From Hell.
That aside, this flick has all the things Bad Movie fans live for, like amateurish gore effects, horrible acting, inane dialogue and poorly matched shots that make you realize some of the characters weren’t even on the same set for the scenes they supposedly “share”. And there’s also that kickass premise.
Throw in cult figure Johnny Legend as well and you find yourself wishing Hellroller was more tightly edited. It could have been a Bad Movie Classic instead of being just so-so.
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