The Secret of the Bermuda Triangle Revealed

The Secret of the Bermuda Triangle Revealed

Before MST3K there was … The Texas 27 Film Vault!

Balladeer’s Blog continues its examination of this neglected cult show from the mid-1980’s. Thanks to my research through VERY old newspapers, interviews with Randy Clower and emails from fellow fans of T27FV here is the ninth in a series where original broadcast dates of episodes can be determined.

Episode originally aired: Saturday April 6th, 1985 from 10:30pm to 1:00am. 

Serial: Before the movie our machine-gun toting “Film Vault Technicians First Class” Randy Clower and Richard Malmos showed an episode of The Lost City, the legendarily campy and bizarre sci-fi serial from 1935.

Film Vault Lore: Thank you to my fellow T27FV fan Dolores for this episode’s date, the serial and for this quote about Ken Miller, who played “Tex” on the show: “I loved the random bits of madness added by the gung ho Tex each episode! He always reminded me of Robert Duvall’s character Kilgore from Apocalypse Now. My favorite catch-phrase from Tex was when he would say “Commies don’t watch bad movies!” the way Duvall said “Charley don’t surf!” in Apocalypse Now.”  

The Movie: The Giant Claw is another of those staples of bad movie shows. It’s been presented by just about every Movie Host program at one time or another. Because of the film’s familiarity I will keep this review short.

"I want the NBC Peacock!"

“I want the NBC Peacock!”

Global UFO sightings turn out to be sightings of a gigantic (and ridiculous-looking) flying buzzard from outer space. As if that isn’t silly enough the destructive creature is also an ANTI-MATTER gigantic flying buzzard from outer space. We’ll just ignore the fact that NOTHING made of anti-matter could exist in a universe of matter without instant annihilation.

Eventually the movie’s Bland White Hero comes up with a way of destroying the interstellar menace and wins the love of the movie’s Bland White Woman, but that goes without saying for a 1950’s schlocker. The real fun in this flick comes from the hilariously absurd shots of the giant buzzard chowing down on parachuting fighter pilots after destroying their aircraft, the giant buzzard attacking the U.N. building and other landmarks in a sort of “Western Kaiju” series of scenes and … well, absurd shots of the giant buzzard doing ANYTHING.

Randy (right) and Richard way down on Level 31 hosting The Texas 27 Film Vault

Randy (right) and Richard way down on Level 31 hosting The Texas 27 Film Vault

The poor actors in this mega-turkey seem oblivious to how laughable the special effects shots of the anti-matter buzzard were going to be. They give it their level best to make the creature sound truly terrifying and soul-scarring, but soon we get more shots of that ludicrous buzzard and the players all wind up looking even sillier.

For fans of old television trivia the monster looks even less threatening than the bird that would periodically drop down on Groucho Marx’s gameshow You Bet Your Life.

IN THE NEAR FUTURE BALLADEER’S BLOG WILL PRESENT MORE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT MILESTONES. Be here to share the Film Vault Corp’s mission of “safeguarding America’s schlock-culture heritage”.


© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog 2013. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.


Filed under Bad and weird movies, Movie Hosts

41 responses to “THE GIANT CLAW (1957) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT: APRIL OF 1985

  1. Wow! So much like MST3K but earlier!

  2. Cool show and I liked ur review!

  3. Incredibly fun review! And I can’t believe this show came before MST3K! The Texas 27 Film Vault paved the way!

  4. Was the show as funny as ur reviews make it sound?

  5. M S T 3 K R I P O F F ! ! ! !

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  7. Fuck this shit! MST3K did it first!

  8. First I heard of this awesome show! It kind of showed the way for MST3K!

  9. its awesome finding out about this show! MST3K looks a lot less original the more I learn about all these similar shows that came before they did.

  10. This show looks more awesome than MST3K! Not as childish!

  11. The Texas 27 Film Vault must have been a lot of fun!

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  21. I remember seeing this movie on cable! I bet Randy and Richard had a lot of fun with it!

  22. So sorry you may miss the workshop!

  23. Sebastian

    This is one of my all time favorite bad movies!

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