Monthly Archives: July 2010

HOW SWEDE IT IS!

 Former Bethany Swedes head football coach Ted Kessinger was enshrined this past weekend in the College Football Hall Of Fame in South Bend, IN. During his tenure as Bethany College head football coach, Ted Kessinger had an overall record of 219-57-1 and led the Swedes into the NAIA top 25 poll 20 separate times. During his 28 seasons, Bethany College never had a losing season, making him one of the most successful coaches in NAIA history. Division 1 football has Joe Pa, NAIA football had “Teddy the K” (or if you prefer “Tedinger” or maybe “Teddy Kess”) who led the Swedes to 16 Kansas Collegiate Athletic Conference titles and 13 playoff appearances.   
 
Kessinger himself wasn’t short of personal distinction either, winning the Conference Coach of the Year honors 11 times and was the NAIA’s winningest active coach in both percentage of victories and total wins upon retiring in 2003. The former Swedes coach also coached the first American football team to play in Sweden. (I didn’t realize it worked that way! Does that mean if I coach a football team called The Tahitians I can get a head coaching gig in Tahiti? Sweet!) 
 
When talking about his induction into the College Football Hall of Fame Kessinger said, “I wasn’t aware this was coming down the road. It’s a lot to be thankful for.” Today, Kessinger works as a lay minister with Big Brothers Big Sisters and the Kiwanis Club and has been honored by the Kansas branch of the Fellowship of Christian Athletes. He also serves as a special consultant to the Bethany College president.
 
“The College Football Hall of Fame is honored to host so many notable contributors to the game in South Bend, celebrating this tremendous accolade,” said College Football Hall of Fame Executive Director Lisa Klunder. “Enshrinement in the College Football Hall of Fame is a rare distinction shared by only the most accomplished players, and our festival boasts a myriad of events to highlight this extraordinary achievement.”
 
To read this article in Swedish, click here: http://www.bethanyswedes.com/ 

 

Balladeer’s Blog is not affiliated with or operated by the NAIA or any member institutions. 

© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

.

6 Comments

Filed under college football

TODAY’S COOL-NAMED SPORTS TEAM – SOUTH DAKOTA SCHOOL OF MINES

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
  
 
 
 Location: Rapid City, SD
Conference Affiliation: Dakota Athletic Conference
Comment: You know sports teams must be good when they have so many Cafes named after them! (Just be glad I didn’t go with the “Hardrock, Coco and Joe” reference I originally had planned.) What I really want to know is if their marching band does a rendition of Sixteen Ton.
Balladeer’s Blog is not affiliated with or operated by the NAIA or any member institutions.

© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

2 Comments

Filed under Cool names and cool logos

BAD MOVIE: BLOOD (1974)

BLOOD (1974) – Category: Laughably, enjoyably bad, but not fun-bad enough for my highest rating.         This movie is by Andy Milligan, so bad movie buffs know what to expect.  This time out our Staten Island auteur gives us a story about the son of the wolfman and the daughter of Dracula being a married couple. No, it’s not the premise for a wacky new sitcom, it’s an actual attempt at a horror film.

Wolfie Jr is trying to ween his undead bride off her addiction to human blood by substituting a sap produced by his man-eating plants (He creates these Continue reading

13 Comments

Filed under Bad and weird movies

THE WINNER OF THE “COOLEST-NAMED SPORTS TEAMS” CONTEST – THE USAO DROVERS!

Well the votes are all tallied and the most votes for coolest team nickname went to the University of Science and Arts of Oklahoma Drovers! If I had to coin a quick phrase to capture the allure of the Drover mascot it would be Drovers: The 21st Century Name For Cowboys! As always there’s no need to thank me for these impromptu slogans, just shower me with cash. And you can visit the Drovers athletic site at : http://www.usao.edu/usao-sports/ 
 
As the Drovers gallop their way into the Winner’s Circle let’s take a look at the runners up: 
 
In second place were the Ave Maria University Gyrenes  and playing on their nickname’s Marine Corps origins I previously came up with a pithy slogan for them, too: Want to compete? Join the Gyrenes!
Their athletics website is: http://www.amuathletics.com/
 
Third place went to the Bethany College Swedes who in the past few weeks launched a furious “Get out the vote” drive and were only a few votes behind the Gyrenes for second place. Since I don’t have a slogan for the Swedes I’ll go with a cool fact one reader passed along: Under Bethany College football coach Bennie Owen the Swedes defeated the Oklahoma Sooners in 1903 AND 1904! For the Swedes athletics site go here: http://www.bethanyswedes.com/
 
And in descending order, the placement of the remaining teams from my  Top 20 List.
4. Columbia College Fighting Koalas
5. Evergreen State Geoducks
6. Nebraska Wesleyan Prairie Wolves
7. Montana Tech Orediggers
8. Fresno Pacific Sunbirds
10. Cal Maritime Keelhaulers
11. Point Loma Nazarene Sea Lions
12. Brewton Parker Barons
13. Southwestern College Mound Builders
15. Trinity Christian Trolls
16. South Carolina-Beaufort Sand Sharks
18. Jamestown College Jimmies
19. UTB-TSC Scorpions
20. Virginia Intermont Cobras
 
And even though they weren’t on the Top 20 ballot the Rogers State University Hillcats received 4 write-in votes.
 
Well, it’s been a fun contest! Thanks once again to everyone who voted. Reaction to the Top 20 list and to Balladeer’s Blog in general has been far beyond anything I expected. The administration, students and alumni of these NAIA schools have been great.
I’ll be launching another Top 20 list in a different category soon and if it gets the same response the first one did I’ll open up that one for your votes, too.
 
Balladeer’s Blog is not affiliated with or operated by the NAIA or any member institutions.
© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

5 Comments

Filed under Cool names and cool logos

GPAC FOOTBALL SCHEDULE ALERT!!!!!!!!

 

Due to the unfortunate closing of Dana College on June 30th of this year many Great Plains Athletic Conference football teams have been  forced to make changes in their 2010 football schedules. For the latest schedule changes be sure to check the athetics site for your favorite GPAC team or teams.

1 Comment

Filed under college football

AVE MARIA UNIVERSITY BUILDS INTEREST IN THEIR 2011 DEBUT FOOTBALL SEASON BY CONSTRUCTING THE WORLD’S LARGEST FOOTBALL HELMET

 “Building it from the ground up” has been the theme for the Ave Maria University Gyrenes as they prepare for their inaugural NAIA football season in 2011. It could also be the slogan for one of the most ambitious construction projects since the days of the Pharaohs as nearly 3,000 students and residents in Ave Maria, FL have been employed in ’round the clock shifts to erect a massive 819 foot tall replica of the helmets the Gyrenes pigskin team will be wearing.

This enormous replica helmet, seen in the foreground of the above photo, sits majestically on the shores of Lake Gyrene, an artificial lake whose grayish-blue waters lie serenely under the gaze of this monolithic tribute to the “can do” attitude of Ave Maria University Athletics.

Funding for this enormous project came from eccentric billionaire Tony Stark and the attention Stark has received for this unusual undertaking inspired an obviously jealous Mark Cuban to make with his usual paranoid rambling about how nobody ever sees Tony Stark and Iron Man together at the same time. Whatever, Mark!  

I was in Ave Maria, FL recently to cover the excitement that is growing throughout the NAIA for the Gyrenes’ gridiron debut in 2011. 

Gyrenes Head Football Coach Barry Fagan and I took a chartered helicopter up to the top of the replica helmet, set up some lawn chairs and, as we soaked in the panoramic view of the Ave Maria campus, Lake Gyrene and the sprawling metropolis of Ave Maria, I began my interview.

On his way to being the head man for Gyrenes football Coach Fagan’s career saw him take part in a 39-0-2 undefeated streak at Division II Ferris State University, a streak that brought the school 4 consecutive D2 playoff appearances culminating in a trip to the National Semi-Finals. 

In the coach’s career at Hillsdale College, also in D2, the football team made its first playoff appearance in school history. The fact that that feat was accomplished while maintaining the school’s rank as the Number 1 academic institution in all of Division II gives you an idea of the qualities that made Coach Fagan seem the ideal fit for Ave Maria University. He strongly believes that teams can win without compromising on character, intellect or spirituality.

Consistent with that philosophy is the pride Coach Fagan takes in the way his former players will call him up years after graduation and thank him for making them better men and teaching them the necessary things to be successful in life. 

When the coach refused to answer my question regarding how impressed his friends and family were that he got to be interviewed by me I turned the conversation to some of the challenges involved in recruiting for a school that is just launching football.   

Coach Fagan felt there were four major challenges:

1. Getting the recruits to visualize what will be there in the way of facilities, equipment, etc.

2. Having been hired late (Feb.  12) finding kids that are the right fit; academically, athletically, spiritually

3. Educating administrators, faculty and staff on what it will take to get the program off the ground the right way

4. Convincing the recruits that red shirting is a good thing

I suggested that some recruiting difficulties might be overcome with a catchy slogan like “If you don’t mind havin’ a coach named Fagan, it’s a fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine life!” but Coach Fagan reminded me that that bit from Oliver! was the second reference my blog has made to musicals and took a man-card away from me.

When I asked the Coach if he anticipated travel problems since virtually no other NAIA schools in Florida sponsor intercollegiate football he seemed philosophical about the situation:

“We’ll fly once a year to the west coast,  either Menlo College(San Francisco), or Southern Oregon University, ” he stated, “There will be some long bus trips but that is the nature of sub Division I Football…The good thing is that there are many teams that want to travel to Naples, FL.  It is almost like a bowl game for them.  We do not always have to look at a home and home situation.  Some schools are willing to travel two years in a row to our school, especially in late October and early November because of the weather.” 

I asked Coach Fagan to use one word to describe the experience of preparing for Ave Maria University’s first year of NAIA football  and he replied “An adventure.” When I pointed out that that was two words he just rolled his eyes and indicated we should start wrapping up the interview.

By this point I was on my fourth glass of bourbon (Coach Fagan abstained), so I went into “interview wind-down mode” and asked a few non-sports questions. 

Coach Fagan confessed his greatest non-sports passion was his family and since I love discussing bad movies with just about everybody the conversation turned to the most ridiculously bad movie the Coach had ever seen. He felt it was The Last Dragon, an answer that broke the hearts of Taimak fans everywhere (both of them).   

Since we were on the subject of movies I asked the coach what a movie version of the first year of Gyrenes football should be titled and he stated ““Baptism Under Fire” (The Story of Ave Maria University Football)”.

Sounds like an Oscar-winner to me! I’m sure Mark Cuban would love to be a backer to avoid being trumped (as it were) by Tony Stark again over the cultural buzz regarding Gyrenes football.

If you can spot the faces of all 16 previous Chief Justices Of The Supreme Court in this provisional artists’ rendering of the AMU football field you can win $7.00! For details click here:  http://www.amuathletics.com/football/news/33/417/

   

Balladeer’s Blog is not affiliated with or operated by the NAIA or any member institutions.
© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

12 Comments

Filed under college football, humor

TODAY’S COOL-NAMED SPORTS TEAM – LIFE UNIVERSITY

LIFE UNIVERSITY RUNNING EAGLES

 

 Location: Marietta, GA
Conference Affiliation: Association of Independent Institutions 
Major sports: basketball, rugby (technically rugby is club-level, but Life takes rugby to the Nth Degree)
Comment: I guess after rejecting names like “flying turtles” and “swimming kitty cats” as being too odd-sounding common sense prevailed and the good people at Life decided on the nickname Running Eagles for their sports teams.
 

Balladeer’s Blog is not affiliated with or operated by the NAIA or any member institutions.

© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

 

Leave a comment

Filed under Cool names and cool logos

BAD MOVIE: ALIEN LOVER (1975) –

alien loverALIEN LOVER (1975) – CategoryEnjoy-ably campy bad movie elevated by kitsch-value in the casting.
 
***
Pernell Roberts and a really young Captain Janeway (Kate Mulgrew) in her pre-Ryan’s Hope and Mrs. Columbo days add the additional comic value to this made-for-tv horror/sci fi hybrid.
***
It was an hour and a half with commercials so with them edited out it’s just 60-some minutes long. Kate plays a teenaged recovering loony who starts communicating with a teen from another dimension via a broken tv set in the attic of her home. The tv set can absorb
people from our dimension into the alien dimension.

Continue reading

34 Comments

Filed under Bad and weird movies

FROM THE BLUE HOSE TO THE BULLDOGS

Cumberland (TN) Bulldogs football coach Dewayne “Hey HEY Hey” Alexander announced the hiring of former Presbyterian College Blue Hose linebacker Ryan Anderson this week. Anderson will coach linebackers and serve as the football program’s recruiting coordinator.

Anderson graduated from Presbyterian College in August 2009 with a bachelor’s degree in Psychology with minors in Physical Education and Athletic Coaching. He served as an intern with the Big South Conference during his senior year at Presbyterian. 

Anderson joins Matthew Hickmann as part of the “July Gang” of hires for the Cumberland University Bulldogs.

Earlier this week the Bulldog staff denied rumors that they were hiring not Ryan Anderson but Hans Christian Anderson, the Danish author who passed away in 1875 but whose line-backing skills were legendary.

To let the world know you don’t think I’m the least bit funny click here: http://www.cumberland.edu/athletics

Balladeer’s Blog is not affiliated with or operated by the NAIA or any member institutions.

© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Leave a comment

Filed under college football

COUGAR TOWN? A FAMILIAR NAME TOPS THE NAIA COLLEGE FOOTBALL PRESEASON POLL

The University of Sioux Falls Cougars football dynasty may well reign for one more season, at least according to the College Fanz Sports Network NAIA Preseason Top 25 (out of 93 football teams in the NAIA). The Cougars (Don’t go there!), already winners of three of the last four NAIA College Football Championships (and four overall) are looking for a three-peat this season, after defeating the Carroll College (MT) Fighting Saints and the Lindenwood Lions respectively in the past two title games. And oh, yeah, in 2007, the one season in the past four when the Cougars weren’t the champs they still made it all the way to the championship game before falling to the aforementioned Fighting Saints.
 
Let’s take a look at the full Top 25 :  
   1.Sioux Falls Cougars – The High Overlords of the Great Plains Athletic Conference look to continue the NAIA’s longest active winning streak having won their last 29 games in a row. Quarterback Lorenzo Brown is gone but on the defensive side of the ball 2009 National Championship Game Player Of The Game Dominic Studzinski (and keep your Polish Stud jokes to yourself) returns.  Let’s enjoy this act while we still can, NAIA fans. 
2. Lindenwood Lions – The Lions have been the pride (Get it? GET IT?) of the Heart of America Athletic Conference (or “HAAC” for you smokers out there) recently and in last year’s title game gave Sioux Falls almost all they could handle. Obviously Lindenwood has a good chance of getting back to the title game this year but a schedule that’s practically loaded with fellow Top 25 teams may get in the way.
3.Carroll College (MT) Fighting Saints – Not to be confused with the Belligerent Quakers, these Frontier Conference monarchs are a dynasty of their own, winning five NAIA football titles in the past decade. Tight End Bubba Bartlett is back, “deadlier and more powerful than ever before” just like Marvel Comics supervillains. Could be a “senses shattering” season ahead for these boys. ‘Nuff said.
4. Saint Xavier (IL) Cougars – Saint Xavier had a perfect 11-0 regular season in 2009 and were the champs of the Mideast League of the Mid-States Football Association, which I will henceforth refer to as “The Association” like Jim Rome does with the NBA. The Cougars are looking to extend their dominance of The Association to the entire NAIA this season.
5. Morningside College Mustangs – These Mustangs from the Great Plains Athletic Conference have been one of the sixteen teams in the NAIA playoffs the past six years in a row and have advanced to at least the quarter-finals for the past five in a row. The Morningside faithful are hoping to at least win the team’s first conference title since 2005.
That rounds out the Top 5. Now the rest of the Top 10:
  
6. MidAmerica Nazarene Pioneers – The Pioneers are just two years removed from their last Heart Of America Athletic Conference championship. Look for them to blaze a trail back to the playoffs this year.
  
   
 
7. University of the Cumberlands Patriots – For the past three years in a row the Pats have been the champs of the Mid-South Conference East. Try wrapping your head around THAT title.
  
   
   
8. Saint Francis (IN) Cougars – These Cougars hail from The Association (see above) and have to replace no less than seven starters from last year’s NAIA-leading defense.    
    
    
    
9. McKendree Bearcats – Tight End Byron Gettis leads this team from The Association. Last year the Bearcats were undefeated in The Association’s MidWest League.   
   
   
   
10. Missouri Valley Vikings – Under ninth-year head coach Paul Troth this team from the Heart of America Athletic Conference looks to make its fourth post-season appearance in the past five years.  
   
   
   
Now for the remaining teams in the Top 25 and their conference affiliation:
 
 
  11. Minot State Beavers – Dakota Athletic Conference 
 
 
 
 
 
 
                                                       
12. Walsh Cavaliers – Mid States Football Association 
 
  
  
  
                                                        
                                                                                 
13. Hastings College Broncos – Great Plains Athletic Conference 
  
  
  
  
  
  
14. Friends University Falcons – Kansas Collegiate Athletic Conference
 
  
  
  
  
  
 
15. Ottawa (KS) Braves – Kansas Collegiate Athletic Conference
  
  
  
  
 
  
 
16. McPherson Bulldogs – Kansas Collegiate Athletic Conference
 
 
 
 
 
 
17. Northwestern Oklahoma State Rangers – Central States Football League 
  
  
  
  
 
 
18. Grand View Vikings – The Association
 
  
  
  
  
  
  
 
19. Dickinson State Blue Hawks – Dakota Athletic Conference 
  
  
  
  
  
 
  
 
20. Northwestern (IA) Red Raiders – Great Plains Athletic Conference
  
  
  
  
  
  
 
21. Lambuth Eagles – Independent
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
 
22. Langston Lions – Central States Football League 
  
  
  
  
  
  
 
23. Taylor (IN) Trojans – The Association
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
 
24. Eastern Oregon Mountaineers – Frontier Conference 
  
  
  
  
  
  
 
 25. Campbellsville Tigers – Mid South Conference 
  
  
  
 
 
 

 

Football helmets courtesy of The Helmet Project at http://www.nationalchamps.net/Helmet_Project/

Balladeer’s Blog is not affiliated with or operated by the NAIA or any member institutions.

© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog, 2010. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

16 Comments

Filed under college football