Tag Archives: blogging

MARDI GRAS MASSACRE (1978) BAD MOVIE REVIEW

Mardi Gras MassacreMARDI GRAS MASSACRE (1978) – Category: A neglected Bad Movie classic, but its hard-core gore will prevent it from ever having a Plan 9-sized cult following

It takes a twisted sort of genius to make multiple disembowelment murders look boring, but that’s exactly what Jack Weis accomplishes in Mardi Gras Massacre! Today may be Fat Tuesday, but let’s rechristen it “Splat Tuesday” in honor of this late 70’s splatterfest. 

The actual “massacre” part of this movie is an incredible disappointment. An insane, hate-filled man with a knife is roaming around New Orleans during Mardi Gras targeting prostitutes as sacrificial offerings to the Aztec deities he worships.

That sounds promising for a horror film but the disembowelment ritual is reenacted word for word and movement for movement for EACH VICTIM! There is no variation and also no suspense because after the first killing we know exactly how all the subsequent sacrifices will play out. The only chills come from listening to the awful disco music that plays during the Continue reading

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Filed under Bad and weird movies

ANCIENT SCIENCE FICTION: THE LUNARIAN PROFESSOR (1909)

Lunarian ProfessorTHE LUNARIAN PROFESSOR AND HIS REMARKABLE REVELATIONS CONCERNING THE EARTH, THE MOON AND MARS TOGETHER WITH AN ACCOUNT OF THE CRUISE OF THE SALLY ANN (1909) – Written by James B Alexander back in the glory days of titles so long they might not fit in a 140 character limit.

The story is set in 1892, when James Alexander pretends that, while on a fishing trip he encountered a humanoid with a head like a globe, six limbs, large eyes and six wings. The being claims to be a “Lunarian,” a man from our moon.

He is a professor and informs Alexander that he and his fellow Lunarians travel from planet to planet by manipulating gravity. They live in vast underground caverns on the moon, caverns with a breathable atmosphere. Their mastery of gravity is the key to their advanced technology.

The professor’s people have been observing Earth for an untold amount of time. James Alexander even learns that in the distant past humans had to fight intelligently evolving reptiles for planetary supremacy. The cavemen won.

The Lunarians grow vegetation in hydroponic trays and dispose of their dead through a disintegration process that breaks the bodies down into their base elements, thus nothing gets wasted. Though their own culture is socialistic the Lunarians have no shyness about earning profits by selling their advanced technology to other inhabited planets.  

The Lunarians have even developed methods of predicting the future. Alexander asks about Earth’s future and the professor from the moon is happy to lay it all out for the Earthling. Continue reading

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Filed under Ancient Science Fiction

FLASHBACK: CBS/ QUINNIPIAC UNIVERSITY POLL NAMES OBAMA THE WORST PRESIDENT OF THE POST-WORLD WAR TWO ERA

FROM JULY THIRD OF 2014. 

THE WORST U.S. PRESIDENT OF THE POST-WORLD WAR TWO ERA

In the recent CBS News/ Quinnipiac University Poll Americans quite correctly voted Barack Obama the worst U.S. president of the post- World War Two era. How appropriate that, just in time for the July 4th holiday Little Barry Obama won this distinction since he is exactly the type of pompous, clueless, corrupt and self-satisfied ass that we declared our independence from back in 1776!

Congratulations to the poll respondents for absolutely nailing Obama, the quintessential Hollow Man. And the repulsive George W Bush was in 2nd place so that’s equally enjoyable, too!  Continue reading

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Filed under LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion

U.S. PRESIDENTS IN THE MILITARY (A. Johnson-Hayes)

Tomorrow is Presidents Day, so here’s another seasonal post.

ANDREW JOHNSON

Conflict – U.S. Civil War: Service – From 1862-February 1865 Johnson held the rank of general in the Union Army. He held that position as Military Governor of Tennessee and saw no action in the field.

ULYSSES S. GRANT

NOTE: As I observed previously, Washington, Grant and Eisenhower would require thousands of words to capture their full military careers. I will write such blog posts in the near future but for this post I’ll be very brief.

Conflict – Mexican War: Service – From 1846 to 1848 Lieutenant Grant served in Zachary Taylor’s campaigns in northern Mexico and later in Winfield Scott’s campaign to take Mexico City to the south.

Conflict – U.S. Civil War: Service – The heroic Grant rose to command of all the Union’s armies during the 1861-1865 conflict and defeated Confederate General Robert E. Lee. A future blog post will cover his extensive service in the war.    Continue reading

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Filed under Neglected History

COLLEGE BASKETBALL RESULTS FROM BALLADEER’S BLOG: FEB 15th

NJCAA DIVISION THREE

NUMBER ONE ROLLS – The nation’s top ranked RICHLAND COLLEGE THUNDERDUCKS took it on the road against the DALLAS COLLEGE AT CEDAR VALLEY SUNS. By Halftime the Thunderducks had compiled a 39-24 advantage and after the break maintained distance from the Suns for an 80-65 win. Jase Tarver led Richland College with his Double Double of 24 points and 12 rebounds. 

CENTURY CLUB – Teams scoring 100 or more points in Regulation: The (2) SALEM (NJ) COLLEGE MIGHTY OAKS downed the visiting SUSSEX COUNTY COLLEGE SKYLANDERS 104-69   ###   Meanwhile, the OWENS COLLEGE EXPRESS won 110-86 at the HOCKING COLLEGE HAWKS   ###   And the ONONDAGA COLLEGE LAZERS defeated the CAYUGA COLLEGE SPARTANS 102-73. Continue reading

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TEEN TITANS: THE 1976 REVIVAL

This weekend’s light-hearted, escapist superhero post from Balladeer’s Blog looks at the 1976 return of DC ‘s Teen Titans team after a few year hiatus.

TEEN TITANS Vol 1 #44 (Nov 1976)

Title: The Man Who Toppled the Titans

Villain: Dr. Light

Synopsis: Dr. Light captures four of the former members of the Teen Titans – Robin, Wonder Girl, Kid Flash and Speedy (should be called Red Arrow to avoid confusion about his m.o.). He wants to use them as bait in a trap to kill the Justice League. 

Malcolm Duncan, the black friend of the Teen Titans, decides that he will need superpowers to save the former teammates. He dons the exo-skeleton and shield of the Golden Age superhero the Guardian.

As the new Guardian he frees Robin, Wonder Girl, Kid Flash and Speedy. The five of them defeat Dr. Light and decide to stay together to revive the Teen Titans team. Continue reading

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AMERICAN PRESIDENTS: PROS AND CONS

In honor of Presidents Day Weekend here’s my updated look at presidential pros and cons. The original was posted in 2012. It’s light-hearted and irreverent so presidents from all parties get insulted. 

1. GEORGE WASHINGTON

Motto: “Screw taking a salary as a general, just bill ’em outrageously for your expenses!”

Nickname: The First Lady of Broadway 

Pro: Established the precedent of stepping down after 2 terms max.

Con: Owned other human beings.

*

2. JOHN ADAMS 

Motto:  “A day without alienating someone is like a day without sunshine.”

Nickname: Boom-Boom 

Pro: Was almost fanatically honest and never owned other human beings. 

Con: Alienated nearly everyone except his wife Abigail.

* Continue reading

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Filed under Neglected History, opinion

DOES LOVE DIE WITH YOU? BY MIA WINHERTT

DOES LOVE DIE WITH YOU? (2025) – This is the first novel from fellow blogger Mia Winhertt, known previously for her excellent short works. The story is a romantic fantasy so it’s outside my usual type of reading material, but I found it a wonderfully written tale that can’t help but inspire emotional reactions from anyone who has ever been in love but was reluctant to open up about it.

Mia gives us Aaron Philip, who has been in love with Diya Awasthi for seven years but has concealed from her the depth of his emotions. On the day he at long last works up the resolve to confess his love for her he dies in an accident on his way to meet with Diya. Continue reading

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Filed under opinion

U.S. PRESIDENTS IN THE MILITARY (Pierce-Lincoln)

With Presidents Day coming up fast here’s another seasonal post.

FRANKLIN PIERCE

From 1831-1847 Pierce served in the peacetime New Hampshire Militia, rising to the rank of colonel.

Conflict – Mexican War: Service – Because of his experience with military norms and exercises Franklin Pierce was named a General of Volunteers. In 1847 he led his men to Vera Cruz, which had been taken in an amphibious operation in March by General Winfield Scott. He then led his 2,500-strong troop in transporting additional supplies for Scott despite guerilla attacks and fighting in his ongoing campaign to take Mexico City.

General Pierce saw further action in battles at Contreras, Churubusco, Molina del Ray, Chapultepec and Mexico City itself. Pierce had an unfortunate tendency toward undignified injuries, and an early bashing of his testicles caused complications which surfaced again and again throughout the war. Continue reading

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Filed under Neglected History

EL MARIACHI: THE SERIES (2014)

With the ongoing tragic events in Mexico, here’s a melancholy repost from several years ago of my look at the short-lived television series version of the El Mariachi movies. 

el mariachi tv seriesEL MARIACHI (2014) – This Mexican television series directed by Salvador Cartas was loosely based on the 1992 Robert Rodriguez movie of the same name and its sequels, Desperado (1995) and Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003). It’s no secret that Rodriguez himself is not fond of this series. According to some sources Sony allegedly made a tentative notification of their plans to the writer/ director and then ran with it without further input from him.

Regular readers of Balladeer’s Blog know how much I love and praise the original El Mariachi movies. The title character, who starts out the trilogy as a struggling mariachi guitar player who winds up having to go all Die Hard on Mexican drug cartels, was played by Carlos Gallardo in 1992 and then Antonio Banderas in 1995 and 2003.

martha h bladeThe series of movies certainly seemed to partially inspire the later Sicario films, but I much prefer Rodriguez’s flicks. The El Mariachi television program is, unfortunately, inferior to both franchises. That’s a shame because lead actor Ivan Arana certainly looks the part and Martha Higareda as the hero’s love interest Celeste is just the right mix of sultriness and butt-kicking badness. For some reason photos of Higareda don’t come close to capturing her full allure but seen in motion she’s even more impressive.

Like in the Robert Rodriguez films, the up-and-coming mariachi player is mistaken for a Mexican criminal who is carrying a similar guitar case. From there he gets caught up in a battle with Mexico’s ever more powerful drug cartels.
Continue reading

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Filed under Forgotten Television