Category Archives: Bad and weird movies

HORROR OF PARTY BEACH (1964) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

Randy Clower and Richard Malmos of The Texas 27 Film Vault (both lower right) featured in a Movie Host article with Stella from Saturday Night Dead and Elvira.

Before MST3K we had The Texas 27 Film Vault, which debuted on Saturday February 9th, 1985. Balladeer’s Blog continues marking the cult show’s FORTIETH ANNIVERSARY YEAR with another episode where an original broadcast date can be narrowed down. 

EPISODE ORIGINALLY BROADCAST: Saturday May 25th, 1985 from 10:30pm to 1:00am. Broadcast throughout Texas and Oklahoma. Special thanks to my fellow Texas 27 Film Vault fan Jana for the date of this episode and which serial preceded the movie.

SERIAL: The Phantom Empire (1935), in which Gene Autry played a singing cowboy who saves the world from an advanced underground civilization complete with killer robots who wear cowboy hats.

FILM VAULT LORE: Randy and Richard, both sons of military men, had come up with a very detailed back-story for their fictional Film Vault Corps. Back before the Corps members found themselves protecting old movies from gigantic rats, celluloid-eating cellumites and subterranean Drone species the FVC got its start during the Great Depression. 

FDR’s Works Progress Administration engineered the first Film Vaults beneath America’s major cities. Each subterranean vault was as large as an aircraft carrier and they were originally used to store the monumental film collection of FDR friend Larry Alexander Finley of Frankfort, KY.

Eventually the vaults were used to house the superannuated Golden Turkeys and camp classics that local television stations across the country filled their late-night hours with. The vaults also housed other bits of cultural kitsch like old commercials and tv shows and such. 

THE MOVIE: Horror of Party Beach is one of those flicks that is on EVERYBODY’S Worst Films of All Time list and has been for several decades. In the 1980s the Medved Brothers’ books on Golden Turkeys helped secure its reputation. Just about every Movie Host show presented this film at some point.

Radioactive waste dumped in the sea spawns a tribe of large, goofy-looking, carnivorous sea monsters who walk on two legs and have so many big tongues they seem to have bouquets of hot dogs in their mouths.  Continue reading

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IT! THE TERROR FROM BEYOND SPACE (1958) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

IN THE MIDDLE 1980s/ WAY DOWN ON LEVEL 31 …

Before MST3K there was The Texas 27 Film Vault! Balladeer’s Blog continues its examination of this neglected cult show from the 1980s in this FORTIETH ANNIVERSARY YEAR of its 1985 debut. Randy and Richard, our machine-gun toting members of the Film Vault Corps (“the few, the proud, the sarcastic”) do their usual bit of showing an old serial then showing a bad movie.

Thanks to my 2011 interview with Randy Clower, the show’s co-creator and co-star and thanks to my research through VERY old newspapers plus emailed memories from other T27FV fans I’m taking a look at another episode of the show where a broadcast date can be determined. 

ORIGINALLY BROADCAST: Saturday July 12th, 1986 from 10:30pm to 1:00am. Broadcast throughout Texas and Oklahoma. 

SERIAL: ATOM MAN VS SUPERMAN (1950) – Kirk Alyn starred as Superman with Lyle Talbot as his archenemy Lex Luthor. Especially laughable are the bits when Superman “flies” – an effect achieved by switching from live footage of Kirk Alyn to INSERTED CARTOON FOOTAGE of Superman flying. Think of the ‘Toons in Roger Rabbit interacting with the live characters & backgrounds and you have the idea. 

FILM VAULT LORE: This episode of The Texas 27 Film Vault was the first to come with a Viewer Discretion warning. Gore effects fans were in Nirvana this night as Film Vault Corps member Joe “The Hypnotic Eye” Riley was given full reign for some of his most graphic effects work during the comedy sketches or Host Segments if you prefer. 

Behind the scenes preparation for the episode’s Film Vault Players sketches.

Direct from the Film Vault Corps Academy in Leadville, Colorado, the Academy’s Little Theater Group was touring Film Vaults across the country. Tonight they were performing on Level 31 of the Film Vault underneath Dallas, where the show was set. 

The Little Theater Group was reenacting scenes from famous alien monster movies and since It! The Terror from Beyond Space was a partial inspiration for the original Alien, the chest-burster scene was reenacted in darkly comic glory! (As if the chow in the Film Vault Commissary wasn’t unappetizing enough already!)

THE MOVIE: It! The Terror from Beyond Space is one of the consummate low budget schlockers of the 1950s. It embodies the “so bad it’s good” aesthetic that so many Movie Host shows have always reveled in.

In the far-off year 1973 (LMAO) a very fake-looking space-ship on an even more fake-looking matte-painting of a Martian landscape has come to rescue the sole survivor of the previous mission to the Red Planet. Continue reading

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RETURN OF THE FLY (1959) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

*** FEATURING A MAJOR MILESTONE IN THE SHOW’S HISTORY ***

In the middle 1980s The Texas 27 Film Vault was the show to watch on Saturday nights to see “Film Vault Technicians First Class” Randy Clower and Richard Malmos show and mock bad and campy movies preceded by episodes of old serials. Machine-gun toting Randy and Richard would also have comedic sci-fi adventures before and after commercial breaks. 

For the program’s FORTIETH ANNIVERSARY YEAR Balladeer’s Blog continues its examination of this neglected cult series via my research into really old newspapers, my 2011 interview with Randy Clower and recollections from my fellow fans of this show. Here’s another review of the movie shown by Randy and Richard when a date can be verified. 

EPISODE ORIGINALLY BROADCAST: Saturday August 9th, 1986 from 10:30pm to 1am. Broadcast throughout Texas and Oklahoma.  * Special thanks to my fellow T27FV fan Spearman for the date.

SERIAL: Before the movie an episode of the 1950 Columbia serial Atom Man vs Superman was shown. Kirk Alyn starred as Superman with Lyle Talbot as his archenemy Lex Luthor. Lex has his own secret identity in this serial – each episode he dons a lead mask and oversees the villainy as “Atom Man”. 

This was one of the liveliest and most campily watchable serials of the 50s. Especially laughable are the bits when Superman “flies” – an effect achieved by switching from live footage of Kirk Alyn to INSERTED CARTOON FOOTAGE of Superman flying. Think of the ‘Toons in Roger Rabbit interacting with the live backgrounds and you have the idea.   

Richard (left) and Randy interviewing Vincent Price

FILM VAULT LORE: Our boys of the Film Vault Corps (“the few … the proud … the sarcastic”) interviewed Vincent Price, one of the stars of this week’s movie. Like the showing of Return of the Fly it was used to promote Randy and Richard’s upcoming public appearance at the Dallas debut of David Cronenberg’s remake of The Fly(More on that public appearance after the movie review.)

THE MOVIE: Return of the Fly is a black and white sequel to the technicolor original film. Brett Halsey, who played driven and tormented teens in a few films back then plays the driven and tormented Philippe DeLambre, the son of Andre DeLambre from the original film The Fly. It’s supposed to be 15 years later, but Vincent Price, reprising his role as Francois Delambre, Andre’s brother, hasn’t aged a bit! Continue reading

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BLACK RAIN (1977) AUSTRALIAN FILM

BLACK RAIN, also released as THE LAST WAVE (1977) – This was Aussie director Peter Weir’s eerie follow-up to Picnic at Hanging Rock from 1975. If you found the excellent 1975 movie perplexing, Black Rain will redefine that word for you.

It’s pure Peter Weir but if you want outside comparisons think of an X-Files episode crossed with Prince of Darkness and directed by David Lynch. Australia is suddenly struck by bizarre weather phenomena like weapons-grade torrential downpours and huge hailstones that break windows and leave occupants bloodied.

A plague of frogs, oddly dark skies and then a multi-day rain event follow, providing an otherworldly background to the story in the foreground. 

Richard Chamberlain stars as tax lawyer David Burton in that story. He and his wife Annie (Olivia Hamnett) live in a small outback town. As a result of Australia’s Legal Aid policy, David is assigned to defend four Aborigines in a murder case even though he hasn’t done criminal trial work in years.

He’s the nearest Legal Aid lawyer in the area, plus there are indications that the government doesn’t really care if the Aborigines get proper representation. Draftee David dives into his law books to refresh his familiarity with criminal law.    Continue reading

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THE FOOD OF THE GODS (1976) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

Balladeer’s Blog continues celebrating the FORTIETH anniversary year of this neglected cult show which debuted Saturday night February 9th, 1985. As I often mention, before MST3K came The Texas 27 Film Vault. Before Joel and Mike came Randy and Richard. Before Devil Dogs, Pearl and Deep 13 came Cellumites, Laurie Savino and Level 31.

This show was broadcast throughout Texas and Oklahoma on Saturday nights from 10:30PM to 1:00AM.

MOVIE: The Food of the Gods (1976). 

ORIGINAL BROADCAST DATE: Sometime in 1985, possibly February or March. Some info points to this being the first episode in which Randy and Richard used their machine guns and “prop-pack” mini-copters to fight giant rats from deep in the Earth. Given how central the giant rats would be going forward IF that can be verified it would make this a pretty pivotal episode of The Texas 27 Film Vault.

SERIAL: IF the February or March of 1985 date is correct – and that’s still up in the air – then the serial episode would definitely have been from The Lost City (1935). That serial dealt with a mad scientist and his futuristic city hidden in the African jungle.

COMEDY SKETCHES: The Film Vault Corps (“The few, the proud, the sarcastic”), led by Randy, Richard and Ken “Tex” Miller POSSIBLY taking on the first of many packs of giant rats. The effects, models and dolls of the human figures would – for humor’s sake – have been INTENTIONALLY as cheesy as the kind Bert I. Gordon used in The Food of the Gods and so many of his other “gigantic monster” films.

THE FOOD OF THE GODS – This was one of the many, MANY “size change” movies of Bert I Gordon, “Mister B.I.G.” himself. (Amazing Colossal Man, Attack of the Puppet People, Earth vs the Spider, Beginning of the End, War of the Colossal Beast, The Cyclops, Village of the Giants, Empire of the Ants, etc.) 

The Food of the Gods was very loosely based on part of H.G. Wells’ novel of the same name. Gordon’s Village of the Giants, about a gang of giant-sized teenagers, was likewise loosely based on an often-forgotten section of that novel. Continue reading

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THE GIANT CLAW (1957) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

The Secret of the Bermuda Triangle Revealed

Before MST3K we had … The Texas 27 Film Vault! Before Joel and Mike there was Randy and Richard! Balladeer’s Blog continues celebrating the FORTIETH anniversary year of this neglected cult show which debuted Saturday night February 9th, 1985.

MOVIE: The Giant Claw (1957)

ORIGINAL BROADCAST DATE: Saturday April 6th, 1985 from 10:30pm to 1:00am. Broadcast throughout Texas and Oklahoma.

SERIAL: The Lost City (1935) about a mad scientist who rules a high-tech city in the middle of the African jungle.

Randy (right) and Richard way down on Level 31 hosting The Texas 27 Film Vault

Film Vault Lore: Thank you to my fellow T27FV fan Dolores for this episode’s date, the serial and for this quote about Ken Miller, who played “Tex” on the show: “I loved the random bits of madness added by the gung-ho Tex each episode! He always reminded me of Robert Duvall’s character Kilgore from Apocalypse Now.

The Movie: The Giant Claw is another of those staples of bad movie shows. It’s been presented by just about every Movie Host program at one time or another. Because of the film’s familiarity I will keep this review short.

Global UFO sightings turn out to be sightings of a gigantic (and ridiculous-looking) flying buzzard from outer space. As if that isn’t silly enough the destructive creature is also an ANTI-MATTER gigantic flying buzzard from outer space. Continue reading

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BILLY THE KID VS DRACULA (1966) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

Before MST3K there was The Texas 27 Film Vault. Before Joel and Mike there was Randy and Richard! Before Deep 13 there was Level 31.

Balladeer’s Blog continues its celebration of the program’s FORTIETH anniversary year. Beginning on Saturday February 9th, 1985 “Film Vault Technicians First Class” Randy and Richard presented old serials and bad or campy movies while wielding their machine guns in defense of “America’s schlock-culture heritage.”

MOVIE: Billy the Kid vs Dracula (1966)    

ORIGINAL BROADCAST DATE: Saturday May 18th, 1985 from 10:30pm to 1:00am. Broadcast throughout Texas and Oklahoma. 

SERIAL: Before showing and mocking John Carradine’s Billy the Kid vs Dracula our members of the Film Vault Corps (“the few, the proud, the sarcastic”) showed and mocked an episode of the Mascot Serial The Phantom Empire (1935). 

In that classically campy serial Gene Autry played a singing cowboy who saves the world from an  advanced underground civilization that comes complete with killer robots who wear cowboy hats. Continue reading

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MARS NEEDS WOMEN (1967) AND NIGHT FRIGHT (1967) ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

Richard (left) and Randy between takes on The Texas 27 Film Vault.

THE FORTIETH ANNIVERSARY YEAR OF THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT CONTINUES! On February 9th, 1985 this pre-MST3K bad movie show debuted and ran for a few years. When it went off the air Joe Bob’s Drive-In began airing from the same studio formerly used by T27FV.

This Dallas Double Feature originally aired: Saturday May 10th, 1986 from 10:30pm to 2:30am. Broadcast throughout Texas and Oklahoma.

A behind the scenes photo of Laurie Savino, who held the rank of Mystery Clip Technician in the Film Vault Corps.

Film Vault Lore: Usually The Texas 27 Film Vault ran 2 1/2 hours, from 10:30pm to 1am, and would feature machine-gun toting Randy Clower and Richard Malmos presenting episodes of old Republic serials followed by a cult movie. 

        On this night Randy, Richard, Tex, Joe “The Hypnotic Eye” Riley, Laurie Savino and the rest of the Film Vault Corps (“the few … the proud … the sarcastic”) presented a special called The Dallas Double Feature. The episode dispensed with a serial and showed (and mocked) two films made in Texas, one by Larry Buchanan and the other by Russ Marker.

Tommy Kirk’s Greatest Moment

MARS NEEDS WOMEN (1967) – Texas’ Larry Buchanan is partially known for low-budget remakes of many AIP schlock films, from Zontar the Thing from Venus (a remake of It Conquered The World), to Attack of the the (sic) Eye Creatures (a remake of Invasion of the Saucermen) and others.

Mars Needs Women sports many scenes beloved by all of us bad movie geeks. Think of the army translating a message from space with the tech saying “Sir … the message reads three words … Mars … Needs … Women.”  Continue reading

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QUEEN OF BLOOD (1966) BAD MOVIE ON THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT

THE FORTIETH ANNIVERSARY YEAR OF THE TEXAS 27 FILM VAULT CONTINUES! In the middle 1980s/ Way down on Level 31 came this pre-MST3K show about bad and campy movies. Film Vault Technicians 1st Class Richard Malmos and Randy Clower hosted the show along with their friend and cocreator Ken Miller as Tex plus Laurie Savino as the Film Vault Corps’ Mystery Clip Technician. 

QUEEN OF BLOOD (1966)  

Originally aired on T27FV: Saturday May 3rd, 1986 from 10:30pm to 1am. Broadcast throughout Texas and Oklahoma.

Extras: The Texas 27 Film Vault ran 2 1/2 hours, so Randy and Richard had more time to work with than many other Movie Host shows. In addition to showing the movie, mocking the movie and featuring Film Vault Corps comedy sketches this episode presented the 12th and final chapter of the 1952 serial Radar Men from the Moon plus an interview with Forry Ackerman. (I think there’s more footage of Ackerman than there is of some U.S. presidents.)

If the only bad movie show you know is MST3K think of: Women of the Prehistoric Planet, First Spaceship on Venus and Humanoid Woman. Continue reading

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TEXAS TWENTY-SEVEN FILM VAULT: FORTIETH ANNIVERSARY YEAR

1a randy and richard

Randy (right) and Richard way down on Level 31 hosting The Texas 27 Film Vault

Balladeer’s Blog’s fondness for the old Movie Host Shows of long ago has been well established. Sunday was the Fortieth Anniversary of the very first episode of The Texas 27 Film Vault from Saturday, February 9th of 1985. Before Joel and Mike there was Randy and Richard, as I often mention. 

My psychotically obsessive research on the show has yielded a lot of info over the years but I have worn out every source I could find.

Even the show’s co-host and co-creator Randy Clower has been bled dry of information on the show by me. Over the years other fans of the show – and a special shout-out goes to “the Cap’n” – have provided info here and there that often led me to concrete source material.

Anyway, here are some movies that we all have general, varied reasons to believe were shown on The Texas 27 Film Vault but I need original broadcast dates, info on comedy sketches or movie ticket give-aways, etc. Episodes aired for 2 and a half hours Saturday nights from 10:30pm to 1:00am in Texas and Oklahoma.

Fiend without a faceFIEND WITH-OUT A FACE (1958)

The Film: “Thought Monsters” leech into atomic energy, then extract human brains and spinal columns to use as their corporeal forms. This is a Bad Movie Classic remembered largely because of the scenes where the flying brains, sporting antennae, attack their prey, with their spinal cord “tails” streaming along behind them.     

Serial Episode: No idea, for now.

Reason for believing it was shown: Some of the Flying Brain Creatures are on the 1987 Texas 27 Film Vault poster. Continue reading

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