DuneBalladeer’s Blog remains the only site on the web that equally criticizes both Democrats and Republicans, depending on which party has been committing greater offenses at the moment.

Reader reaction to my blog post which depicted America and our corrupt political parties as part of the Alien franchise (HERE) was impressive so here is a tongue in cheek look at the U.S. as part of the Dune franchise.

First, my traditional opening to such posts:

“We’re a world of 7 billion people, 10 billion blogs and 20 billion political poses.”

Paul MuadDibTHE FREMEN – These are American VOTERS who heroically endure the harsh, ugly conditions that the hopelessly corrupt and outdated Houses have imposed on the nation.

The bizarre throwback to a feudal culture resulting from the destructive, self-serving policies of those two Houses has become more and more apparent with each passing year. The gap between the haves and have-nots was never clearer than in the past six months.

Still the Fremen soldier on, trying to eke out a living and preserve what few of their liberties remain to them while striking back at their callous and uncaring oppressors whenever they can. The only hope for the future rests with the Fremen/ Voters, certainly not the would-be aristocrats of the venal Houses.

Baron HarkonnenHOUSE HARKONNEN – Needless to say, these are the DEMOCRATS, the most vile and mercilessly totalitarian of the Houses which treat the voters like peasants and cannon fodder.

The Democrats run rings around their rival Houses with their cynical exploitation of crises and tragedies which befall the nation. The conscienceless trash of this House carry out their strategy of “Oppressing people while posing as the oppressed” in increasingly blatant and brutal fashion. Merely expressing an opinion dissenting from the Democrat Party line is considered grounds for loss of one’s livelihood and access to assorted online tools necessary for modern life.

The Democrats’ propaganda outlets act as a virtual Gestapo for the party, turning members of the poor and the working class into Enemies of the State if they dare to publicly question the callous Democrat juggernaut. Entire cities are reduced to War Zones at the command of Democrat political and media operatives if the Party perceives an advantage in it.

George W Bush facesHOUSE CORRINO – These are the REPUBLICANS, the stuffy, selfish, banal plutocrats who would LOVE to be as successfully corrupt and Machiavellian as the Democrats but are always left choking on the dust in which their rivals leave them.

The Democrats masterfully manipulate the patrician airs of Republican trash like the Bush Family, Mitt Romney and so many others to get their way while the Republican trash are always left bewildered and defeated. The faded, dying, would-be Imperial Republicans understand nothing but wealth while their rival House understands POWER and that wealth will follow that power.

The Republican Old Guard feel every bit as much distaste for the Fremen as the Democrats do, but the Democrats skillfully outmaneuver them at every turn. The contemptible Republican establishment pathetically envies the savvy and ruthlessness of their rivals to the point where they turn on their own constituents on a regular basis just for a few moments of positive coverage by the Democrats’ propaganda outlets.

Republican money and power people idiotically think that the two-party system will somehow survive on its historical inertia (they certainly can’t be bothered to actually DO something), while the conniving Democrats have been treacherously working toward One Party Rule for decades.

House AtreidesHOUSE ATREIDES – This fallen and nearly extinct House would be represented by America’s actual underlying political structure and Constitution, including the Separation of Powers and – most importantly – the Bill of Rights.

Virtually every last vestige of that structure has been eliminated by the vice and corruption of the two destructive major Houses, the Democrats and Republicans, as their tentacles have reached into all three branches of government.   

Political parties are not mentioned anywhere in the Constitution but the Democrats and Republicans have grafted (play on words intended) themselves onto the Body Politic like a cancer. That dual cancer has spread so thoroughly that it may be impossible to remove it without killing the patient. 

CNNPROPAGANDA OUTLETS – In Dune the Great Houses openly admitted to using propaganda outlets. Here in the U.S. propaganda masquerades as “news.”

The Democrats have what seems like a hundred propaganda outlets to every one that the weak-willed Republicans have funded. Republicans are terrified of “splitting audience share” while the Democrats are interested only in saturating the country with their talking points no matter the cost in mere money.

*** As we all know, the Fremen and the pitifully few remnants of House Atreides ultimately came out on top, but this real-life conflict may not end that way.

© Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog 2020. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Edward Wozniak and Balladeer’s Blog with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.                 


Filed under humor, LIBERALS AND CONSERVATIVES, opinion


  1. A Texan

    That’s one thing the brain dead left does not understand or likes to be functionally stupid about. I listen to a conservative black local talk show host down here in South Texas. He has on the spokesman of Latinos for Trump who this fiery Latina. Anyway, few of us who voted Trump are happy with the garbage provided by the Republican Party in Texas. Trump certainly has some deficiencies, but it’s clear the entire GOPe/ Democratic establishment are aligned against him.

    Abbot has been better than Perry, but lame in many other ways. Cornyn won the senate primary, and yet helped other Republicans to pass a bill to give over a half million green cards. However, I’m stuck voting for him since his radicalized candidate is worse.

    We also have a Bush family member in Texas State government that thinks he entitled to other elected positions. I guess he is not wealthy enough to find some other ways to occupy his time. (Hey northerners, call Bush back to the northeast; he is about as Texan as Bill Clinton is monogamous).

    • Thanks for the comment! I can imagine how you feel. And yes, I’m not kidding when I call Trump a de facto Third Party President because like you say he is opposed by both corrupt party establishments. And part of your comment reminds me of why that one African-American LEO who supports Trump says he doesn’t switch parties to become a Republican – because Republicans love turning on each other. That is absurd the way that Bush continues to haunt Texas.

  2. Mindy

    I was glad to see you didn’t pick the Rethuglicans for House Atreidies.

  3. Oddie

    I’m so glad you didn’t make the Republicans be House Atreides.

  4. Mopey J

    You word these so great my man!

  5. Milly

    Democrats are even worse than the Harkonnens.

  6. Benny

    I think the Democrats are set on another Civil War. Let’s hope they lose this one, too.

  7. za21

    I love this! The Democrats really are as disgusting as the Harkonnens! Good call!

  8. Kosmicbytes

    Our only hope is for Trump to get reelected since he’s not really a product of either the democrats or the republicans.

  9. Almighty Kue

    Perfect! Democrats are scum and Republicans are scum. Trump is the only one worth cheering on because he has helped the poor!

  10. herbsta magus

    Perfect! The democrats as the Harkonnens and republicans as the Corrinos! You rock!

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