YOU WANT ALIEN VAMPIRES IN NAZI UNIFORMS? MY LATEST BAD MOVIE PAGE UPDATE!

Here’s the latest review I added to my Bad Movie page. It’s ALABAMA’S GHOST from 1973 by Fred Hobbs, the same man who brought us The Godmonster Of Indian Flats.  If you want more reviews of under-the- radar bad movies click here: https://glitternight.com/bad-movies/ 

ALABAMA’S GHOST – (1973) – Category: Bad enough and with an enjoyably weird premise, but not fun-bad enough for my highest rating           This film has vampires … No, wait! There’s MORE! They’re NAZI vampires … No, wait! There’s still more! They’re Nazi vampires from outer space! And they’re trying to take over the world by using “Raw Zeta” and an Afican American stage magician called Alabama as a “human hypno- microphone”.

The reason they’re specifically Nazi vampires seems to be because Adolf Hitler was the previous human hypno- microphone they used in their last bid for global domination (but whether the Nazis got their kinky fashion sense from the aliens or if it was their own contribution to the partnership the film doesn’t specify).

The alien Nazi vampires at one point use a conveyor belt of human victims for them all to munch on in a scene reminiscent of Lucy working at the chocolate factory. Best of all the bad guys have a female mad scientist named Dr Caligula. One of the elements of this film that elevates it to the realm of the transcendentally bad is the fact that it takes a character with the infinitely cool name Dr Caligula and limits her to a total of about a minute and a half of screen time! Now THAT’S the kind of self-defeating blunder that true bad movie lovers will drool over!

Many viewers (and reviewers) mistakenly think the lead heavy in the wheelchair is Dr Caligula, but that’s not so. “Wheelchair man” contributes his own moments of joyous insanity to the flick, primarily with his wardrobe. This guy wears military- style uniforms so outrageously ostentatious that even Napoleon’s Marshall Murat would look at them and say “My God, that’s gaudy!” (Just to prove that my pompous and thoroughly inappropriate analogies aren’t limited to the sports sections of this blog)

There’s also motorcycles, ghosts, an android duplicate of Alabama, elephants (?) and at one point our hero drives a bizarre car I call the Alabama-Mobile just to make a Batmobile joke and a geography joke all at once.

This film teaches us that vampires can be killed by getting stepped on by elephants when a pachyderm stampede wipes out most of them. There’s also a lady who refers to things we haven’t seen from scenes that may not have even been filmed before the filmmakers ran out of money. 

Oh, and for Al Capp fans there’s a New Orleans nightclub called Earthquake McGoon’s! Some people categorize this as a blaxploitation horror film, but in my book that’s unnecessarily pigeon-holing a movie that defies genre assignment.

My favorite non-sequitur piece of dialogue from this film is “The only vampires I know all moved to the suburbs after Prohibition ended.” Beautiful! 

14 Comments

Filed under Bad and weird movies

14 responses to “YOU WANT ALIEN VAMPIRES IN NAZI UNIFORMS? MY LATEST BAD MOVIE PAGE UPDATE!

  1. I love your sense of humor and your taste in bad movies. Are you married?

  2. Wonderful blog! We share the same twisted sense of humor.

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  4. Where do you find all the topics you write about? It’s like you live in your own strange universe and I love it!

  5. I want to marry you! I love your sense of humor and your wild posts!

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