NAIA
ONE AND TWO ROLL – The number 1 team in the nation – the GRACE COLLEGE LANCERS – downed their hosts the GOSHEN COLLEGE MAPLE LEAFS by a Century Club score of 108-78. ### While elsewhere, the 2nd ranked LANGSTON UNIVERSITY LIONS (should be the Hugheses) obliterated the visiting SOUTHWESTERN CHRISTIAN UNIVERSITY EAGLES by another Century Club score of 100-59.
OVERTIME THRILLS – The (14) LOURDES UNIVERSITY GRAY WOLVES used OT to defeat the MADONNA UNIVERSITY CRUSADERS 81-68 ### Meanwhile, the UNIVERSITY OF JAMESTOWN JIMMIES survived a 109-108 visit to the MIDLAND U. WARRIORS ### And the (7) MONTANA TECH OREDIGGERS won 85-80 over the (15) ROCKY MOUNTAIN COLLEGE BATTLIN’ BEARS.
HUSTLING – This game pitted the (24) OREGON TECH HUSTLIN’ OWLS against the visiting MULTNOMAH UNIVERSITY LIONS. At Halftime the score was knotted up at 34-34, but after the break the Hustlin’ Owls managed to get some separation from Multnomah for an 82-75 win. Jay Elmore led Oregon Tech with 16 points, while teammate Keegan Shivers notched a Double Double of 14 points and 13 rebounds.
THE COOLER-NAMED TEAM WINS – The BUSHNELL UNIVERSITY BEACONS defeated their guests the NORTHWEST (WA) EAGLES by a final score of 96-82 ### Elsewhere, the UNIVERSITY OF ST. KATHARINE FIREBIRDS won 87-78 over the BENEDICTINE UNIVERSITY AT MESA RED HAWKS ### And the LSU-ALEXANDRIA GENERALS downed their hosts the JARVIS CHRISTIAN UNIVERSITY BULLDOGS 72-67.
NAILBITER – The MENLO COLLEGE OAKS hosted the OTTAWA UNIVERSITY (AZ) SPIRIT in this game. The Oaks were clinging to a 41-40 edge at the Half, and from there things remained very tight the rest of the way as Menlo College snuck past the Spirit 85-83. Landon Seaman led the Oaks in scoring with 27 points.
MARATHON GAME OF THE DAY – The DOANE UNIVERSITY TIGERS took the court against the visiting BRIAR CLIFF UNIVERSITY CHARGERS yesterday. A 30-28 Halftime edge for the Chargers became a 61-61 tie to end Regulation. The 1st OT saw a 73-73 deadlock, while the 2nd and 3rd OTs ended in scores of 82-82 and 90-90 respectively. In the FOURTH OVERTIME the Tigers won out 105-102. Brady Timm’s 41 points led Doane.
WHY DON’T WE DO IT ON THE ROAD? – The ST. MARY OF THE WOODS COLLEGE POMEROYS logged a 62-52 road victory over the RIO GRANDE (OH) UNIVERSITY RED STORM ### The HASKELL INDIAN NATIONS UNIVERSITY INDIANS triumphed over their hosts the WILLIAMS BAPTIST UNIVERSITY EAGLES 88-69 ### And the LIFE UNIVERSITY RUNNING EAGLES won 86-68 at the LOYOLA (LA) WOLFPACK.
LIKE A VIRGIN ISLAND – In this game the UNIVERSITY OF THE VIRGIN ISLANDS BUCCANEERS (should be the Islanders) hosted the OAKWOOD UNIVERSITY AMBASSADORS. The Buccaneers were on top 37-29 at Halftime and kept the Ambassadors at arm’s length the entire 2nd Half for a 76-68 victory. Twenty points from Jalil Langston led the way for UVI.
CENTURY CLUB – The storied UNIVERSITY OF SCIENCE & ARTS OF OKLAHOMA DROVERS humiliated the OKLAHOMA PANHANDLE STATE AGGIES (should be Okies) to the tune of 111-74 ### Meanwhile, the DICKINSON STATE BLUE HAWKS smacked down the BRIERCREST COLLEGE & SEMINARY CLIPPERS 105-83 ### And THE MASTER’S UNIVERSITY MUSTANGS won 102-91 at the VANGUARD UNIVERSITY LIONS.
STRIKING GOLD – The (21) XAVIER UNIVERSITY (LA) GOLD RUSH took it on the road against the OUR LADY OF THE LAKE UNIVERSITY SAINTS. The Saints were up 44-40 at the midpoint of the game, but the Gold Rush came out of the locker room primed for a comeback. XULA wound up winning by a final score of 88-81. Cory Wells tossed in 25 points to lead the Gold Rush.
CALL AN AMBULANCE – The MAYVILLE STATE COMETS hosted the UNIVERSITY OF SAINT BONIFACE ROUGES on Saturday. The Comets delivered such a brutal annihilation of their opponents that the Rouges should just burn the game tape and deny ever having been in North Dakota yesterday. By Halftime, Mayville State was already leading SEVENTY to EIGHTEEN on their way to a ONE HUNDRED THIRTY-SEVEN to THIRTY-SIX victory. (USB was THIS close to at least pulling to within 100 points of their opponents!) Darren Jones’ 21 points led the Comets.
Um, just so’s you know. S.H.I.T. has suspended all intercollegiate sports programs. Institute Dean of Sports, Tbird Ford, attributes that to economic shortfall in the college budget due to Blue Policies, but I rather suspect it has more to do with the fact that not once did Balladmaster’s Sports Recaps mention [let alone highlight] S.H.I.T. team play. Word on the street [that is, in and around Telegraph Road and Wixom Boulevard] is that any surplus funding will be reallocated to the Welding Arts program and Studies in Metropolitan Sewerage Sciences. Don’t feel bad about it, Balladmaster; Dean Ford has been anti-sports for as long as I’ve known him.
Hilarious! Tbird Ford is a menace to collegiate athletics!
Happy New Year !
Thanks! Happy New Year to you, too!