TOP 25 POLL ONE-LINERS: OCT 26TH

As promised this week it’s D2 Football’s turn for One-Liners and as always links to the other Top 25 Polls will be at the end of this post. Next week I’ll move on to another sport.

NCAA Division 2 Football

1. GRAND VALLEY STATE LAKERS – 8-0 – The Lakers have been a D2 football power since before Notre Dame’s current Head Coach Brian Kelly was still coaching them.

2. UMD BULLDOGS – 8-0 – The Bulldogs were D2 Champs as recently as 2008 and are tearing up the Northern Sun Intercollegiate Conference in preparation for a huge playoff run.

3. ABILENE CHRISTIAN WILDCATS – 8-0 – We’ve all heard about how the fathers of Colt McCoy and Jordan Shipley were teammates at ACU so many times, so what the heck! Once more won’t hurt anybody!

4. NORTHWEST MISSOURI BEARCATS – 6-1- The Bearcats are the reigning D2 Champions and have played in the past 5 championship games in a row, so watch out come playoff time when Mel Tjeerdsma’s young men like to pour it on!

5. TEXAS A&M-KINGSVILLE JAVELINAS – 7-1- NFL Hall Of Famer Darrell Green played his college ball for this institution back when they were called Texas A&I.

6. ALBANY (GA) STATE GOLDEN RAMS – 8-0 – The Fleece’s “Gold Rush” Offensive Line (no connection to the Xavier, LA teams called the Gold Rush), their “Dirty Blue Defense” and all the other parts of this formidable machine are humming along perfectly with the Stillman Tigers their next target.

7. CENTRAL MISSOURI MULES – 8-1 – The Mules have been stubbornly kicking butts in the MIAA conference and are making a name as a team nobody wants to face in the playoffs.

8. AUGUSTANA VIKINGS – 8-0 – A Vikings team with no losses? That can only mean they’re not the Vikings team with that whiney drama queen Brett “We’re losing?…Uh, my elbow hurts, uh, no,no, my ankle hurts…yeah that’s it” Favre under center. (That’s right, since I don’t work for a certain 4-letter network I’m not required to kiss Favre’s butt like they do and I can describe him as he is)

9. NEBRASKA-KEARNEY LOPERS – 7-1 – This team is further proof that a cool nickname plus cool helmets = gridiron success! (I’m just kidding!)

10. VALDOSTA STATE BLAZERS – 6-1- In Georgia they still take their football very, very seriously and the Blazers have a reputation for seldom disappointing their fans. They most recently won it all in 2007.  

11. SHEPHERD RAMS – 8-0 – Another undefeated team and additionala proof of how tough it is to be ranked in D2 football.

12. CALIFORNIA (PA) VULCANS – 7-1 – No, they’re not named after Mr Spock’s home planet, they’re named after the Roman equivalent of the Greek god of fire, Hephaestus. Their helmets sport a picture of Vulcan using his hammer in his forge and many readers have asked me when they’ll be a Cool-Named Team Of The Day.

13. BLOOMSBURG HUSKIES – 7-1 – Even without Lance Mackey leading the team (Iditarod jokes! Who DOESN’T love them?) are doing pretty well for themselves, aren’t they?

14. WEST TEXAS A&M BUFFALOES – 6-2 – Unlike Division 1’s Buffaloes, this West Texas A&M team still plays all four quarters and their record shows it.

15. KUTZTOWN GOLDEN BEARS – 8-0 – It’s Kutztown, not Klutztown so keep your wisecracks to yourself!

16. COLORADO MINES OREDIGGERS – 7-1 – Not to be confused with the NAIA’s Montana Tech Orediggers, this team is known and feared by its fellow Rocky Mountain Athletic Conference teams.

17. HILLSDALE CHARGERS – 6-2 – There’s no Norv Turner (AKA Schleprock from those Teen Pebbles And Bam-Bam cartoons) to gum things up, so these Chargers are doing very well, thank you.  

18. WINSTON-SALEM RAMS – 8-1 – So far nobody is second-guessing the Rams’ decision to move down from Division 1 to Division 2. Sometimes a move like that just makes sense all around.

19. DELTA STATE STATESMEN – 6-2 – It’s hard to believe a team with only one loss in the perennially tough Gulf South Conference (often called the SEC of D2) is ranked this low! Their only other loss was to a Division 1 team early in the season.

20. ST CLOUD STATE HUSKIES – 7-1 – I’ve always felt this school should call its teams The Cloudbursts instead, but under any name they are rumbling toward the post-season looking for a high seed.

21. NORTH ALABAMA LIONS – 6-2 – THE Terry Bowden, the one and only member of the Bowden coaching family who is still a Head Coach, is in his second year with the Lions and hoping to make up for last season’s disappointing end.

22. MIDWESTERN STATE MUSTANGS – 6-2 – This team has made everyone in the Lone Star Conference forget about all the other teams called Mustangs in the college ranks.

23. ST AUGUSTINE’S FALCONS – 7-1 – You Bob Dylan fans can insert your own “I Dreamed I Saw St Augustine” joke here, the rest of us will just soak in the excellent play this team treats football fans to, week in and week out.

24. MERCYHURST LAKERS – 6-2 – No, your eyes are not deceiving you, there are TWO teams called Lakers on this Top 25 List and neither one of them is from Los Angeles, but they’re both well-respected by D2 football fans.

25. FT VALLEY STATE WILDCATS – 7-1 – Yes, this list had two Wildcat teams and one team of Bulldogs, but no Eagles or Tigers, oddly enough. I think that’s one of the signs of the Apocalypse. The West Alabama Tigers just dropped out of the Poll and this is one of those rare years when the Carson-Newman Eagles aren’t ranked this late in the season.

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