Welcome back to Balladeer’s Blog, as always coming to you from an America being needlessly torn in two by those walking caricatures called Liberals and Conservatives. Presented for your reading pleasure is a look at the most thoroughly repulsive American Liberals and American Conservatives so far in this still- young century.
1. MOST REPULSIVE LIBERAL – BARACK OBAMA – Could there be any doubt? This utter failure of a president violates the Constitution and persists in the cheap and worn-out game of blaming his predecessor for everything bad but trying to take credit for anything good. And if you doubt the part about violating the Constitution just ask the Supreme Court, which TWENTY TIMES has UNANIMOUSLY ruled that Obama did so and invalidated his actions. Little Barry has earned a name as “the piece of dogshit stubbornly clinging to the bottom of history’s shoes” with his weak, inept and crooked performance as president.
In the future I’m sure America will have African American presidents who really are brilliant and capable and all of the things Obama is NOT. For right now this global embarrassment has caused so much damage that even his callous, unthinking and unfeeling worshippers are having a tougher and tougher time trying to make excuses for him. A creepy and fascistic cult of personality is Little Barry’s only strength while his tiresome way of racially profiling all white people shows what kind of a hatemonger he is.
Obama has no talents or skills and says the dumbest things a president has ever said when he doesn’t have the crutch of a teleprompter (youtube has collections of Barry’s more imbecilic remarks). He’s also a cheap racebaiter who cynically hid his corruption and incompetence behind the country’s reluctance to criticize its first African American president the way he should have been criticized. Overall Barack Obama is a piece of sewage who bubbled and gurgled up from the cesspool of Chicago politics.
1. MOST REPULSIVE CONSERVATIVE – RUSH LIMBAUGH – Rush Limbaugh is pretty much the Conservative version of Barack Obama. Both men have nothing but bluster and a pack of brain- dead devotees who bob their heads up and down in agreement with everything their object of worship says. In fact “If Rush Limbaugh Was President” would be the perfect way of assessing the way in which mindless demagogues are safer in the public sector than in high office.
Just as everything Obama says is an outright distortion of the facts to fan the flames of hatred that’s also how it is with Limbaugh. Whenever the facts contradict Obama’s political prejudices he twists the facts to fit his prejudices, rather than the other way around. So too with Limbaugh. However, Rush adds the extra element of being even more clueless at times than Little Barry. Remember when “El Rushbo” as his worshippers call him worked himself up into a rage by mistakenly thinking the supervillain Bane in The Dark Knight Rises was supposed to be a shot at Mitt Romney’s Bain Capital? Turns out Bane had been a Batman villain for a few decades already and the name had nothing to do with a Liberal Hollywood crusade against Romney.
Limbaugh pompously insists that American Conservatives don’t need “a bigger tent” and should get rid of everyone not towing the Conservative line as defined by his own bizarre pronouncements. And he says that in spite of the way the GOP managed to blow the 2012 elections despite the overall dissatisfaction with Little Barry. A party that can’t beat a weak candidate like Obama is in no position to alienate even one potential voter with an air of exclusivity, let alone with public insults from a noted hatemonger.
2nd MOST REPULSIVE LIBERAL – CHRIS MATTHEWS – It’s fun to picture Edward R Murrow returning from the grave to personally kick the ass of this weak-minded fool who has come to embody the way the media has completely forfeited their role as “the Fourth Estate”. Matthews and his colleagues are just Democratic Party operatives posing as reporters, as evidenced by Chrissy’s ridiculous line about how his leg tingles when he hears Obama reading from a teleprompter.
Matthews’ career trajectory took him from a job as Jimmy Carter’s shoeshine boy to a job as public laughingstock humping the leg of the only U.S. president to outdo Carter at incompetence. Chrissy often looks incredibly disheveled, a peculiar failing in someone who works in the television industry. Even worse is how uninformed and how cowardly Matthews is. He’s earned a reputation for trying to bully any guests who point out his untruths and his political myth-making.
While Matthews is the public face of the absence of journalistic integrity it should be noted that American Conservatives have only themselves to blame for how much Liberal-biased shows have come to drastically outnumber Conservative-biased shows. The money and power people of the American right settled for a lose-lose strategy of simply complaining about media bias rather than investing LONG ago in more media outlets of their own.
2nd MOST REPULSIVE CONSERVATIVE – BILL O’REILLY – Bill O’Reilly is a walking example of the pompous, obnoxious and would-be regal isolation of his political party’s rich pigs. He’s the kind of “white guy in a suit” that people mean when they use that saying as a catch-all for everything wrong with the two-party political system.
O’Reilly is not “looking out for” anyone except himself, bilking his followers of money with the giddy abandon of a sleazy televangelist. Bill peddles the hope of the return of that America that never existed – the land of white picket fences and even whiter politics where everyone “knew their place” and all problems were kept out of the public eye and never discussed. When he tries to act all 21st Century O’Reilly is equally annoying and seems to want to rival Glenn Beck in terms of staking out ridiculous positions that are at odds with most of his own bizarre worldview.
Al Franken would be the American Liberal who is most similar to Bill O’Reilly. Both pretend to a gravitas they don’t possess and both are fond of the shallow and meaningless grandstanding that is more show-biz than statesmanlike. No wonder they got on each other’s nerves so much. O’Reilly’s ego and tendency to throw even his own ostensible allies under the bus to latch onto a fashionable idea has alienated even many on the political right. “Vacuous prick” is the two-word phrase that best captures why people find O’Reilly so despicable.
3rd MOST REPULSIVE LIBERAL – MICHAEL MOORE – Yes, it’s the man who put the “pig” in bloated rich pig, Michael Moore. If there’s one thing that Liberals, Conservatives, Reddit commenters and I all agree on it’s that Michael Moore is “a disgusting, hypocritical douchebag.” Moore first inflicted his presence on the American public with Roger & Me, the movie where he exploited the plight of laid-off auto workers to launch a film career. This vulture in whale form has been no stranger to picking at the carcass of national tragedies ever since, using the dead bodies of the Columbine Massacre victims as his personal soapbox for another film and the entire 9-11 attack to pad his bank account even more.
This loathsome hypocrite owned stock in Haliburton despite claiming he never soiled his hands with anything as capitalist as “stock” and has done post-production work on some of his movies in Canada where this self-proclaimed lover of unions can work free of Hollywood union restrictions. Plus, after claiming capitalism did nothing for him he’s fighting his soon-to- be ex-wife for tens of millions of dollars in assets. How very materialistic of him!
Mikey pretends to care about the poor, often using that “99 %” cliche that American Liberals have become so fond of. If Moore really cared about that 99% why doesn’t he divest himself of all but a million or so dollars of his own fortune and donate the rest to the poor? Oh, right, he only likes judging what OTHER PEOPLE should do with their money.
This rotund, self-important waste of biomass is a classic example of how ignorant of history American Liberals are. Oh, they know every single disgusting thing the United States has ever been guilty of, but they remain hopelessly ignorant of the heinous offenses of nearly every other country in the world. Becoming familiar with the failures and crimes of other nations would complicate their simple-minded view that history is a story of “good guys” and “bad guys” with America being the bad guys in their view and every opponent of America being the good guys. It’s, like, so DEEP to condemn only your own country while giving others a free pass.
3rd MOST REPULSIVE CONSERVATIVE – BRENT BOZELL III – L. Brent Bozell III is to the Brent Bozell series what Godfather Part III is to The Godfather series. Bozell founded and presides over the conservative Media Research Center as well as other watch-dog organizations that are trying to keep this whole sex and violence thing a secret. If you had a time machine you could probably find 1800’s school marms who think Grandma Bozell here needs to lighten up about sex.
Brent epitomizes those Conservatives who think every form of entertainment, education and communication in the world should contain nothing that would shock a nine year old child just because nine year olds might stumble upon something beyond their experience. This situation might lead to the child asking their parents uncomfortable questions.
Those questions would, of course, challenge the hilariously outdated and immature attitudes that so many American Conservatives have toward human sexuality. Bozell and his like-minded followers think it’s preferable to wipe out as many traces of sex and violence as they possibly can rather than actually become enough of a part of their children’s lives to police their exposure to adult topics.
Brent’s writings on American films and television shows are laugh riots, especially when the delicate Mr Bozell gives his harrumphing opinion that the USA produces the most violent and sexually explicit entertainment in the world. I’d love to see Bozell’s reaction to a marathon of Category 3 movies from Hong Kong. By the end of the first hour he’d probably be wistfully longing for comparatively wholesome programming like Nip/Tuck, one of his frequent targets for criticism.
4th MOST REPULSIVE LIBERAL – NANCY PELOSI – Nancy “The Woman with E.T.’s Eyes” Pelosi embodies everything that people despise about Liberal office-holders: she is sickeningly sanctimonious, hilariously pretentious and hypersensitive to the point of absurdity – but only about issues that upset the left. The race and heritage of anyone on the political right is fair game in Nancy’s “politics trumps all” universe.
In addition Pelosi hypocritically condemns other people’s wealth while being a bloated rich pig herself. Her son is being investigated for the kind of corporate corruption Pelosi and her ilk condemn in the repulsive Bush family but overlook among their own. Nancy is also more than happy to fob off untold millions of illegal immigrants on the nation to make the taxpayers suffer and to lower the wages paid to unskilled laborers all while posing as a champion of the working class.
Pelosi’s most public display of her sorry intellect and used car dealer smarminess came with her infamous “You have to pass it to see what’s in it” remark about Obamacare. What kind of an imbecile says something like that about ANY piece of legislation, let alone one that has negatively impacted the lives of millions? Pelosi’s career plays like a demo reel of the Democratic Party’s ugly, UGLY approach: lying, racebaiting, lying, making impossible promises and then blaming opponents when those promises can’t be kept and, of course, more lying.
4th MOST REPULSIVE CONSERVATIVE – GLENN BECK – The only people nuttier than Beck has become are the little men inside his head who keep whispering to him and encouraging his bizarre, paranoid and childishly contrarian behavior. Beck comes across like a political version of the Batman villain Two-Face: he seems to just flip a coin to see which side of an issue he stands on on that particular day.
Undermining long-time allies and empowering long-time enemies are two actions that have become Beck’s stock-in-trade and his lack of consistency on any issue makes the constantly dissimulating Rand Paul seem staunch and unwavering by comparison.
Beck’s credibility has all but evaporated as he ocillates between Alex Jones- level hysteria about the federal government and Bill O’Reilly- level ego-trips in which he thinks that embracing political masochism is the wave of the future for him and his followers. The memory of Glenn Beck’s feverish, conspiratorial whispering as he greeted his viewers long ago has turned out to be the prevailing image. And he comes across as John McCain’s crazier brother the way he thrives on periodically sabotaging his own side to pander to fashionable notions that will get him positive media attention.
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